Like this article? PLEASE +1 it! Evan Signature
Evan Carmichael Top Header
Share for a Cause









Personal Boundaries: The Key to Creating Work and Life Your Way

Guest post by: Kirsten Ross

Article Overview: When you think of the word boundary, what images does it conjure up; A fence around a pasture, a concrete barrier between two lanes of highway, how about the Berlin Wall? These are all physical boundaries. What about boundaries in your work and life?

Free Download - 20 Ways to Say No By Kirsten Ross
Name: Email:

Personal Boundaries: The Key to Creating Work and Life Your Way

When you think of the word boundary, what images does it conjure up; A fence around a pasture, a concrete barrier between two lanes of highway, how about the Berlin Wall?

These are all physical boundaries. What about boundaries in your work and life? Saying no without guilt, for example, provides a great boundary around your time.

Have you ever seen Stephen Covey give his demonstration with the bucket of rocks and the pail of sand? It is one my favorite visuals for boundaries.

He holds up a full bucket of sand and a pail of rocks and asks a participant how to fit the rocks into the sand. One after another, the participants try to push and force the rocks down into the sand. At most, they can get a small part of one or two rocks down into the sand. The rest of the rocks are just left out.

If you are not utilizing good boundaries, this is how you are living your life. You are starting with a bucket full of sand and are trying to fit in the big stuff to no avail.

Let me explain. In his analogy, the rocks represent the things that are most important to us in life; our core values, our core goals. The sand represents all of the little stuff; the phone calls, emails, junk mail, junk pile, gossip, obligations forced upon us. There is no end to this stuff. It is voluminous and WILL NOT go away.

The sources of little stuff are endless; your needy co-worker, your mother-in-law, your grown child, the unwanted sales person, the chatty neighbor, the gossipy friend. All of this stuff will fill the bucket that is your life if you let it. And, then how do the big things fit in? The career goals, family, time for you.

The answer to the Covey Puzzle is to start with the bucket filled with rocks. That is your core. From there, pour the sand around. These little things can fill in the crevices, the little bits of time in our lives, while the rocks stay solid. Life is filled first with what is important and the rest fills in where there is room. Some of the little stuff may be left out and that’s okay because the core is there.

The boundaries you set to protect what is most important to you are the key. Saying no without guilt, relieving yourself of obligations and spending time on the activities that add value to your life, instituting consequences when others are not respectful.

Which bucket do you start your day with? Are you trying to fit the rocks around the sand or the sand around the rocks? Will you create your life the way you want it or will you let others dictate your journey? You choose! Boundaries are your key.

Related Articles
  EXTEND YOUR BOUNDARIES
  Top 5 reasons to mix personal with business
  Women Entrepreneur Academy, Establishing Boundaries 101
  When Service Stops Feeling Good
  Bridges and Boundaries

Home > Business-Coach > Kirsten Ross > Personal Boundaries The Key to Creating Work and Life Your Way
Article Tags: berlin wall, bucket of rocks, career goals, co worker, concrete barrier, core goals, crevices, family time, full bucket, junk mail, junk pile, littl, little bits, mother in law, pasture, physical boundaries, sales person, stephen covey, two rocks, word boundary

About the Author: Kirsten Ross
RSS for Kirsten's articles - Visit Kirsten's website

Kirsten E. Ross brings a unique blend of energy and insight to her work with clients. Her clients efficiently gain self-awareness and create positive change that empowers leaders and improves communication and relationships. Her work creates productive, profitable workplaces. She is a Leadership & HR Coach with a Masters degree in Human Resource Management and a Senior Human Resource Certification. In addition, she brings more than 19 years of hands-on experience, has authored a variety of articles and e-books and has been interviewed as an expert for media such as: NBC Nightly News, Fox 2 News, National Public Radio and for publications such as Crains New York Business, Working Mother Magazine and Fitness Magazine. Kirsten is also an experienced speaker who will add inspiration and fun to any event infusing humor and self-awareness activities that keep audiences entertained. Participants will walk away with the targeted action plans and the motivation to impact their lives and work. Visit Kirsten’s coaching site:

Click here to visit Kirsten's website
Dashed Line

More from Kirsten Ross
A Toddlers Exercise Program A Recipe for Heart Health in More Ways than One
Elements of a Family Friendly Work Place
Dress for Success Even Working from home Requires a Dress Code
New School Year Lessons from a Middle Schooler
The Wage Gap is Alive Its no Surprise but What Can We Do


Related Forum Posts
The Second Life Platform The Second Life Platform - Greetings! I'm not sure how many of you have heard of or are sensitive to Second Life and its related entities. However, Second Life is a fantastic platform to mimmick real life business operations in a real currency based economy. There are plenty of successful stories for creative individuals, but I'd highly suggest doing your research and appreciating Second Life for what it is, and what it isn't.
Re: The Second Life Platform Re: The Second Life Platform - [quote="JBunion":fhe23fsu]Greetings! I'm not sure how many of you have heard of or are sensitive to Second Life and its related entities. However, Second Life is a fantastic platform to mimmick real life business operations in a real currency based economy. There are plenty of successful stories for creative individuals, but I'd highly suggest doing your research and appreciating Second Life for what it is, and what it isn't.[/quote:fhe23fsu] Hi JBunion, I've heard about the site. So are you currently a member? And more importantly, have you tried to open a store front in that virtual world?
Re: Balancing Your Man & Business Re: Balancing Your Man & Business - One issue is the same women face with little kids, if they run home based businesses. If you work out of your home, your man, or your kids, think you don't really work, and its okay to interrupt because it's "only them." But it actually is a major distraction to try to be doing some creative work and having your family coming at you all the time. Boundaries for home workers need to be set, and no guilting them out of it!
Re: Charge what you're worth Re: Charge what you're worth - [quote="Tami Szabo":292ze3jd]People will pay you what you ask. Very few will ever up the price. You are the one who decided what you are worth. The key is that we believe our services are worth the price we are asking.[/quote:292ze3jd] Hi Tami, You're absolutely right. In "Think and Grow Rich", Jessie B. Rittenhouse says "For Life is a just employer, He gives you what you ask, But once you have set the wages, Why, you must bear the task. I worked for a menial's hire Only to learn, dismayed , That any wage I had asked of Life, Life would have willingly paid" (Napoleon Hill 35). I think the same can be said when setting prices on eBay or Craigslist, especially when people are trying to haggle you.
Re: Can you outsource your product launch? Re: Can you outsource your product launch? - Yes that what I am talking about. Creating a buzz for your online product launch basically. Is this part of what you do?


Recommended Article for You close

  EXTEND YOUR BOUNDARIES

Share this article with your friends. Fund someone's dream.

Leave a comment below or share on the left and you'll help support entrepreneurs in Africa through our partnership with Kiva. Over $50,000 raised and counting - Please keep sharing! Learn more.



Featured Article


Bottom Footer
Share for a Cause












Newsletter

Get advice & tips from famous business
owners, new articles by entrepreneur
experts, my latest website updates, &
special sneak peaks at what's to come!
Name:
Email:
Popular Articles

Improve E-mail: Avoid the Quicksand

Let's Skip the Offshore Horror Stories

Suggestions

Email us your ideas on how to make our
website more valuable! Thank you Sharon
from Toronto Salsa Lessons / Classes for
your suggestions to make the newsletter
look like the website and profile younger
entrepreneurs like Jennifer Lopez.