Four Steps to Achieving Balance
Four Steps to Achieving Balance
Step I: What IS balance? If your life was balanced, how would it be different than what you have right now? What things would you be doing and how will you be different? The fact is, when your life is balanced you will behave differently, you’ll treat your time differently, and you’ll feel differently. By envisioning how you will be and how your life will be different, you start to create the vision in your mind of your ideal life. From here, you can begin to turn your dream into reality.
Take an assessment of your current state of affairs. To do this, use the Wheel of Life which asks you to rate the level of satisfaction in every area of your life: career, finances, environment, fun, personal development, health and fitness, spiritual renewal, and relationships. Increasing your awareness of your satisfaction in these areas helps by giving you a starting point for change. What would it be like to increase your satisfaction by just one or two points in an area? What action steps can you take this week to improve your conditions and move toward your dream?
Step II: What do you value? Knowing what’s most important to you can help you make good decisions especially in moments of stress, and in challenging or demanding situations. What you do in any given moment is a reflection of what you value most. For example, when you argue with your spouse, what is of greatest value to you: this person who you love or your agenda, being heard, or being right? When you are frustrated with traffic, stressed about an upcoming meeting, or overwhelmed with too much to do, you are valuing something over yourself and your well-being. It could be that you are accustomed to pain or drama and you behave in certain ways out of habit in order to maintain or recreate these highly charged emotional states.
Have you ever set out of change something or approach a situation differently but find yourself doing things the same way you always do? This is due to deep seated thought and emotional patterns. You will continue to do what you’ve always done because it’s how you are wired. In order to change you need to “rewire” neurological pathways in your brain. That’s why it can be so difficult to maintain a diet, or use behavior modification techniques in order to create change. They are hard and require a lot of effort! Most people cannot sustain the change because unless you rewire the brain through a change in thought patterns, you will revert back to the habits you created long ago.
Being clear about what you value the most sets the groundwork for change because if you value something other than the way you live today, then you are more willing to do the work in order to have your life and actions reflect your values.
Step III: Identify and eliminate the barriers to balance. Barriers can be anything that gets in the way of your living as you wish: fears, self-doubt, people pleasing, holding onto past hurts by not forgiving self or others, future worries, concerns over what other people think/do/feel, poor self-esteem, lack of self-confidence. The one thing to note about barriers is that they are ALL internal, which means YOU have the power to overcome them. Change requires that you let go of things that will not fit into your vision for success. What might you need to let go of in order to embrace a life that’s balanced? For example, if you are used to doing a lot for others, you might have to start saying “no” to requests that take up time but do not add value to your life. To be able to turn down these requests, you’ll need to examine why you feel compelled to put others before you. What do you gain? Do you have a need to feel important or a need to be needed? If so, you must work through these emotional needs before you’ll be able to create change that feels good for you. Perhaps the issue is more about what the person will do or say if you don’t do as they have asked. What are you afraid of? Get to the root of the issue and you’ll be able to move beyond it for good.
Giving up chaos and overwhelm for peace and a slower pace may sound like heaven but is new and different from what you are used to; it will take time to adjust to downshifting. As a society, we are taught to become human doings. You take on more and more responsibility, you create unrealistic expectations about how things and people (including you) should be, and this sets you up for overwhelm and dissatisfaction. You do too much, spend precious time trying to control things over which you have no control, and force yourself to live up to unreasonable expectations of perfectionism. Learning to become a human being starts with putting self-care at the top of your list along with integrity. By uncovering areas of dissatisfaction and fears, you can start to overcome them and build inner strength and self-esteem to gain control of you and your life. There is no greater gift you can give yourself or others than focusing on your own personal development. Eliminating the barriers that keep you from achieving greater success and happiness is an important part of the work. It will feel so good to lighten your load, decrease your stress, and have more time to do things you love that you’ll wonder why you waited so long and put up with so much!
Start by identifying the top five things that, if different, would improve the quality of your life dramatically. Be honest with yourself. It’s time to get out of your own path to happiness!
Step IV: As Og Mandino writes in The Greatest Salesman in the World, “I will live this day as if it is my last.” Don’t let another day go by procrastinating, feeling bad about yourself, giving yourself a hard time, or worrying about the future. It’s easy to forget the brevity and fragility of life until someone close gets sick or dies, which serves as a very potent reminder. It’s easy to get caught up in the minutia of the moment, live in crisis mode, and forget that what is most important is this moment and how you are enjoying it. Ask yourself frequently: How important is what you’re doing in the scheme of things? This day is all you have to make your mark on the world. How do you want to spend it? Do you curse at the guy who just cut you off in traffic, or scream at your child for interrupting you yet again? Do you go to work and go about your business with a smile or do you complain and blame others for your lot in life? Just for today, you can be in control of your thoughts, your actions, and your choices. Just for today, you can choose to be fully present and engaged so you can squeeze every ounce of joy out of each moment. Today is all you have! When you remember this, you won’t put things off that are important to you, you will tolerate less nonsense because there’s no time for it, and you’ll focus your energies, time, and resources on what you value most. Each day you strive for to enjoy more of life eliminating the barriers to success, and excellence reaches new heights and you live in gratitude for what you are able to give today.
Four Steps to Achieving Balance - To learn more about this author, visit Julie Fuimano's Website.
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Do you wish you had more time to do the things you like to do? Do you find yourself juggling too many things, wishing you could get off the merry-go-round? This can feel like such a powerless place to be. Many people talk about wanting balance but do you know how to achieve it? Let’s look at four steps to achieving balance.
