All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players, was something Shakespeare wrote. A play within a play- and a profound truth to boot (if you like it that way).
Have you ever experienced really lopsided communication? A conversation where one person is full of the fires of passion and one totally rational? This odd and frustrating mismatch has happened for time immemorial - particularly in our relationships.
Many of us have experienced feeling rational, distant and maybe even aloof while our partner tries to incite a reaction- using assumptions, miscommunications, maybe even seductive complements or insults. Many of us have been on the other side as well- trying to incite a riot from someone else. A riot of fire, of passion, caring, or defense - anything to feel like we are engaging our partner, not drifting apart.
What would it be like to master these different modes of communication, choose them at will, and move rapidly toward a desired result? What if we could participate in a dramaction (a drama played out as a substitute for true action), enjoy the show and walk away unscathed? What if we could use our passions to fuel our desired outcome? What if we could use our rationality to match the intensity level of the other person, and communicate more effectively?
Here Shakespeare's metaphor is so useful. As we step back for a moment into the awareness that we are all choosing roles in the play of life, we are able to play big and play off of each other. We can match intensity level- create a memorable scene and stand with our partner to an ovation. We can also take the stage, stand aside the plot and give a soliloquy that will take the house down. Our success depends not on winning a battle as our character, but the mastery with which we play our part.
In the big picture of our lives, our results always lie in the overall success of the play. They lie in our part, our actions and our ability to bring the best out of the other players. The best actors are fueled from within, play huge, and use the mode of communication that best fits the situation at hand - the one that best suits the scene.
Master actors can choose passion or rationality, energy level and style. They can also choose to use their rationality to stoke their passion, and select reactions that support the scene. They remember their overall agenda- the success of the play. They "get lost in the action" and never forget that they are acting. The master knows there is no glory in standing up alone in a lousy play. The master makes the scene, and makes their scene-mates into stars.
Who will you make a star today?
Action and Passion - To learn more about this author, visit Elizabeth Mullen's Website.
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