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Words That Evoke Resistance

Written by: Jeanna Gabellini

Article Overview: It has come to my attention, more than once, that most people state their intentions with somewhat of an "I hope this happens" kind of feeling behind their words. When I am asking a client what their intention is (or said another way, "What is the desired outcome?"), I'm really wanting to know what they are committed to having happen. I do not want them to wonder if it will or won't happen, I want them to expect it to happen.

Words That Evoke Resistance

It has come to my attention, more than once, that most people state their intentions with somewhat of an "I hope this happens" kind of feeling behind their words. When I am asking a client what their intention is (or said another way, "What is the desired outcome?"), I'm really wanting to know what they are committed to having happen. I do not want them to wonder if it will or won't happen, I want them to expect it to happen.

No matter how much I remind people that an intention is not a wish, there is still a level of "wishing" that happens. They are not 100% trusting that by setting an intention, believing it to be so, and taking actions that support that belief, they will get exactly what they want -- or even better. But when I ask, "What are you committed to having in your life?" a current of resistance starts flowing. The word commitment stirs up feelings of responsibility, have-to, and fear of not being able to "make" it happen. In order to have them successfully stop wishing, clients have to create a new relationship with the word commitment itself.

I see commitment as a word that evokes power in me. If I am committed, I have made a decision to experience or have something in particular. I also use the word to see where my believability factor is about a certain topic. I ask myself, "Am I committed to attracting $1,000,000 in the next week?" "Uh, no," would mean I don't believe this is possible at all from my current state of mind. Then I ask, "If not $1,000,000, what am I committed to experiencing in the next week?" Whatever the answer is, I have now made a conscious decision to experience it. It gives me a sense of peace and excitement to know what I have chosen. It's not a matter of "if" it will happen. The only thing that is unknown is the "how" I will attract it. Although, sometimes I know exactly how I will get a desire. Either way, it's a done deal.

What comes up for you when you hear the word selfish? As in, you're being selfish! Or how about the word sales? Or business plan? Or staff meeting? Over the past decade, I've noticed that a majority of people who seek my services have a negative emotional charge when these words are mentioned as something that we will be addressing. Any word that pushes your button is a gift. It is well worth your time to explore the meaning you've attached to the word.

For instance, selfishness is looked upon as unworldly way to be. Ha! Nothing could be farther from the truth. We are all selfish ALL the time. Every single thing we do, whether we like it or not, we do because we will gain something by it. Even the child who takes out the trash because his parents tell him to, against his choice, is doing it so that he will either get approval or to avoid listening to the griping parent. He gets something out of it. I give gifts to others out of pure selfishness. I like to see the receiver smile or make life a little easier. This gives me great joy. I do it for my own joy. I change a baby's diapers for me! It would make me sad to smell their dirty diaper and to know they are feeling uncomfortable. So, get over not wanting to be selfish. We all are!

Being able to get your charge off a word will create more expansion in your life. You have more access to joy when you can hear any word and not get a charge off it. There are four letter words that used to instantly cause me heartache if I heard them, even if they weren't aimed at me. I've done some poking around my mind and finally am at a place where they are simply words to me. Every word is vulnerable to interpretation. It is only the meaning we give to something that makes it joyful or harmful.

In a recent mastermind call with my business partner, I dubbed myself the Ultimate Lover. Now I'm sure that if I asked a hundred people what they thought that meant, they'd have many different meanings. Again, everything is subject to interpretation. What I did mean by it is that it is my commitment to look through the eyes of love. When I find myself frustrated at another person, I will step into a loving place in my mind before responding. It feels better for me to do this than making up all kinds of reasons why the other person is wrong.

Enjoy your new relationship with highly charged words!

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Article Tags: belief, busi, conscious decision, current state, desire, desired outcome, excitement, fear, feelings, intention, peace, relationship, resistance, word sales



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