Choosing the Right Coach

Guest post by: Stuart Schneiderman
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How to Ace that Job Interview - By Stuart Schneiderman

I’ve said it before, but it bears repeating. When choosing a coach (or even a therapist) do not choose someone who resents your success, who holds you in contempt, or who feels a silent glee when you fail.

These thoughts were occasioned by an article by trading coach Doug Hirschhorn yesterday in The Daily Beast.

Hirschhorn brags that he has counseled thousands of Wall Street traders. Of course, if he has counseled thousands of individuals he has surely not spent very much quality time with very many of them.

Now that many of them are down on their luck, he seems to feel vindicated, as though their failures justify his own decision not to work as hard.

He seems most frustrated by the fact that so many of these traders refused to take his advice to slow down and smell the roses. Apparently, he was not the most influential or persuasive of coaches.

Hirschhorn reasons that Masters of the Universe were hooked on their work, like addicts who were hooked on drugs.

Dare I say that this is not a flattering way to characterize your clientele.

By Hirshchorn’s account, Wall Street traders feel entitled to their giant bonuses because they work at the time, 24/7, and sacrifice their lives on the altar of the god Mammon.

They believe that they are worth millions because they have had to miss their daughters’ dance recitals.

Or at least that is the way they feel now as their bonuses are being cut and they are being scapegoated for the financial crisis.

So, you work very, very hard, you earn a ton of money for your firm, and you feel that you should be compensated for your skill and your effort.

Hirschhorn’s comment: these Wall Streeters are suffering from feelings of entitlement, and besides they are addicted to their bonuses.

As I said… resentment and contempt drip from Hirschhorn’s word processor.

Have you ever heard of an individual who puts everything he has into his job and does not care about his compensation or recognition?

Coach Hirschhorn also seems to believes that his traders are spoiled brats, like the professional athletes who justify their salaries by saying that they have short professional careers.

You can offer such defensive rationalizations, but star traders and star athletes also make large sums of money for their employers. They are, as Hirschhorn says in a more reasonable moment, being paid for performance.

Is there anything strange about that? Does that make them into the moral equivalent of compulsive gamblers and sex addicts? Does that have anything to do with the feeling of entitlement manifested by people who expect to be paid not to work?

And Hirschhorn also notes that Wall Street is a meritocracy. Well and good. It is a competitive arena where people strive to excel, to do better than other people, and where people bear immense responsibilities.

Wall Street‘s Masters of the Universe were paid to make the system run. How important was a well-running financial system? Very important, as it happens, and as we all learned when the credit markets froze last fall.

Should the people who make it run be well paid? Yes, they should. But how should they be compensated when the system runs aground?

At present many Wall Street Masters of the Universe are defensive about their role in the financial crisis. More than a few are angry that they are being scapegoated for the crisis, whether they did a good or a bad job.

Under the circumstances we understand that they would feel the need to offer a rationale for their bonuses, and explain why they deserve to be paid well even when they have a bad year.

What they do not need is the derision and contempt of the people who are trying to help them. Out of such an attitude precious little help will spring.

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How to Ace that Job Interview - By Stuart Schneiderman

About the Author: Stuart Schneiderman

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I began my career as a psychotherapist. Having spent too much time trying to figure out why people get it wrong, I changed course and started helping them to get it right. As a business coach I show people how to lead and manage, how to negotiate and organize. And I especially work on developing good behavior and good character, in oneself and in others.
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