Feedback Form
Home Features Mastermind Forums About Advertise Blog Network Contact Be An Author

Top Ten Things You Would Never Hear a Coach Say or then again

Top Ten Things You Would Never Hear a Coach Say or then again

When coaching, it's all about the client, be that as a professional coach, or a line manager/business owner using coaching skills in their own business, with their own people. But it's so easy sometimes to turn the tables and be the client..oh, so easy...:-)

1. Let Me Tell You About My Day
Coaching is about the client and NOT about the coach, usually. Sometimes a coaching experience might be worth a share if a coachee is stuck – but not usually. It’s all about them – not you. Honour that.
2. Well, You’re Just Useless Aren’t You!
It’s bad enough to criticise them for their past – but this reinforces their own self-doubt about their future. You have even taken away their hope for goodness sakes. A coach’s role is to enable potential and open the client's eyes to possibilities. Not slam it shut.
3. You Think You’ve Got Problems - Well, Let Me Tell You…
OK, so you’ve got some issues you are facing yourself. Sorry about that. In a coaching context, you are there to support and grow the client – not devalue what is truly on their mind, by filling it up with your issues. You can share them – but on your time, not theirs.
4. What I’d Do is This…
Now this is very tempting – and sometimes (‘Stop coaching me for a minute, throw me a rope!’) it might, just might be acceptable – yes, I have done it myself! But in the main, the coach’s job is to extract the greatness out of the client and then build on their abilities and confidence going forward.
5. Sit Down and Shut Up, I’ve Got Something to Say
No, we haven’t quite got the hang of this here, have we? Coaching is about listening, more especially, really hearing and asking some challenging questions - maybe. Even listening is all some clients need – they process solutions as they talk – it’s remarkable. So how does the line above help that? Not at all.
6. Well, You’ve Wasted the Last 20 Years of your Life then Haven’t You…
Spot the mistake here then? Everyone in the world has value, often untapped and often hidden under piles and piles of history and baggage. Your job is to help them rise above it – NOT to stick another six of the best Samsonite’s on the top!
7. Excuse Me if I Just Check my E-mail While You’re Talking
Ever done two things at once? In the case of a coaching relationship, trust and focus are vital to build the relationship. If you are doing something else when talking to the client, you are not giving your full attention, whether the discussion is on the phone or face to face. Make sure there are no interruptions or distractions.
8. I’m Not Interested in What’s Causing the Problem – Let’s Just Fix it Fast
You could do this…but where will they come next time for a solution. Yes, to you. So when will this stop? When can you get on with your own job? When you take the time to build their ability to solve their own problems – that’s when. It requires questions and a ‘blame-free’ culture. And it requires a coaching style.
9. I’ll Tell You What Your Problem is…
Go on then, do it. This takes a punch at what their weaknesses are and not their strengths. People already know where their weaknesses are, believe me. Coaches build on strengths and leverage them to cope with areas that the client finds more challenging.
10. Can I Call You for a Date?
Just for fun this one. But with a serious side. It is challenging to have a professional relationship and have other things on your mind. It is quite hard to be very objective if there are other distractions – so take care in this area. Though coaching in Starbucks would be my idea of bliss! Oh, yes - and according to the International Coach Federation, quite understandably, it's unethical.

The constructive way to use this is to take the opposite courses of action to those listed - then you will have the foundation of a valuable coaching relationship with your client, privately or in your workplace.

Martin Haworth is a business and management coach and trainer, working with a range of clients from corporates to individuals worldwide. www.MartinHaworth.com





Top Ten Things You Would Never Hear a Coach Say or then again - To learn more about this author, visit Martin Haworth's Website.

Like this article? Share it with your friends

Article Feedback
 Article Feedback No article feedback found.
  Leave Your Feedback
article feedback

Article Feedback
Cheryl Matthynssens

Cheryl is a life skills coach, licensed Chemical Dependency Counselor and a 20 year entrepreneur.  Cheryl's dedication to achieving a life of balance led to her expanding her teaching from the simple managing of life's daily challenges to adding financial well being as well.  A direct marketer with DrinkACT, she is gaining ground in the online community with her concepts of making sure business owners, entreprenuers and employees have well rounded life styles.  She opened up a small affiliate site - The Balance Guide-  to help others find resources for mental and emotional well being.  Visit Cheryl's blog to see more of the diversity beyond business she has began offering online at www.thebalanceguide.blogspot.com

- Visit Cheryl Matthynssens's Website

Dianne Crampton

Dianne Crampton is an executive leadership coach, team culture consultant, author and president of TIGERS Success Series, Inc. Dianne has been helping CEO's and Executives connect their employees to their core values and goals for over 20 years using the trademarked TIGERS team culture process, which stands for trust, interdependence, genuineness, empathy, risk and success. To download a free white paper on behaviors that build strong teams and behaviors that will predictably tear them down go here.

Dianne's contribution to the 2010 Pfeiffer Consulting Journal (an imprint of John Wiley and Sons Publishers) entitled TIGERS Hearted Teams is available in November 2009.  Her new book TIGERS Among Us: 5 Winning Business Team Cultures And Why, Three Creeks Publishing will release in March 2010.  To receive publishing discounts, subscribe to the free TigerTracks Newsletter here.

