One Small Step At A Time

One of the most common challenges clients bring to coaching is the question of how to achieve their most important goals. They have important personal or business goals but they are not achieving them, and in fact, they often tell me they are not even getting started. How to help them?

There are many possible reasons for this, of course, but the reasons "why" are rarely important. Who cares "why" we don't make progress? The key is to find a SOLUTION and start moving forward. Here are three common solutions:

1. Clarify the REAL desire.

Clients often assume that a coach will be a huge fan of "goal setting" and are surprised to learn that I'm actually rather suspicious of most goal-setting programs. Now, obviously having clear goals is a good thing but most people spend far too much time setting false goals.

We've all done it. It's New Year's, and we "have to" create some targets for the coming year. Or, the boss sends us to a "motivational seminar" and we are told to come back with a set of written goals, so we do what we're told. Or, to pick on some other common themes, we know we "should" lose weight, quit smoking or spend less, so we set that as a "goal". No wonder we fail!

Those are NOT true goals! Those are merely exercises to sooth our boss, our spouse or our conscience!

The solution is obvious: Define what you REALLY want and set THAT as your goal. Most people are actually pretty good at achieving goals IF the goal is realistic, IF they have a clear plan, and IF they really, really want it.

2. Create a SYSTEM for achievement.

Weight Watchers(tm), Alcoholic Anonymous and other support groups work because they create an environment where we are supported and encouraged to succeed, every step of the way.

Too many people set goals and try to achieve them in isolation. Human beings are social creatures and we do our best when our friends are cheering us on, offering support, giving advice and making it easy for us to succeed.

Surround yourself with people, posters, music, tools and models that make it easier to succeed than to fail! Arrange your life and social situations so that every thing around you (your "Eco-system") pulls your forward! There are coaching models on how to create an environment that pulls you forward instead of feeling as if you must constantly find ways to push yourself forward 3. Take SMALL steps.

Too often we try to take giant leaps, when we are far more likely to get to the top of the mountain in a series of small, incremental steps.

Giant leaps are fun and dramatic, but they can also be up-setting. They change our world and confuse people. That's one reason many people, after losing weight in a hurry, gain it back just as quickly. They've changed "who they are", including their body image, their ward-robe, diet and lifestyle, and the brain naturally misses the old, familiar patterns.

The wisdom of experience tells us to slow down and take smaller steps.

Today, take one small step in the direction you want to go. Save a dollar, if saving money is one of your goals. Skip desert if losing weight is a goal. Compliment your spouse if you want a closer, more loving relationship.

Take small steps, but take them every single day. Take the smallest, safest, easiest step you can, but keep moving in the direction you want to go. If you like the results simply do it again tomorrow, and the day after that, and again the day after that. To achieve great things, keep walking, one step at a time, in the direction of your goal.

One Small Step At A Time - To learn more about this author, visit Rodger Blaker's Website.

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