Improve Your Active Listening Skills
Improve Your Active Listening Skills
For it to be really effective we must learn to 'actively' listen. Normal everyday listening allows us think about what's being said, form a response, offer a solution or advice. We might just be waiting for them to stop talking so we can say jump in with our own opinion or perspective.
However, listening is about more than what's being said. What are the words being used? What is the tone of voice, what feelings are being expressed? What is the body language of the speaker?
Active listening is about listening to what the person is saying without jumping to any conclusion or interpreting what they're saying according to your own perceptions. When we listen to someone speak, we do so at a number of levels from the superficial 'only half listening' to the total focus of deeper listening.
Superficial - not really there, thoughts or attention are somewhere else and the interest is low. May make the right 'listening' noises, nod and murmur agreement but the person isn't really listening.
Level 1 - What does this mean to me? We hear the words but are using our own interpretation and judgement to decide what it means to me. There may be a need for more information. Someone listening at this level is likely to impose their own opinions and thoughts on the conversation.
Level 2 - This is good for general conversation. The listener is focused on the other person and not what's going on around them. At this level the listener may be leaning forward, head to one side, making appropriate eye contact, shows they are listening. They are aware of the speaker's feelings as well as the words being said. Keeps focus in order to fully understand. Is able to summarise and clarify what's been said.
Level 3 - This is a much deeper level of listening. It's about listening for what's not being said. Using your intuition to truly understand the other person and what they're feeling. The listener is totally focused on the other person and totally unaware of themselves, their thoughts or anything else. This level is used by counsellors, coaches and therapists.
How to improve your listening skills:
Face the person, make appropriate eye contact and nod your head or make appropriate sounds or gestures to show you're listening.
When encouraging someone to talk - don't ask 'closed' questions that simply require a 'Yes or No' answer but ask 'open-ended' questions - how, what, when, where ...?
If you catch yourself being distracted or drifting off in your own thoughts - be honest and apologise to the speaker - "Sorry, I was thinking about what you said earlier, could you repeat what you just said". Focus your attention back on the person in front of you.
Try listening not just with your hearing but with all your other senses. What is the person really saying? Do the words match the tone and energy of the speaker? How do they feel?
Summarise what's been said to you to show you understand.
Be aware that when you listen, you are listening from your own point of view of the world and that your listener may have a different perspective on things. Take your cue from them.
Notice your conversations over the next few days. When are you really listening? What difference do you notice when you change the way you listen.
Improve Your Active Listening Skills - To learn more about this author, visit Clare Evans's Website.
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Listening is one of the most effective communication skills we can learn.
For it to be really effective we must learn to 'actively' listen. Normal everyday listening allows us think about what's being said, form a response, offer a solution or advice. We might just be waiting for them to stop talking so we can say jump in with our own opinion or perspective.
However, listening is about more than what's being said. What are the words being used? What is the tone of voice, what feelings are being expressed? What is the body language of the speaker?
Active listening is about listening to what the person is saying without jumping to any conclusion or interpreting what they're saying according to your own perceptions. When we listen to someone speak, we do so at a number of levels from the superficial 'only half listening' to the total focus of deeper listening.
Superficial - not really there, thoughts or attention are somewhere else and the interest is low. May make the right 'listening' noises, nod and murmur agreement but the person isn't really listening.
Level 1 - What does this mean to me? We hear the words but are using our own interpretation and judgement to decide what it means to me. There may be a need for more information. Someone listening at this level is likely to impose their own opinions and thoughts on the conversation.
Level 2 - This is good for general conversation. The listener is focused on the other person and not what's going on around them. At this level the listener may be leaning forward, head to one side, making appropriate eye contact, shows they are listening. They are aware of the speaker's feelings as well as the words being said. Keeps focus in order to fully understand. Is able to summarise and clarify what's been said.
Level 3 - This is a much deeper level of listening. It's about listening for what's not being said. Using your intuition to truly understand the other person and what they're feeling. The listener is totally focused on the other person and totally unaware of themselves, their thoughts or anything else. This level is used by counsellors, coaches and therapists.
How to improve your listening skills:
Face the person, make appropriate eye contact and nod your head or make appropriate sounds or gestures to show you're listening.
When encouraging someone to talk - don't ask 'closed' questions that simply require a 'Yes or No' answer but ask 'open-ended' questions - how, what, when, where ...?
If you catch yourself being distracted or drifting off in your own thoughts - be honest and apologise to the speaker - "Sorry, I was thinking about what you said earlier, could you repeat what you just said". Focus your attention back on the person in front of you.
Try listening not just with your hearing but with all your other senses. What is the person really saying? Do the words match the tone and energy of the speaker? How do they feel?
Summarise what's been said to you to show you understand.
Be aware that when you listen, you are listening from your own point of view of the world and that your listener may have a different perspective on things. Take your cue from them.
Notice your conversations over the next few days. When are you really listening? What difference do you notice when you change the way you listen.
Improve Your Active Listening Skills - To learn more about this author, visit Clare Evans's Website.