- Visit Dianne Crampton's Website

Linda Richardson
Linda Richardson is the Founder and Executive Chairwoman of Richardson, a global sales training and performance improvement company. As a recognized leader in the industry, she has won the coveted Stevie Award for Lifetime Achievement in Sales Excellence and she was identified by Training Industry, Inc. as one of the “Top 20 Most Influential Training Professionals.” Ms. Richardson is credited with the movement to Consultative Selling and is the author of ten books on selling and sales management, including Sales Coaching — Making the Great Leap from Sales Manager to Sales Coach, and Stop Telling, Start Selling. She teaches sales and management at the Wharton Graduate School of the University of Pennsylvania and the Wharton Executive Development Center. Linda is a frequent speaker at industry and client conferences, has been published extensively in industry and training journals, and has been featured in numerous publications, including The Wall Street Journal, Forbes, Nation’s Business, Selling Power, Success, and The Conference Board Magazine. Learn more about Richardson's sales training and performance improvement solutions at http://www.richardson.com web - Visit Linda Richardson's Website


To learn more about the Evan Elite Author Program please contact us.

About The Author


Martin Haworth
(Visit Martin's Website) (c) 2009 Martin Haworth is a business and management coach and trainer. He is the author of Super Successful Manager!, an easy to use, step-by-step weekly development program for managers of EVERY skill level. You can get a sample lesson for free at http://www.SuperSuc cessfulManager.com.

Martin Haworth is a Platinum author on EvanCarmichael.com
About The Author

View Author Blog
Coaching Businesses to Success - Coaching Businesses to Success News Updates
Coaching Businesses to Success
View Author Blog

View Author Video
View Author Video

Free Downloads


Martin Haworth's

Complete
List Of
Business-Coach
Articles

Name
Email
If you enjoyed this article, get Martin Haworth's Complete List of Business-Coach Articles For FREE!

More Martin Haworth
10 Key Points You Must Know About Business Succession Planning
Succession Planning Tricks in Your Business and Organization
Improving Your Management Communications Skills Whats It Worth
Accepting Thank You With A Smile
Performance Expectations 5 Tips and 5 Questions
Building Trust in Your Business Relationships 10 Steps
Ten Ways To Be Better At Dealing With Difficult People
Ten Steps To Effective Meetings
Empowerment The Key To Developing Your Management Skills
Easy Team Building Tactics Making The Most Of More Of Your People
Free Downloads


 
 
 


Evan Elite Authors
John Alexander  
Casey Gollan  
Staging Diva  
Evan Elite Authors

Become An Author
Have you written articles that would be of value to entrepreneurs? Become an expert on our site by publishing them! Expose yourself to a wide audience, drive more traffic to your website and get more sales! Click Here for details.
Become An Author

Evan's Latest Video
Modeling the Masters: Learn the true secrets behind Walt Disney's business success factors & grow your company! Video produced by Phanta Media
Evan's Latest Video

Business Opportunities
"Learn straight from Evan how you can Make a Full Time Income (And More) from a Website"

How to Start An Online Business

Click Here To Learn More
Business Opportunities



Evan's Newsletter
Get advice & tips from famous business owners, new articles by entrepreneur experts, my latest website updates, & special sneak peaks at what's to come!
Name:
Email:
Evan`s Newsletter

Free Downloads
Why MLMs Fail Icon Why MLMs Fail
Make Attitude Your Ally Icon Make Attitude Your Ally
Managing Generations Icon Managing Generations
5 Step Action Plan Icon 5 Step Action Plan
Challenges Of Change Icon Challenges Of Change
Free Downloads - Complete List

Entrepreneur Tools and Guides
Top 50 Franchising Blogs
Top 50 Franchising Blogs
Top 50 Franchising Blogs
 
Top 50 SEO Posts of the Year
Top 50 SEO Posts - 2007
Top SEO Posts of the Year
 
Entrepreneur Tools and Guides

SEO For Africa
SEO For Africa
Cecilia Ama Mensah Cape Coast, Ghana,
Cecilia Ama Mensah
Cape Coast, Ghana
SEO For Africa

If I Were A Startup...
Kerry Shapansky, $2.0 to $51 Mil in 5 years
Kerry Shapansky
$2.0 to $51 Mil in 5 years
Frank Cianciulli, $2.3 to $7.5 Mil in 2 years
Frank Cianciulli
$2.3 to $7.5 Mil in 2 years
If I Were A Startup... - Complete List

Famous Entrepreneurs
Satoshi Tajiri, Pokemon
Larry Ellison, Oracle
Famous Entrepreneurs - Complete List

Entrepreneur Advice
Keith Ferrazzi, Never Eat Alone
Keith Ferrazzi
Never Eat Alone
Timothy Ferriss, 4 Hour Work Week
Timothy Ferriss
4 Hour Work Week
Entrepreneur Advice - Complete List

Popular Articles
(Premium Authors)

     Adding Value to your Corporate Christmas Gift
By Elyse Cabral
     How Promotional Caps became a Fashion Trend
By Elyse Cabral
     Techniques to increase the effectiveness of your promotional marketing during a period of economic downturn
By Elyse Cabral

Have A Suggestion?
Toronto Salsa Classes / Toronto Salsa Lessons Email us your ideas on how to make our website more valuable! Thank you Sharon from Toronto Salsa Lessons / Classes for your suggestions to make the newsletter look like the website and profile younger entrepreneurs like Jennifer Lopez and Sean Combs!
Have A Suggestion?

More Evan Carmichael
More Information