Tweet

Refine Your Work Life Balance by Setting Healthy Boundaries

Written by: Molly Gordon

Article Overview: Do you think of boundaries as ways to keep something or someone out in hope to maintain your work life balance and protect your time, energy, and resources? What do healthy boundaries look like, and how can you know where and how to set them? Let's take a big breath and take another look at this business of setting boundaries.

Refine Your Work Life Balance by Setting Healthy Boundaries

Setting healthy boundaries is essential for a healthy work life balance. That sounds true, but what does it mean? What do healthy boundaries look like, and how can you know where and how to set them?

I notice a tendency among small business owners and free agents to think of boundaries as ways to keep something or someone out, as if they could achieve work life balance in this way. This emphasizes protection of their time, energy, and resources. This kind of boundary is a line in the sand. When a customer, colleague, or vendor crosses the line, an alarm goes off, signaling the business owner to say "No."

Because most owners want their businesses to be accessible and to offer excellent service, they are naturally conservative in setting this sort of boundary. After all, they want to say, "Welcome" to prospective customers and partners, not "Keep Out." As a result, they set boundaries at the last possible point to keep invaders at bay.

I've done this, by the way, so I know of what I speak. I know how confining this sort of boundary can be. There is no room to move. There is barely room to breathe. The longer this boundary stays in place -- even if no one ever tries to cross it -- the more confined, cramped and edgy those inside the boundary will be.

After working inside this boundary for a while, it is natural to become unbalanced, impatient, cranky, even resentful. It is uncomfortable inside this boundary, and it feels as though this is the fault of those pushy customers, colleagues, and vendors out there. After all, if it weren't for THEM, you'd be out in the fresh air.

But wait -- a client is not an invader. A vendor is not a spy. A business is not a castle on a hill, placed there for strategic advantage against enemy forces. Let's take a big breath and take another look at this business of setting boundaries.

What if boundaries were not last-ditch protections against marauders? What if you set them so that they were lovely, sturdy fences defining a spacious and resource-rich territory in which you can do your best work and enjoy your life at the same time? What if boundaries created a pasture rather than enclosing a cell?

Further, what if boundaries were designed to let in light and air? What if you could see out and others could see in? Working inside of these boundaries is quite a different experience. For one thing, there is plenty of room to move. When someone approaches your boundary, you have lots of choices about how to respond.

Maintaining these healthy boundaries feels entirely different, too. With what pride of ownership and delight in the scope of our pasture we walk the fence line. How pleasing it is to oil the latches on the gates, to replace broken posts, to trim the hedges.

Check in with your boundaries this week. First, notice what constitute the fence posts and gates in your business. Are they the hours that you work? The rates you charge? The terms you offer for special services? Get familiar with the structural elements you can use to build your beautiful fence and gate.

When you have identified those elements, look at where you have set them. Do your rates give you room to do your best work? Do your working arrangements give you breathing space? Examine your boundaries, and notice if they are giving you room to live and to do your best work or cramping your style. Experiment with moving your boundaries out a bit, not to keep your customers away, but to create a bigger space from which you can serve them wholeheartedly and well, maintaining a healthy work life balance.

* * *

Read more Molly Gordon's articles on work life balance written to help you change course without abandoning the destination and restore your equilibrium. Find out how you can improve your resilience and your hopefulness by acquiring solid positive thinking skills.

Related Articles
  Work Life Balance: Calling Your Energy Home
  Setting Boundaries
  Top 5 reasons to mix personal with business
  Work Life Balance: The Gift Of Too Much To Do
  Entrepreneurs Burnout – Bin It

Article Tags:



Related Forum Posts
Re: Sources of Cash - Thanks for the help. The items will be recorded in the Balance Sheet. But why does the Balance Sheet always balances. Is there a specific reason
The Second Life Platform - Greetings! I'm not sure how many of you have heard of or are sensitive to Second Life and its related entities. However, Second Life is a fantastic platform to mimmick real life business operations in a real currency based economy. There are plenty of successful stories for creative individuals, but I'd highly suggest doing your research and appreciating Second Life for what it is, and what it isn't.
Re: The Second Life Platform - [quote="JBunion":fhe23fsu]Greetings! I'm not sure how many of you have heard of or are sensitive to Second Life and its related entities. However, Second Life is a fantastic platform to mimmick real life business operations in a real currency based economy. There are plenty of successful stories for creative individuals, but I'd highly suggest doing your research and appreciating Second Life for what it is, and what it isn't.[/quote:fhe23fsu] Hi JBunion, I've heard about the site. So are you currently a member? And more importantly, have you tried to open a store front in that virtual world?
Re: Balancing Your Man & Business - One issue is the same women face with little kids, if they run home based businesses. If you work out of your home, your man, or your kids, think you don't really work, and its okay to interrupt because it's "only them." But it actually is a major distraction to try to be doing some creative work and having your family coming at you all the time. Boundaries for home workers need to be set, and no guilting them out of it!
Re: Charge what you're worth - [quote="Tami Szabo":292ze3jd]People will pay you what you ask. Very few will ever up the price. You are the one who decided what you are worth. The key is that we believe our services are worth the price we are asking.[/quote:292ze3jd] Hi Tami, You're absolutely right. In "Think and Grow Rich", Jessie B. Rittenhouse says "For Life is a just employer, He gives you what you ask, But once you have set the wages, Why, you must bear the task. I worked for a menial's hire Only to learn, dismayed , That any wage I had asked of Life, Life would have willingly paid" (Napoleon Hill 35). I think the same can be said when setting prices on eBay or Craigslist, especially when people are trying to haggle you.


Share this article with your friends. Fund someone's dream.

Leave a comment below or share on the left and you'll help support entrepreneurs in Africa through our partnership with Kiva. Over $50,000 raised and counting - Please keep sharing! Learn more.

Tweet

Newsletter

Get advice & tips from famous business
owners, new articles by entrepreneur
experts, my latest website updates, &
special sneak peaks at what's to come!

Name:
Email:

Popular Articles

What should your free giveaway be?

3 Health Insurance Misconceptions

Igniting Your Unstoppable Business Destiny

Suggestions

Email us your ideas on how to make our
website more valuable! Thank you Sharon
from Toronto Salsa Lessons / Classes for
your suggestions to make the newsletter
look like the website and profile younger
entrepreneurs like Jennifer Lopez.