Listening Below the Surface of the Words

Guest post by: Jeanie Marshall
Become an Author

Free PDF Download
Finding the Rhythm in Your Breath - By Jeanie Marshall

How well do you listen? Most people listen selectively. There is really nothing wrong with that. You can not listen to everything. In each situation, you need to determine how, what, how much, and where to listen. You can listen and learn anyplace. Life takes place in little vignettes.

At the Cleaners . . .

My dry cleaners is remodeling, producing strain on limited parking. The other day, several of us were frustrated when we finally arrived at the counter.

One woman said, "Are you going to have more parking when all this construction is complete?" The wise counter person deferred to the owner standing nearby. The owner responded to the words of the question rather than taking into consideration the frustration in her voice and energy field.

His well-rehearsed dissertation gave us plenty of facts: one parking space is lost to the construction, persons pose as customers to try to fool the parking attendant, a plan of parking validation, etc. But the Right-Now-in-the-Moment situation with real-live human beings with emotions and needs was essentially ignored.

Had he listened to the information beneath the surface of the words of his customer's question, he would have presented us with fewer facts and perhaps said something like, "We have several plans for improving the parking -- it's quite frustrating right now, isn't it?" A compassionate statement such as this would have diffused the frustration, let her know that he heard the words of the question and more, and invited her to take the conversation in any direction she wanted, if at all.

On the Airplane . . .

On a flight to Vancouver, I appreciated viewing one flight attendant engaging with the passengers. Here is one incident. The attendant spilled hot water near a passenger. He quickly grabbed napkins to mop up the mess, none of which ever touched the passenger. When nearly done, the flight attendant looked at her with a friendly smile and said, "gosh, that was pretty scary, wasn't it?" He didn't gush with apologies or over-react to the situation or blame the bumpy flight. Messes happen.

This flight attendant seemed more interested in his passenger than in how he might be perceived -- what a concept! He is trained to put the comfort and safety of the passengers ahead of his own. And he demonstrated this well.

Anyplace in Life . . .

I often observe how people listen -- or do not listen -- to each other. Listening is an underrated and underdeveloped skill, yet the most important skill in healthy interactions. In a society that emphasizes outward actions, people sometimes forget the value of the inner process.

The words you say are not nearly as important as the consciousness from which you speak. Compassion is a consciousness which is received more deeply than the accompanying words. Phrases are easier to teach than compassion; however, it is the compassion that is most important to learn to embody. When you do, the words follow naturally and are appropriate.

The Art of Heart-Listening

Improve Your Active Listening Skills

Salespeople Must Stop Snorkeling and Start Scuba Diving

Don't Wish It Were Easier, Wish You Were Better Like The Water Hyacinth

Sales Skills For Service Professionals Part 2

Leadership Assessment #12 – Listen Deeply

LISTENING SKILLS IN COACHING

The Magic of Authenticity

Can You Hear Me Now? Great Executive Coaches Are Not Just Great Talkers They're Great Listeners

The Art of Effective Listening

Character: That Makes a Successful Leader

Personal Gravity Part 2 - Filters

Key Management Development Secrets - The Importance of Listening and Questioning Skills

The Tip of the Iceberg - Your Conscious Mind

LISTENING WITH ALL OUR SENSES

Handling pricing and delay objections

Improving Listening Skills

Do You Talk More Than You Listen?

Telling Aint Selling

Managers As Motivators

Home > Human-Resources > Jeanie Marshall > Listening Below the Surface of the Words > Google +

Free PDF Download
Finding the Rhythm in Your Breath - By Jeanie Marshall

About the Author: Jeanie Marshall

RSS for Jeanie's articles - Visit Jeanie's website
Jeanie has an M. S. in Human Resource Development concentrating in Organization Development. She consults by phone in the areas of personal and organization development. As an Personal Development Consultant and Coach, Jeanie helps people to find the power within themselves. She uses traditional resources and innovative approaches to help her clients move from where they are to where they want to be. One of her greatest gifts as a consultant and coach is to hold the vision of her clients' true desires until they're able to step into the vision. Her consultation sessions are playful, inspiring, and transformative. She says, "the most joyous part of my professional life is working one-on-one with clients, which is a partnership of co-creative, empowering ideas." She's the author of multiple books, web sites, CD albums and other personal development products. She has been actively involved in the human potential movement for more than twenty-five years. She is a mentor, coach, facilitator, organizational development consultant, personal development consultant, and a writer. Empowering Personal Development, http://www.empowering-personal-development.com
Click here to visit Jeanie's website.

More from Jeanie Marshall
Moving Through Puddles Or The Puddle Theory of Personal Development
Beginnings and Endings Create Life that is New and Fresh
Pluck it for the Bucket
Questioning What is Enough
Noticing Energy for Personal Empowerment

Share this article. Fund someone's dream.

Share this post and you'll help support entrepreneurs in Africa through our partnership with Kiva. Over $50,000 raised and counting - Please keep sharing! Learn more.

Featured

Expert

Dr Don Yates Sr PhD
@drdony
Visit website

Listening Below the Surface of the Words

Related Articles

Related Forum Posts

Share this article. Fund someone's dream.


Name:
Email: