In today’s hectic world, most of us feel we need ‘more time’ – certainly I have been struggling with getting enough this month (yes, this month’s Tips are slightly late!) – so lets take a closer look how we can create and manage our time.
CREATING A RESERVE OF TIME What would it be like if you had a reserve of time? What would you do if you had time ‘left over’? Would you finally be able to do all of the things you want to do – instead of just the things you have to do? But how can you make this happen? Let me take you through this scenario. See if it rings true to you. You have an appointment at 12:30. You know it takes 25–30 minutes to drive there, so you plan to leave at 12. But just a few minutes before the hour, the phone goes and by the time you’re out of the door, it’s 12:03. At the end of the road, an old gentleman in his flat cap is signalling right, but he seems to be waiting forever before turning on to the main road. As you are wait behind him, you start anxiously looking at the clock, muttering “come-on!” under your breath and tapping impatiently on the steering wheel. Now you’re on the main road, you are pushing the speed limit all the way. Then just before the last turn there is tractor and trailer! You arrive at 12:32 – made it! Well, as near as damn it. But what are you feeling right now? Are you calm and clear headed? Are you in the best shape for your appointment? No! You’re probably still stressed and harassed from your journey.
I know what that’s like: I used to do it far too often. So how can you change things? Knowing a journey takes 30 minutes, build-in an extra 10 minutes. When you leave 10 minutes earlier than usual and you encounter slow moving traffic, you can remain relaxed because you know you have the time. In most cases you will arrive early at your destination but this gives you time to either mentally prepare for a meeting, or catch up on a trade magazine or read part of a book. Using this as a model, how else can you start to build in a reserve of time?
HOW WE EXPERIENCE TIME How many times did you look at your watch today? And when you looked, how fast had the hours passed since you last looked? On the face of it, that’s a strange question to ask, isn’t it? Time is quantifiable. We have watches, clocks, computers, calendars and myriad of other things that show us the accurate passing of time, yet how we experience it often doesn’t relate to the sweep of a clock’s hands nor the passing of the days.
We’ve all had days when it seems that each minute lasts an hour. Time drags it’s feet when we are bored, or when we are waiting, or are fearful. We also have all had days when time has flown. Like when we are having fun, or when we are busy, or when we have a deadline to meet. Different activities and emotional states impact on how we experience time. So can you change how you experience it? The simple answer is, yes!
The ideal way of experiencing time is for it to be neither too clock-watchingly slow, nor going so fast we feel like we’re on a hamster wheel. When there is time to do things you love to do, and have time to enjoy them, then life is richer, more fun and more delightful. You can change the way you experience time by changing your activity level and your emotional responses. Changing your activity level is relatively easy, but lots of people believe that they can not change their emotions. Yet I know you can.
Imagine it’s Wednesday night. You are so fed-up of work – it’s such a drag. Work is boring. Your workmates are boring. Even your social life is boring. There are still 2 whole more days to go before the weekend. After dinner, you are tired. You sit down and switch on the TV. The Lottery results are just being announced. The numbers look familiar, so you pull out a slip of paper from your pocket. Scribbled on it are the 6 syndicate numbers. To your utter amazement the 6 numbers match! What happens next? Are you dancing round the room? Are shouting, laughing, are you calling out to your family: “We’re rich!”? Are you calling your ‘boring’ workmates and sharing the great news? Are you celebrating with family and friends? Did you suddenly notice it was 1 a.m. in the morning?
Yes, probably all of these things you would do. But what happened here? The news you had won a lot of money, made the difference, you say! Now imagine that the next day you found out that the ticket hadn’t been purchased? What do you feel then? Are you outraged, angry, upset, and depressed? But why? You are exactly in the same place you were yesterday. As hard as it might seem, you have a choice, even in trying situations like this, you can choose whether you 'react' (as above) or you can choose to 'respond' with emotions that will serve you better. When you react to life's ups and downs you are victim to circumstance operating without choice. When you learn to respond, you decide what emotions best serve you, then you are in control and you get to choose the outcome for your life.
If the above scenario was for real, would I be able to respond instead of react? I don’t know! I hope I would respond not react. But as with all things in coaching, lets start with small steps and build up to bigger ones as we get better with our new skills.
SLOWING DOWN TIME Imagine you’re at work. The pressure is on because there is a deadline to get the work finished by 5 p.m. Time is going by so fast! You realise you are getting agitated. You are also becoming short-tempered with people around you. You are rushing and becoming cross with yourself berating yourself for leaving it to the last minute. How can you change things? To get ‘more’ time, you need to both slow down and change your emotions. Try taking 10 minutes time out. Find a quiet spot (the loo will do if there is nowhere else). Now close your eyes and take some deep breaths – really deep into the lower part of your lungs. Now choose to change your emotional response. Replace anxiety with a feeling of calm. Visualise somewhere you like to visit. ‘See’ yourself there – enjoying this lovely place. Stay there for awhile seeing it all in your mind. Relax. Breathe. Now come back to the present and in your mind’s eye, see the job you have to do. What is the best way to complete the job? What do you need to do next? If anxiety immediately comes back, let it go. Repeat the breathing and revisit your favourite place. Now ‘see’ yourself finishing the job easily and on time. This exercise helps you ‘slow’ down time and it allows your intuition guide you to the best way to complete the job.
TIME MANAGEMENT I’m not a time management guru – but the following system works for me. First I decided what I wanted from my week. It involved starting work at 10 a.m. so I have time to exercise and not rush my mornings. I also decided that Monday to Wednesday were to be my coaching days and then Thursday and Friday were for admin, business planning, marketing, and sometimes, just having ‘fun’ days. Being self employed, I have this luxury, but even if you are employed, you still have some choices available to you – are you making the most of yours?
I also have a master ‘To Do’ list. On this is everything I need to do in the next few weeks. Anything I’m worried I might forget about, gets added to this list. I usually rewrite it once a month as by that time, lots of things have been crossed off.
I have a calendar on my computer that lists all of my appointments – clients and personal ones too. These are colour coded for ease of reference.
Every morning I look at my calendar and my master list and write my daily ‘To Do’ list for the day. I try not to add too many things from the master list – so when I get to the end of the day usually everything has been done. I love it when everything has been crossed off my list – there is a great sense of achievement.
No matter what system you undertake, good time management needs just that – a system. If you use something that works for you, do share it with me – I love to hear about the different ways that people find work for them.
------------------1To receive more coaching tips and/or to receive them monthly by email, please see www.reddandelion.co.uk
NOT ENOUGH HOURS IN THE DAY? HOW TO 'CREATE' TIME - To learn more about this author, visit Jennie Bayliss's Website.
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