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Reach your Potential – Be yourself and push the boundaries
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| Guest post by: Iris Barrow |
Article Overview: Do you have the courage to be yourself, or do you find that you are constantly trying to fit in with others’ expectations? There is a real danger in trying to present the ‘right front’ to a group or person. It’s extremely stressful and you risk losing your identity. If, however, you are true to yourself and willing to extend those self-imposed boundaries, you will be surprised at the rewards. This article explains the benefits of being your true self and suggests ways you can achieve it.
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Free Download - Self-esteem: 5 Ways to Increase your Self-confidence By Iris Barrow |
Reach your Potential – Be yourself and push the boundaries
Have the courage to be yourself
We
can choose to live fully, or to live within a framework of what is familiar and
safe. If we choose the latter we will be limiting ourselves by our past
experience.
There
is always risk involved in living fully, and thereby choosing to be more alive
and joyful human beings, but it is the way that leads to ‘wholeness’.
Doing
so involves breaking down the bars of our own self-imposed cage and daring to
be more fully us, with all that this entails. It means getting out of our
comfort zone and embracing what is outside of our present realm of experience
though always within a framework of wisdom and balance. Experiencing new
things, interacting with people outside of those who are known and familiar to
us, reading books which challenge us and extend our thinking, exploring what
was previously unknown, are all a part of this pathway. At whatever age or circumstance,
our life’s journey should involve ongoing growth and lead us towards reaching
our potential.
Those
who choose to push their boundaries, will almost certainly experience more
depths and heights, but they will feel more enriched as a result of living more
fully. Ultimately they will also come to know, understand and accept
themselves. The rewards of breaking out of that self-imposed cage far outweigh
the risks involved.
The dangers of conforming to others’ expectations
There
is enormous stress in not feeling free to be ourselves. If we are constantly
trying to conform to others’ expectations of us, the pressure will eventually
get to us.
People
become inwardly fragmented when they are continually trying to present the
‘right front’ to this group, or that person. In the end they can feel as if
they have lost their own identity. This has the effect of creating inner
conflict and confusion.
It
takes a lot of energy to conform when it doesn’t come naturally to do so. Are
you familiar with the idiom, ‘to be a round peg in a square hole’? Having to
constantly strive to fit in with a crowd or into a situation that doesn’t align
with our character and our views, can affect our mental health. Ultimately we
have to be ourselves, in order to sustain good mental health.
Of
course the onus is on us to be our ‘better’ rather than our ‘baser’ self, to
function at the top level rather than at the bottom. The latter reflects
emotional immaturity, irresponsibility and self-indulgence. The former, a
journeying towards growth and wholeness.
Self-growth equals striving to reach your potential
Think
of yourself as an iceberg, only the tip is showing – your used potential – the
rest of the iceberg, that vast unseen area beneath the surface of the water –
is your unused potential. It lies there, waiting to be recognized, accepted and
realised.
The
interesting thing about potential is that it grows as you use it.
Using
it, that is, extending beyond your comfort zone, acts as a catalyst.
It
is important that we do not act in a self-limiting way.
When
you think about it, you are probably achieving things today that you could not
conceive of five years ago. Similarly, you will be able to achieve things in
the future that you cannot visualise today. We never fully realise our potential,
because each time we move towards doing so, it increases. This is what ongoing
growth is all about.
Be true to yourself – never compare yourself to others
When
we compare ourselves with other people, we risk putting ourselves down.
It
is negative in the extreme to do so; it is also illogical.
You
are a unique human being with genetic factors, conditioning, attitudes and
perceptions that reflect your uniqueness. Add to this your talents, skills,
abilities, strengths, inner resources and experiences, plus the sense you make
of your life experiences, and you begin to get some idea of how intrinsically
‘different’ you are. There never has been and never will be another human being
who reacts and responds to life as you do. Therefore, how can you possibly compare
yourself to other people?
You
can be the best pear possible, but if you are a pear you can only be an
inferior apple or banana. Or to put it another way, you see things through
green tinted glasses, I see them through purple ones and somebody else sees
them through yellow, therefore my perception of how life is coloured must be
different from yours, or theirs.
The
only true comparison, and indeed the only one we should make, is to compare
ourselves against our potential. The question we should ask ourselves is, how
far have we moved at this present time, towards realising it?
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About the Author: Iris Barrow RSS for Iris's articles - Visit Iris's website Iris Barrow, counselling services, seminar presenter and author, believes in giving people the tools to help themselves. When she couldn’t find the right reading material to give clients, she decided to create her own. Iris has drawn on over 20 years of counselling experience to produce resources that are easy to read and offer practical solutions to life’s problems. Her library of self-help resources includes books (and ebooks), CDs (and downloads) and personality tool-kits for individuals, families and businesses. For current titles, free content and to sign up to receive Iris Barrow's newsletter, visit http://www.irisbarrow.co.nz Click here to visit Iris's website Anxiety-5 Tips to Overcome It Bullying in the Workplace Increase your Self-confidence Self Growth Happy or Unhappy? |
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