It is prevalent in our society to title projects, programs, and even our personal goals using the word “anti”, “quit”, or “stop” along with the very word that we want to eliminate such as “anti-drug” or “anti-violence”. Language has an extraordinarily powerful impact. And we know that the brain only ‘hears’ positives. We also know by the Law of Attraction that what we think about we bring about. The word chosen for your title or goal is what you focus on and make more of. These negative titles hurt you by keeping your attention on the very thing you want to eradicate.
“Anti-Violence.” “Anti-Drug.” “Anti-War.”
In these cases, the mind only hears the words ‘violence’, ‘drug’, ‘war’ which is where our attention focuses, hence, we bring about more of the same.
“Quit Smoking.” “Stop Drinking.” “Stop Bullying.” “Stop Road Rage.”
In order to truly ‘stop’ or ‘quit’ anything, you must become the opposite; for example, in order to truly stop smoking, you must change your identity and become a non-smoker or someone who loves and appreciates their health and lungs.
And one more – “Lose Weight.”
You never want to choose a goal that focuses your attention on losing anything. Language your goals based on what you want to gain such as health, fitness, strength, or endurance. Then you can use weight or pant size as a measure for your success.
If we want to make real and sustainable change, then we must focus our attention on languaging and creating the very thing we DO want, not what we don’t want.
So what do you want? You want peace? Create peace programs. Mother Theresa said that she would not attend Anti-War rally; but call it a Peace Rally and she’d be there. Focus all of your energies on peace; teach people how to live peacefully and in harmony with each other, with themselves, and with the earth. People focus on violence because that’s what they know. They know how to be angry and they don’t know what to do with that anger. Teach them how to love – first themselves – and then they will learn to love others. Who do you know that truly loves themselves, takes good care of themselves, and honors themselves? Do you treat yourself with respect and loving-kindness? Instead of anti-violence campaigns, let’s teach each other how to love.
Love is one of those strange words that people often have difficulty with. It’s just a word. But when we feel loved – truly loved – we feel safe and comforted. We feel connected and part of everything – including the universe. Sometimes, when you’re out in nature, when you are performing a sport or perhaps when you’re with your children, you experience deep feelings of love. Too often we are so busy that we don’t take the time to experience these feelings. And too often, the very experience of deep feelings frightens us because we are not accustomed to feeling so deeply. We don’t know how to experience our feelings or what to do with them when they arise so we get scared and avoid the feelings with busyness.
Love is not something you do; it is a state of being. We are not referring to the egoic love of self-image, stature, or prestige which is shallow and insecure, but rather the love that emanates from within demonstrating a level of acceptance and humanity which allows an individual to shine. If there was more love in the world, if more people knew how to love themselves, to accept themselves and their own humanity, then they would be more loving and accepting of others. There would be less hate, less crime, less hunger, less stress, less loneliness and more forgiveness, more mercy, and more happiness. Love is all we need in order to eliminate all of the antis: drugs, alcoholism, hate, and war.
Hate is love turned inside out. Mix love with some misdirected anger and an inability to handle deep emotions, add judgment, fear, self-pity or jealousy perhaps, and spend your days focused on it, thinking about it, talking about it, dwelling on it, and eventually it grows bigger and bigger until your hate becomes very strong. Hate requires constant refueling and renewing to keep it going. It actually takes a lot of energy to maintain your hate toward something or someone.
The interesting thing is that our spirit knows nothing of hate or anger or fear. It is only through our humanness that we can experience these things. Our spiritual selves know only love, forgiveness, mercy, gratitude.
If we are to make significant and lasting change in the world, then each of us can do our part by focusing on the wonderful and positive things you want to bring into your life. What if you experienced feelings of joy and love every day? Give yourself permission to enjoy the good stuff even when others around you are fixated on how bad or horrible things are; you don’t have to agree with them! A little positive energy goes a long way. Start looking for the good in others and give people compliments. Only participate in constructive conversations. Then find people who are also positive and want more peace, love, joy, and acceptance.
Don’t focus on what you don’t want; only focus on what you do want and watch your language. We have all seen the bumper sticker that reads, “I owe. I owe. It’s off to work I go.” We can probably guess that the owner of the vehicle is in debt and we can predict with the Law of Attraction that if they read that every day, there’s a good probability that they will stay in debt forever.
The other day I saw another bumper sticker. It read, “Think good thoughts.” I think that’s a great suggestion.
The Right Words For Positive Results - To learn more about this author, visit Juli Fuimano's Website.
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Leanne Hoagland Smith
Are you or your business where you want to be? Are you facing constant struggles in business or life in general? Would you like to "unlock" those obstacles keeping you from greater business or personal success? As your results partner, we can work together to unlock those desired results by achieving tomorrow's solutions today. Let’s use your strengths for real change through proven and affordable solutions where the real problems are identified. Are you seeking loyal customers, great attitudes, increased sales, improved profitability or just some sleep filled nights? Then we should talk because my clients have experienced exactly those types of results. Learn more about customer loyalty at http://www.processspec ialist.com/customer-loyalty.htm Give me a call 219.759.5601 for a free strategy session. I look forward to speaking with you. P.S. If you are seeking a motivational speaker, sales trainer or small business expert that will leave your audience smiling and remembering, please feel free to contact me at 219.759.5601. - Visit Leanne Hoagland Smith's Website |
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Juli Fuimano
(Visit Juli's Website)
Julie Fuimano, RN, MBA, CSAC was named one
of the TOP 100 THOUGHT LEADERS in her
field. Your happiness and success is her
business! If you are tired of listening to
the tapes playing in your head and want to
learn some new thoughts for success, then
visit her website www.N
urturingYourSuccess.com to take the
assessment and learn how your inner
dialogue is supporting and sabotaging your
efforts. It’s time to be the master of
your thoughts. If you are involved in
recruitment, retention, staff development
or performance, visit www.Nur
turingYourStaff.com to learn how you
can unlock up to 40% more productivity and
cooperation from your employees and
yourself! The Assessment is the diagnosis;
our coaching is the prescription.
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"You have to be positive every single day. You have to put effort into it daily, because no one else is going to do it for you." 
