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Not Having All the Answers...or Any For That Matter!
| Guest post by: Donna Karlin |
Article Overview: Are you so wrapped up in your chaotic day that you forget to pay attention to your learning curve and what's possible for you in the world?
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Free Download - Memorable Advice By Donna Karlin |
Not Having All the Answers...or Any For That Matter!
As long as I hold onto who I am right now, I won't be able to grow into who I might become.
Mondays, when I'm not working with a client, I spend a good chunk of my day handling administrivia, writing, doing paperwork, and wading through that special file I keep of "seed thoughts", ideas, and reminders to add to, create or morph a program or concept. There is also this file I keep of emails that I parked because I know I need a lot of thinking time to process them. Mondays are when I schedule that time in.
This morning I came across an email exchange I had with a colleague way back when. We had been talking about learning through the process of coaching, not just learning the business of coaching, or through class material, conferences or seminars. Coaches should learn from their clients daily....increasing our awareness of who we are as individuals and professionals.
I remember writing her in response to a comment she made about my work. I shared the following: "What was amazing was how much I learn when I'm Shadow Coaching. I see and learn about things I never knew existed. But even more than that, the feedback I got this afternoon showed how many levels I work on with my clients when I'm on the scene. That's what amazed me the most. This client told me how I also helped him change in a 'holistic way'. That blew ME away. I wonder how many coaches are so wrapped up with coaching that they can forget they're students at the same time? It doesn't make us any less effective. Quite the opposite. It helps our clients realise the depth of their knowledge when we share how much we've also learned in the process. It's a true collaborative partnership".
"Her response was "That's why you're so go damn good at what you do Sherlock! I learn tons from you and also keep you in my mind when I'm consulting and not sure what to do."
So of course (as I often do) I took away the question "How is this applicable to my clients worlds as well? And I ask you, how is this applicable to yours?" Are you so busy in your chaotic worlds that you forget you're students of the world and can grow, learn and evolve every day?
Sometimes we need 'permission' to admit we don't have all the answers but that in itself leads to a fact finding, and a collaborative learning curve. My clients are all unique individuals. Why would I even presume to use one methodology or answer for all of them? Why do organizational leaders think all people should be led in the same way or that one solution fixes all?
How does the saying go? "It's a very stupid man who believes he has all the answers". Something like that?
One way I let go of who I am right now to become the person I may be in the future is by asking one question at a time, then paying attention to whatever unfolds without having the need to control what that might be. That just might be what it means to live in the questions. Maybe that's what leaders need to do more of....live in the questions and not presume to have all the answers, at least right now.
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Article Tags: chunk, class material, collaborative partnership, colleague, conferences, email exchange, paperwork, reminders, seed thoughts, seminars, sherlock, thinking time
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About the Author: Donna Karlin RSS for Donna's articles - Visit Donna's website Donna is an author, speaker and lectures internationally. Her work has been written up in Fast Company Magazine, The National Post, The Globe and Mail, The New York Times, The Boston Globe, and Personal Success Magazine. Her blog Perspectives™ is avidly read by subscribers from 144 countries and she has currently authored and released the book Leaders: Their Stories, Their Words. She is a SupporTED coach, on the team that coaches TED fellows, is Past President and current Dean of the International Consortium for Coaching in Organizations and a member of the Advisory Council for International Adademy for Behavioral Medicine, Counseling and Psychotherapy She has a proven track record in developing sustainable leadership. For tips on how to choose a coach click here Click here to visit Donna's website  
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