|
|
Like this article? PLEASE +1 it! |  |
|
THE GEEK SHALL INHERIT THE WORLD WIDE WEB
| Guest post by: Deborah Kimmett |
Article Overview: Navigating life on the information highway
 |
Free Download - FIVE WAYS TO GET YOUR SENSE OF HUMOUR BACK By Deborah Kimmett |
THE GEEK SHALL INHERIT THE WORLD WIDE WEB
Last January I cancelled my satellite television. For the first six
months I sat on the couch, pointing the TV changer at the wall, hoping I could
mute the voices in my head. I convinced myself I would read novels by authors like
James Joyce. It’s 365 days later and I’m still on page one of Ulysses, but I
have cut my sleeping medication in half.
I
have traded staring at the TV screen for staring at the computer screen. If I’m
not sitting at it, I feel empty. I stare lovingly at it waiting for pop-ups. I
worship it. I have become a checker. I check endlessly.
This
is how my day goes. I get up and I go to the coffee shop for a cup of anxiety.
They have free Internet access and I check my LinkedIn, eBay account, Zoomers
and Craigslist, and then read the news online. The news is so bad, I read it
again on another site just to make sure it’s that horrible. Who needs
terrorists when the media is there, terrorizing us on a daily basis? Because,
let’s see, are there really more idiots in the world? Or do we just now know
where they live?
Then
my mother calls and tells me that I’d better batten down the hatches as there
is a hurricane coming up the coast of Costa Rica. We’re scared of weather. The
weather is now news. And news is now sport. It’s confusing.
After I hang up the phone I notice a lump on my index finger that I’m
sure wasn’t there when I got up, so when I get back home I ask my cleaning
lady, Merle, to Google my imagined illness du jour. She surmises that I either
have a malignant tumour or gnarly knuckles. We have enough information to be
dangerous. I can’t trust my doctor or my financial advisor. I go online to look
at the state of my mutual funds. My thinking I know how to do my own financial
investing is like Merle doing my yearly physical. Just because she cleans my oven doesn’t mean she knows how
to do a pap test.
At
this point I need something to stop the increasing fear, so I go online to
check how many points I have on my fifteen rewards cards. I have so many
passwords, I fear I will lose my mind one day and be sitting in a nursing home
saying “rascalsbum343.” If you want to check your income tax online, Revenue
Canada now makes you create your own security questions. This means I don’t know the answer or the question. Don’t you love it when
the customer service people start giving you hints? “Your first dog’s name mixed with Grade 1 teacher’s name?” I
answer, “What is my porn name?” and the Revenue Can lady says, “No, that is
your soap opera name.”
I check my email and look at the many forwards sent by retirees who’ve
just discovered how to use a computer. Having an inbox filled with jokes that I don’t read —that’s
what I do for a living. I get so annoyed at an inbox full of warnings that
people are trying to kill you on the highway, I have to email back to tell them
there is a website called urbanmyth.com. And then there is the modern day chain
letter that Canada Post made illegal years ago, but now I receive at least one everyday,
offering me the blessing of 10 thousand cherubs as long as I forward it to 10
people within half an hour. If I don’t, I will burn in hell. Here I am. I live on an island and I’m
yelling at spam.
Low Cost Techniques for Employee Recognition
The Global Economy Recovery Will Be Driven By Women: Part 2
A Simple Act Of Random Kindness
Cheap or Free dSLR Stabilization and Steadicam Tricks
Want to increase sales? productivity? focus? Stop cluttering your mind with useless information. Einstein, was right all along, take these simple tips and apply them today!
Article Tags: 365 days, coffee shop, craigslist, ebay, ebay account, font style, free internet access, handwriting, james joyce, layout grid, nbsp nbsp nbsp nbsp nbsp, pop ups, satellite television, sleeping medication, span style, style text, tv screen, ups, voices in my head, zoomers
|
About the Author: Deborah Kimmett RSS for Deborah's articles - Visit Deborah's website Click here to visit Deborah's website   GOOD CUSTOMER SERVICE FIVE WAYS TO GET YOUR SENSE OF HUMOUR BACK The Roles We Play at Work Keeping Your Chin up in the Emergency Room THE GEEK SHALL INHERIT THE WORLD WIDE WEB |
Related Forum Posts
Top performing Franchise Loans
- Evan,
There are over 120 Franchises listed by the SBA with 0% Loan Failure from 10-1-00 to 9-30-05 these companies have at leat 10 loans disbursed.
A number of the companies are Hotel/Motel Franchises so I listed them separately.
Since all the ones listed have 0% loan failure I listed them descending by # of loans disbursed.
Top 20 (by # loans Disbursed) 0% SBA Loan Failure (does not include hotels/motels)
1 21425--CULVER'S FROZEN CUSTARD 85
2 66910--PRIMROSE SCHOOL (DAYCARE) 76
3 14467--CARTRIDGE WORLD STORES 54
4 68021--QUIZNO'S SUBS 41
5 06560--AUNTIE ANN'S (SOFT PRETZELS) 40
6 29912--FIREHOUSE SUBS 35
7 31154--FOOT SOLUTIONS 35
8 52707--MEDICAP PHARMACY 35
9 09802--BEN & JERRY'S ICE CREAM 33
10 67759--COMFORT SUITES 33
11 70150--RITTER'S FROZEN CUSTARD 32
12 05650--ARBY'S 31
13 65160--PLATO'S CLOSET 31
14 67417--PUMP IT UP 30
15 69149--REMAX 30
16 71456--SALAD WORKS, INC. 30
17 76282--SONIC DRIVE-IN 27
18 84725--UNION 76 OIL 27
19 17049--CHRISTIAN BROTHERS AUTOMOTIVE 26
20 78950--SUNOCO SERVICE STATION 26
Top 10 0% SBA Loan Failure Hotel/Motels
1 10275--BEST WESTERN INN 104
2 67750--COMFORT INN 98
3 38605--HOLIDAY INN EXPRESS 87
4 36680--HAMPTON INNS 57
5 53165--MICROTEL 33
6 75385--SLEEP INN MOTEL 26
7 04160--AMERIHOST INN 18
8 69134--RED ROOF INN 13
9 17230--CLARION INN & SUITES 11
10 20715--COUNTRY INN 11
Share this article with your friends. Fund someone's dream.
Leave a comment below or share on the left and you'll help support entrepreneurs in Africa through our partnership with Kiva. Over $50,000 raised and counting - Please keep sharing! Learn more.
by: Erin Ferree, Small Business Branding Coach
4 Building Blocks of an Effective Talent Management System
Simon Fuller Quotes
Lesson #3: “Tell ‘em quick and tell ‘em often”
Searching for the Stars: How Yang and Filo Took Their Business to New Heights
Salesperson Wimp-Out: I Need Help 
Get advice & tips from famous business
owners, new articles by entrepreneur
experts, my latest website updates, &
special sneak peaks at what's to come!
Soda Vending Machine = Energy Hog
20 MORE Must-Have Search Engine Marketing Tools
SEO and the Entrepreneur
Email us your ideas on how to make our
website more valuable! Thank you Sharon
from Toronto Salsa Lessons / Classes for
your suggestions to make the newsletter
look like the website and profile younger
entrepreneurs like Jennifer Lopez.