Step I: What IS balance? If your life was balanced, how would it be different than what you have right now? What things would you be doing and how will you be different? The fact is, when your life is balanced you will behave differently, you’ll treat your time differently, and you’ll feel differently. By envisioning how you will be and how your life will be different, you start to create the vision in your mind of your ideal life. From here, you can begin to turn your dream into reality.
Take an assessment of your current state of affairs. To do this, use the Wheel of Life which asks you to rate the level of satisfaction in every area of your life: career, finances, environment, fun, personal development, health and fitness, spiritual renewal, and relationships. Increasing your awareness of your satisfaction in these areas helps by giving you a starting point for change. What would it be like to increase your satisfaction by just one or two points in an area? What action steps can you take this week to improve your conditions and move toward your dream?
Step II: What do you value? Knowing what’s most important to you can help you make good decisions especially in moments of stress, and in challenging or demanding situations. What you do in any given moment is a reflection of what you value most. For example, when you argue with your spouse, what is of greatest value to you: this person who you love or your agenda, being heard, or being right? When you are frustrated with traffic, stressed about an upcoming meeting, or overwhelmed with too much to do, you are valuing something over yourself and your well-being. It could be that you are accustomed to pain or drama and you behave in certain ways out of habit in order to maintain or recreate these highly charged emotional states.
Have you ever set out of change something or approach a situation differently but find yourself doing things the same way you always do? This is due to deep seated thought and emotional patterns. You will continue to do what you’ve always done because it’s how you are wired. In order to change you need to “rewire” neurological pathways in your brain. That’s why it can be so difficult to maintain a diet, or use behavior modification techniques in order to create change. They are hard and require a lot of effort! Most people cannot sustain the change because unless you rewire the brain through a change in thought patterns, you will revert back to the habits you created long ago.
Being clear about what you value the most sets the groundwork for change because if you value something other than the way you live today, then you are more willing to do the work in order to have your life and actions reflect your values.
Step III: Identify and eliminate the barriers to balance. Barriers can be anything that gets in the way of your living as you wish: fears, self-doubt, people pleasing, holding onto past hurts by not forgiving self or others, future worries, concerns over what other people think/do/feel, poor self-esteem, lack of self-confidence. The one thing to note about barriers is that they are ALL internal, which means YOU have the power to overcome them. Change requires that you let go of things that will not fit into your vision for success. What might you need to let go of in order to embrace a life that’s balanced? For example, if you are used to doing a lot for others, you might have to start saying “no” to requests that take up time but do not add value to your life. To be able to turn down these requests, you’ll need to examine why you feel compelled to put others before you. What do you gain? Do you have a need to feel important or a need to be needed? If so, you must work through these emotional needs before you’ll be able to create change that feels good for you. Perhaps the issue is more about what the person will do or say if you don’t do as they have asked. What are you afraid of? Get to the root of the issue and you’ll be able to move beyond it for good.
Giving up chaos and overwhelm for peace and a slower pace may sound like heaven but is new and different from what you are used to; it will take time to adjust to downshifting. As a society, we are taught to become human doings. You take on more and more responsibility, you create unrealistic expectations about how things and people (including you) should be, and this sets you up for overwhelm and dissatisfaction. You do too much, spend precious time trying to control things over which you have no control, and force yourself to live up to unreasonable expectations of perfectionism. Learning to become a human being starts with putting self-care at the top of your list along with integrity. By uncovering areas of dissatisfaction and fears, you can start to overcome them and build inner strength and self-esteem to gain control of you and your life. There is no greater gift you can give yourself or others than focusing on your own personal development. Eliminating the barriers that keep you from achieving greater success and happiness is an important part of the work. It will feel so good to lighten your load, decrease your stress, and have more time to do things you love that you’ll wonder why you waited so long and put up with so much!
Start by identifying the top five things that, if different, would improve the quality of your life dramatically. Be honest with yourself. It’s time to get out of your own path to happiness!
Step IV: As Og Mandino writes in The Greatest Salesman in the World, “I will live this day as if it is my last.” Don’t let another day go by procrastinating, feeling bad about yourself, giving yourself a hard time, or worrying about the future. It’s easy to forget the brevity and fragility of life until someone close gets sick or dies, which serves as a very potent reminder. It’s easy to get caught up in the minutia of the moment, live in crisis mode, and forget that what is most important is this moment and how you are enjoying it. Ask yourself frequently: How important is what you’re doing in the scheme of things? This day is all you have to make your mark on the world. How do you want to spend it? Do you curse at the guy who just cut you off in traffic, or scream at your child for interrupting you yet again? Do you go to work and go about your business with a smile or do you complain and blame others for your lot in life? Just for today, you can be in control of your thoughts, your actions, and your choices. Just for today, you can choose to be fully present and engaged so you can squeeze every ounce of joy out of each moment. Today is all you have! When you remember this, you won’t put things off that are important to you, you will tolerate less nonsense because there’s no time for it, and you’ll focus your energies, time, and resources on what you value most. Each day you strive for to enjoy more of life eliminating the barriers to success, and excellence reaches new heights and you live in gratitude for what you are able to give today.
Four Steps to Achieving Balance - To learn more about this author, visit Julie Fuimano's Website.
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Cheryl MatthynssensCheryl is a life skills coach, licensed Chemical Dependency Counselor and a 20 year entrepreneur. Cheryl's dedication to achieving a life of balance led to her expanding her teaching from the simple managing of life's daily challenges to adding financial well being as well. A direct marketer with DrinkACT, she is gaining ground in the online community with her concepts of making sure business owners, entreprenuers and employees have well rounded life styles. She opened up a small affiliate site - The Balance Guide- to help others find resources for mental and emotional well being. Visit Cheryl's blog to see more of the diversity beyond business she has began offering online at www.thebalanceguide.blogspot.com - Visit Cheryl Matthynssens's Website |
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