I should find a way to stamp these words on all my clients’ hands.
I strongly believe that the mind is a very powerful tool. Our thoughts send out messages which make us behave in certain ways.
Our approach to new situations is often governed by what is going on inside our head, and not by external factors.
Take one of my clients. She has just started her own business. I am coaching her to step out of her comfort zone, and “get out there”.
“But I haven’t been doing it long enough. I am not confident to get out there and promote myself,” she worries.
I encourage her to recognise the qualities she already has. It is her behaviour which needs to change. She is doing something she can already do, but the “new business” tag is making her tread carefully.
Her motivation will come from interacting with her clients, and seeing her qualities and skills at work. She will boost her confidence and create energy in her business.
This is a coaching tool I use a lot, and try to encourage other leaders to use. The key is to ask the question, “What?” “What happened in this situation? What did I learn from it? What would I do differently next time?” This is all the motivation you need.
Never try to point the finger and ask “Why?” or “Who?” This only produces a negative response.
Another client of mine believed she could handle a situation on her own, and felt it was her fault when a matter was not resolved.
She said, “What is the point talking to my boss anyway? He won’t listen. He won’t do anything.” She talked herself into failure before she’d even begun.
I coached her to develop strategies for speaking with her boss. Her positive attitude got his attention. She felt more empowered, and motivated to move on.
Confidence breeds confidence. I often talk about visualising situations which you find confronting. Put yourself there – feel it, touch it, be aware of your surroundings. Then go out and face it.
The more we do this, the more motivated we become. It rolls off the tongue more easily. We feel more comfortable.
It is easy to beat yourself up. My job is to remind you of the positives, to encourage you to reward yourself. How about some self-recognition?
Surround yourself with inspirational quotes. Stick them up on your computer, on the fridge, on your desk. How about: “If it’s going to be, it’s up to me.”
By Julianne Kuhlmann
Personal & Leadership Coach
Kool Results
"Putting You First"
Personal & Business Coaching, Leadership Development, Individual Training Programs,Work/life balance, Mentoring & Induction, Organisational performance
Email: info@koolresults.com.au Web: www.koolresults.com.au
I can do it…….I can do it! - To learn more about this author, visit Julianne Kuhlmann's Website.
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