“A Perfect 10”?

As women, we expect to be perfect.

We want to be the best at work. We strive to be perfect parents. Our homes and gardens aspire to be in “Vogue Interiors”. We try to present an immaculately groomed persona to the world.

I coach a lot of women who need to let go of the “should” elements in their lives. I encourage them to see that ‘less is more’. I ask them to focus on those limited things which result in a positive sense of quality. I teach them to see their own value. I help them to determine what it is in their lives which drives them to extremes, and then to let go, to give it away.

I encourage them to stop beating themselves up about the things they haven’t done – the unreturned phone message, the pile of washing – and to organise their schedule so they have time for things they value. Why not hire some home help, or a gardener, in order to free up time to watch the children at soccer practice, or to spend a lunch-time with your partner?

Many of the women I see constantly compare themselves unfavourably with other mums, or their peers, or men. Why not decide that who you are, right now, is OK? Don’t procrastinate. Take a look at your life and start eliminating those things now which are not essential to your happiness.

I particularly encourage women under pressure to allocate “me time” in their diaries. It might be to go for a walk, to go to the gym, or simply to read a book. Having creative, thinking time is part of the process of accepting who you are.

One woman I coached decided she wanted to lose weight for an important occasion, but as soon as the function was over she put the weight straight back on. She was very disappointed and unhappy. Her goal was based on a whim - “I should lose weight because my friend says I look fat in this dress.”

What she really needed was a realistic goal. It requires energy to make the change from “should” to “will”. Often changing the language can alter the perspective.

Very few plans survive an encounter with reality. But if some core values and achievable goals are established, we have the power to overcome any setbacks.

If we truly accept ourselves and know we deserve the success we desire, we can start, today, to put our plans into action.

By Julianne Kuhlmann Personal & Leadership Coach Kool Results "Putting You First"

Personal & Business Coaching, Leadership Development, Individual Training Programs,Work/life balance, Mentoring & Induction, Organisational performance Email: info@koolresults.com.au Web: www.koolresults.com.au

“A Perfect 10”? - To learn more about this author, visit Julianne Kuhlmann's Website.

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