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Anne BarrAnne Barr has over 26 years experience in sales and marketing, six years as a franchisee. She has assisted over 367 business owners and purchasers to achieve their goals in career change, transition and exit strategy. She holds the designation of Certified Franchise Executive from the International Franchise Association, Certified Business Intermediary from the International Business Brokers Association and Board Certified Broker from the Texas Association of Business Brokers. Anne is active in professional organizations, networking groups and volunteers for non-profit entities. As owner/operator of four successful businesses, Anne has proven people skills and enjoys helping clients find the right "fit" in business ownership. Visit www.FranchiseOpportunitySpecialist.com for more information about me and my company. - Visit Anne Barr's Website |
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George LudwigGeorge Ludwig is a recognized authority on sales strategy and peak performance psychology. An international speaker, trainer, and corporate consultant, he helps clients like Johnson & Johnson, Abbott Laboratories, Northwestern Mutual, CIGNA, and numerous others improve sales force effectiveness and performance. Though it's George's strategies and processes that help corporations increase productivity and performance, it's his tremendous energy and dynamism that spark the transformation. Again and again, clients remark on his amazing ability to unleash human capacity and inspire men and women to break out of their comfort zones. The result is a whole new type of salesperson. His customized presentations teach achievers to make stunning advances in their lives. From helping salespeople realize cherished dreams to helping corporations exponentially accelerate revenue streams, George Ludwig leaves audiences and individuals empowered, emboldened, and clamoring for more. George is the best-selling author of Power Selling: Seven Strategies for Cracking the Sales Code and Wise Moves: 60 Quick Tips to Improve Your Position in Life & Business. - Visit George Ludwig's Website |
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Dave KurlanDave Kurlan is the founder and CEO of Objective Management Group, Inc., the industry leader in sales assessments and sales force evaluations, and the CEO of David Kurlan & Associates, Inc., a consulting firm specializing in sales force development. Dave has been a top rated speaker at Inc. Magazine's Conference on Growing the Company, the Sales & Marketing Management Conference and the Gazelles Sales & Marketing Summit. He has been featured on radio and TV, including World Business Review with General Norman Schwarzkopf, in Inc. Magazine, Selling Power Magazine, Sales & Marketing Management Magazine and Incentive Magazine. He is the author of Mindless Selling and Baseline Selling – How to Become a Sales Superstar by Using What You Already Know about the Game of Baseball. He created and wrote STAR, a proprietary recruiting process for hiring great salespeople, and he writes Understanding the Sales Force, a popular business Blog and is a contributing author to The Death of 20th Century Selling and 101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life, Volume 2. - Visit Dave Kurlan's Website |
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John AlexanderJohn has taught keyword research and SEO skills to small groups of business owners and Webmasters from over 80 different countries world wide since 2002. John is also the Director of Search Engine Academy ; Co-director of Training at Search Engine Workshops offering live, SEO Workshops with his partner SEO educator Robin Nobles, author of the very first comprehensive online search engine marketing courses at SEO Training Online and the SEO Workshop Resource Center. I look forward to hearing from you! - Visit John Alexander's Website |
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Cheryl MatthynssensCheryl is a life skills coach, licensed Chemical Dependency Counselor and a 20 year entrepreneur. Cheryl's dedication to achieving a life of balance led to her expanding her teaching from the simple managing of life's daily challenges to adding financial well being as well. A direct marketer with DrinkACT, she is gaining ground in the online community with her concepts of making sure business owners, entreprenuers and employees have well rounded life styles. She opened up a small affiliate site - The Balance Guide- to help others find resources for mental and emotional well being. Visit Cheryl's blog to see more of the diversity beyond business she has began offering online at www.thebalanceguide.blogspot.com - Visit Cheryl Matthynssens's Website |
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John BrennanJohn Brennan Ed.D. Dr. Brennan is President of Interpersonal Development, LLC, a training and development firm. Interpersonal Development has provided sales training and coaching to more than 3,000 sales reps from over 100 companies. A native of Australia, Dr. Brennan received his doctorate from the University of Rochester. His dissertation researched the effectiveness of Behavioral Modeling Technology in training people in interpersonal skills. While he has spent most of his career designing or delivering training, he was also a Vice-President of Sales of a training and development franchise with operations in 25 markets. Dr. Brennan has designed and delivered sales training in North America, Asia, Europe, Australia and the Middle East. He has been a guest speaker at numerous national and regional professional conferences. When Microsoft wanted Best Practices articles on sales for their web site, they called Dr. Brennan. The results are at http://office.microsoft.com/en-us/FX011387391033.aspx His firm’s clients have included Volvo, The Prudential, Merrill Lynch, Eastman Kodak, Gannett, Equifax Europe, the Economist Group and countless small businesses. - Visit John Brennan's Website |
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David AchesonDavid Acheson is the founder of DCJA Consultancy. DCJA Consultancy is a management consultancy business specialising in B2B sales consultancy. They offer bespoke and packaged sales consultancy including Sales Optimisation Review, Interim Sales Management, Sales & Marketing Review, 1:1 Sales & Management Staff Analysis, Management Training, Solution Sales Training, Creation of New Pay Plan, KPI's, run Customer Feedback Campaigns, assist with Recruitment, Coaching, Appraisals and set up Strategic Marketing Campaigns. David spent his early career in accountancy and then moved into sales in 1982, working in Office Equipment, IT, Advertising, Training, Outsourcing and Consultancy. He has held many Senior Positions in SMBs and Global Organisations including Head of Sales Operations & Head of Business Development. His knowledge, skills and great experience of the Sales Industry has led to David making keynote speeches and running educational sessions to key businesses through organisations including The Chamber of Commerce and Business Link. - Visit David Acheson's Website |
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