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Always isn’t every time

Guest post by: Howard Miller

Article Overview: As a manager, do you and your employees have miscommunications?

Always isn’t every time

How do you interpret it when someone says they always do something?

To demonstrate how easy it is to misinterpret communications I do an exercise in my management skills workshops.

I have everyone write down common words we all use, such as frequently, occasionally, never and always.

I then have them put a number next to each word, from 0 to 100. This number represents the percentage of what they feel the word means.

Naturally, there are a lot of numbers and ranges for words such as frequently and occasionally.

But when I first did this exercise I wrote down 100% for always and 0% for never.

My logic told me if someone says always it means all the time, therefore 100%. And if someone says never they mean not at all, which interprets to 0%.

I was initially surprised when people did not share my logic. Now I know people will not share my logic.

I have done this exercise several hundred times.

I NEVER had every single person pick 100% for always or 0% for never.

And I mean that literally!

People's interpretations of these words have to do with their experiences such as broken promises from others. So they don't take what people say at face value.

What this shows me is how easy it is to have miscommunications. If we interpret the so called easy words how do we manage the more complex?!

When and if I recall how easy it is to interpret everything said:

• I tried to talk in specifics
• I have the other person repeat back what was said even if it seems obvious
• I ask the other person to clarify what they are saying more often if I don't understand or think it could lead to misinterpretation

Miscommunication leads to lack of understanding which leads to frustration. Taking the time to clear it up could take seconds and save hours!

Not always, but sometimes!

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Article Tags: absenteeism, acronyms, always, asking questions, behavior, behavior assessment, Change management, coaching, colloquialisms, communications, conflict, conflict resolution, dealing with difficult people, dealing with difficult situations, difficult personalities, DiSC, do as I say not as I do, effective questions, facebook, facts, fair, fairness, focus, gen x, gen y, generational differences, glass half empty, glass half full, how to deal with difficult people, humor, leadership, listening, management, management skills, management skills for new managers, miscommunication, motivation, never, new managers, objective vs subjective, opportunities, optimism, personality, powerful questions, questions, shift, sometimes, time management



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