Living Life On Your Terms
I recently heard a touching story about a person most people would see as extremely successful. He has an international reputation, has made tons of money, been interviewed as an expert on national television, has a beautiful family, and lives what most of us would call "the good life". Except that he "feels like a fraud."
As I heard the details of his story, it was clear that he has "done all the right things, collected all the blue ribbons and jumped through the hoops", but he has not figured out how to live a life
that is truly his own.
Later, I recalled something I heard about a definition of success a teenage girl once gave. It was during a discussion of a group of middle-school kids and after all the comments that success was
about money or power or fame, one girl quietly said, "I think success is living your life the way you want to." For her, success was not about popularity or sports or good grades. It was choosing her values, setting her goals, and living a life that satisfied her.
At age 15, she already understood that no one could deny her the ultimate success of living well and enjoying "a life of one's own".
As the story of the 40-something entrepreneur unfolded, it became clear that he has never "gotten" that. In some ways, he is still trying to please other people, trying to be popular, trying to win first prize. For all of his money, fame and power, he is not successful in his own eyes.
Success is living your own life. Success, with a small "s", is winning a prize, getting the promotion, making more money, or having a bigger house. Achieving those things is important and
worthwhile, but only so long as we understand they only lead to "success", and rarely to success!
Many of the people who contact me for coaching - not all, but many - are discovering that being the most popular kid in school is not enough. I suspect the rise and fall of the stock market in recent years has permitted many people to have far more "success" than they expected, to lose much of it, and to discover that neither success nor loss are as satisfying as they expected. That leads to the obvious question, "Is that all there is?"
The answer has always been right in front of us. Success is not about allowing peer pressure to tell us how to dress, how to dance, what music to listen to, or later in life, what car to drive.
Success, with a capital "S", is living our own life, in our own way, consistent with our values. It is about choosing our priorities, doing things that are meaningful and important, about staying the course, finishing what we set out to do, and making a difference in the world.
Highly success people have always known that in the end, success is about following your heart, living with passion, loving people and making a difference. Some do this by building a business, or by creating art or music. Some do it in politics or education. Some seek cures for the world's diseases or to help cultures understand each other and live together in peace.
The keys to achievement, motivation and ultimate success are in our own heart. As Tony Robbins has said, people are not lazy, they just have inadequate, hollow or uninspiring goals. Find the goals that truly inspire, challenge and excite you, then stay up all night and work all day to achieve your destiny. Success is not something to be chased, it's something to be celebrated by living
our own life, on our own terms, every day.
Living Life On Your Terms - To learn more about this author, visit Rodger Blaker's Website.
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Cheryl MatthynssensCheryl is a life skills coach, licensed Chemical Dependency Counselor and a 20 year entrepreneur. Cheryl's dedication to achieving a life of balance led to her expanding her teaching from the simple managing of life's daily challenges to adding financial well being as well. A direct marketer with DrinkACT, she is gaining ground in the online community with her concepts of making sure business owners, entreprenuers and employees have well rounded life styles. She opened up a small affiliate site - The Balance Guide- to help others find resources for mental and emotional well being. Visit Cheryl's blog to see more of the diversity beyond business she has began offering online at www.thebalanceguide.blogspot.com - Visit Cheryl Matthynssens's Website |
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Dave KurlanDave Kurlan is the founder and CEO of Objective Management Group, Inc., the industry leader in sales assessments and sales force evaluations, and the CEO of David Kurlan & Associates, Inc., a consulting firm specializing in sales force development. Dave has been a top rated speaker at Inc. Magazine's Conference on Growing the Company, the Sales & Marketing Management Conference and the Gazelles Sales & Marketing Summit. He has been featured on radio and TV, including World Business Review with General Norman Schwarzkopf, in Inc. Magazine, Selling Power Magazine, Sales & Marketing Management Magazine and Incentive Magazine. He is the author of Mindless Selling and Baseline Selling – How to Become a Sales Superstar by Using What You Already Know about the Game of Baseball. He created and wrote STAR, a proprietary recruiting process for hiring great salespeople, and he writes Understanding the Sales Force, a popular business Blog and is a contributing author to The Death of 20th Century Selling and 101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life, Volume 2. - Visit Dave Kurlan's Website |
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George LudwigGeorge Ludwig is a recognized authority on sales strategy and peak performance psychology. An international speaker, trainer, and corporate consultant, he helps clients like Johnson & Johnson, Abbott Laboratories, Northwestern Mutual, CIGNA, and numerous others improve sales force effectiveness and performance. Though it's George's strategies and processes that help corporations increase productivity and performance, it's his tremendous energy and dynamism that spark the transformation. Again and again, clients remark on his amazing ability to unleash human capacity and inspire men and women to break out of their comfort zones. The result is a whole new type of salesperson. His customized presentations teach achievers to make stunning advances in their lives. From helping salespeople realize cherished dreams to helping corporations exponentially accelerate revenue streams, George Ludwig leaves audiences and individuals empowered, emboldened, and clamoring for more. George is the best-selling author of Power Selling: Seven Strategies for Cracking the Sales Code and Wise Moves: 60 Quick Tips to Improve Your Position in Life & Business. - Visit George Ludwig's Website |
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