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Improve Your Active Listening Skills

Improve Your Active Listening Skills

Listening is one of the most effective communication skills we can learn.

For it to be really effective we must learn to 'actively' listen. Normal everyday listening allows us think about what's being said, form a response, offer a solution or advice. We might just be waiting for them to stop talking so we can say jump in with our own opinion or perspective.

However, listening is about more than what's being said. What are the words being used? What is the tone of voice, what feelings are being expressed? What is the body language of the speaker?

Active listening is about listening to what the person is saying without jumping to any conclusion or interpreting what they're saying according to your own perceptions. When we listen to someone speak, we do so at a number of levels from the superficial 'only half listening' to the total focus of deeper listening.

Superficial - not really there, thoughts or attention are somewhere else and the interest is low. May make the right 'listening' noises, nod and murmur agreement but the person isn't really listening.

Level 1 - What does this mean to me? We hear the words but are using our own interpretation and judgement to decide what it means to me. There may be a need for more information. Someone listening at this level is likely to impose their own opinions and thoughts on the conversation.

Level 2 - This is good for general conversation. The listener is focused on the other person and not what's going on around them. At this level the listener may be leaning forward, head to one side, making appropriate eye contact, shows they are listening. They are aware of the speaker's feelings as well as the words being said. Keeps focus in order to fully understand. Is able to summarise and clarify what's been said.

Level 3 - This is a much deeper level of listening. It's about listening for what's not being said. Using your intuition to truly understand the other person and what they're feeling. The listener is totally focused on the other person and totally unaware of themselves, their thoughts or anything else. This level is used by counsellors, coaches and therapists.


How to improve your listening skills:

Face the person, make appropriate eye contact and nod your head or make appropriate sounds or gestures to show you're listening.

When encouraging someone to talk - don't ask 'closed' questions that simply require a 'Yes or No' answer but ask 'open-ended' questions - how, what, when, where ...?

If you catch yourself being distracted or drifting off in your own thoughts - be honest and apologise to the speaker - "Sorry, I was thinking about what you said earlier, could you repeat what you just said". Focus your attention back on the person in front of you.

Try listening not just with your hearing but with all your other senses. What is the person really saying? Do the words match the tone and energy of the speaker? How do they feel?

Summarise what's been said to you to show you understand.

Be aware that when you listen, you are listening from your own point of view of the world and that your listener may have a different perspective on things. Take your cue from them.

Notice your conversations over the next few days. When are you really listening? What difference do you notice when you change the way you listen.





Improve Your Active Listening Skills - To learn more about this author, visit Clare Evans's Website.

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Anne Barr
Anne Barr has over 26 years experience in sales and marketing, six years as a franchisee. She has assisted over 367 business owners and purchasers to achieve their goals in career change, transition and exit strategy. She holds the designation of Certified Franchise Executive from the International Franchise Association, Certified Business Intermediary from the International Business Brokers Association and Board Certified Broker from the Texas Association of Business Brokers. Anne is active in professional organizations, networking groups and volunteers for non-profit entities. As owner/operator of four successful businesses, Anne has proven people skills and enjoys helping clients find the right "fit" in business ownership. Visit www.FranchiseOpportunitySpecialist.com for more information about me and my company. - Visit Anne Barr's Website

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John has taught keyword research and SEO skills to small groups of business owners and Webmasters from over 80 different countries world wide since 2002. John is also the Director of Search Engine Academy ; Co-director of Training at Search Engine Workshops offering live, SEO Workshops with his partner SEO educator Robin Nobles, author of the very first comprehensive online search engine marketing courses at SEO Training Online and the SEO Workshop Resource Center.
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John Brennan
John Brennan Ed.D. Dr. Brennan is President of Interpersonal Development, LLC, a training and development firm. Interpersonal Development has provided sales training and coaching to more than 3,000 sales reps from over 100 companies. A native of Australia, Dr. Brennan received his doctorate from the University of Rochester. His dissertation researched the effectiveness of Behavioral Modeling Technology in training people in interpersonal skills. While he has spent most of his career designing or delivering training, he was also a Vice-President of Sales of a training and development franchise with operations in 25 markets. Dr. Brennan has designed and delivered sales training in North America, Asia, Europe, Australia and the Middle East. He has been a guest speaker at numerous national and regional professional conferences. When Microsoft wanted Best Practices articles on sales for their web site, they called Dr. Brennan. The results are at http://office.microsoft.com/en-us/FX011387391033.aspx His firm’s clients have included Volvo, The Prudential, Merrill Lynch, Eastman Kodak, Gannett, Equifax Europe, the Economist Group and countless small businesses. - Visit John Brennan's Website

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Clare Evans
(Visit Clare's Website) Author of Time Management (For Dummies) Clare enables busy individuals and small business owners to organise their lives more effectively. You can read more Time Management and Work Life Balance Articles on my site http://www.clareevans.co.uk Receive free Time Tips to Power-up your productivity. Register for her monthly newsletter at www.clareevans.co.uk

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