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It's The Way That You Say It That Makes The Difference

It's The Way That You Say It That Makes The Difference

"OK, so what's happened? ... Well, yes you can do it that way. And let me show you a way that sometimes works well for us too"

"You did what - that's crazy. Why didn't you do it the way you were told? Don't you ever listen to what I say?"

Two approaches - pretty clearly eh?

If you were on the receiving end of these two acknowledgements of when something seems to have gone wrong, how would you feel about the relationship you have with your boss/manager etc?

Employees try their best - really - in the main they want to do a good job. They don't try to get things wrong - and yet sometimes they do.

That's life.

And we can beat them up for it - or we can understand and help them get over it.

The two approaches above are examples I've come across, in the last week, observing types of manager approach their people when things have gone wrong.

The first was from an excellent manager, who has her team with her, because she supports and encourages them when things don't work out quite right.

The second was from, admittedly, a less experienced manager, who was determined to make an example of his employee (so much so that she ended up in tears).

Employees are a hardy bunch. Frankly, they usually dust themselves down and get on with it.

And each time they are treated without respect it nibbles away at their self-confidence and helps them feel unworthy and useless.

It is not a nice thing to feel after you've done your days work. It impacts on their home life and the way they cope with the world.

Manager two was still embroiled in his own ego and inexperience. Showing his bullying capabilities from a position of power (and in the case mentioned, they were dealing with a very insecure member of their team - one they knew would not answer back).

The language we use as managers can be developmental or destructive - we have that onerous choice to make.

To build people's capabilities or crush them, through the way we speak and work with them.





Its The Way That You Say It That Makes The Difference - To learn more about this author, visit Martin Haworth's Website.

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Kim Castle
With nearly two decades in the advertising and design business, with clients like Domino's Pizza, General Motors, Direct TV, Pedigree, Wolfgang Puck, Higher Octave Music, Hollywood Celebrity Products, Disney, and Paramount, as well as thousands of entrepreneurs around the world define, structure, communicate, and position their business for greater profits, BrandU(R) co-creators Kim Castle and W. Vito Montone discovered that entrepreneurs could experience the same power that big brands command for a fraction of the cost with the world's only process-based results-drive Integral approach to business creation. BrandU(R) is helping entrepreneurs grow with the power of extreme clarity from idea...to brand...to market(TM) and helping one million entrepreneurs become successful and whole so that they can make a difference in the world. Are you one of them? If you want to experience clarity all the way to the bank(TM), get started now at http://www.brandu.com. - Visit Kim Castle's Website


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Martin Haworth
(Visit Martin's Website) (c) 2009 Martin Haworth is a business and management coach and trainer. He is the author of Super Successful Manager!, an easy to use, step-by-step weekly development program for managers of EVERY skill level. You can get a sample lesson for free at http://www.SuperSuc cessfulManager.com.

Martin Haworth is a Platinum author on EvanCarmichael.com
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