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If you don’t know what you need, why are you talking about it?
| Guest post by: Howard Miller |
Article Overview: A common trap and pitfall for managers to avoid
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Free Download - Jumping to Conclusions By Howard Miller |
If you don’t know what you need, why are you talking about it?
Do you ever want something different from your employees, but aren't sure exactly what?!
If you don't know what you need, why are you talking about it?
I have talked with several frustrated managers. They are irritated and/or aggravated by some of their direct reports.
This is for a variety of reasons, from a perceived lack of employee motivation to feeling the employee is downright lazy.
The issue which is universal is when it comes time for the manager to talk to the employee.
When it comes to telling the reports what they need, they have trouble articulating what they need.
If you don't know what you need, then you shouldn't be talking to your reports about the issue or situation!
If you are giving feedback to someone, especially if its feedback to help them improve or change, you need to be able to express what you need.
It needs to be easy to understand and not up to interpretation.
First two words you say when you express what you need:
I need
Not I would really like you to or I want you to
But
I need
If you aren't certain about what you need wait until you know to have a conversation.
It's okay to need to vent, or not be sure of what you need. This only means that what you need is further understanding. Be clear that's what you need when you talk to them
When we express what we need in a way which is easy to understand and not up to interpretation:
- We have thought before we have spoken
We are taking the time to look at the situation
We might get what we need! What do you need that you aren't getting from your employers, peers or others?
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About the Author: Howard Miller RSS for Howard's articles - Visit Howard's website Howard Miller teaches management skills to new managers, seasoned managers, entrepreneurs and executives. He is on the faculty of AMA (American Management Association) and teaches courses including Skills for New Managers, Increasing Managerial Effectiveness, and Successfully Managing People). Topics include delegation and motivation methodologies, conflict, how to deal with difficult people, understanding values and behavior, feedback and listening skills. Clients include mid-range to large companies such as the IRS, Blue Cross Blue Shield, IBM, state government, public school districts, and non profit organizations. Howard also does executive and business coaching with the Ken Blanchard organization. Howard is the author of two book; You're Full of Shift, which contains short stories which demonstrate shifting difficult situations to opportunities and The Manager Trap: 13 ½ Pitfalls to Avoid which showcases common traps and pitfalls managers fall into including using a 4 letter word beginning with F that they should avoid! Click here to visit Howard's website   Gen X Gen Y Gen whatever Jumping to Conclusions Youre an S If you dont know what you need why are you talking about it Not listening can be catastrophic |
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