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Emotional Intelligence – The Hard Truth About Soft Skills

Written by: Kim Freedman

Article Overview: How are your people skills? Academic research has shown that people with high Emotional Intelligence are more successful in business and in life. Emotional Intelligence refers to how well you know yourself, your ability to effectively manage your emotions, and how well you interact with others. Emotional Intelligence is a critical competency for leaders. It is very common in technical fields for people to be promoted to management because they excelled as technicians without much regard for their people skills. Unlike IQ, Emotional Intelligence can be developed.

Emotional Intelligence – The Hard Truth About Soft Skills

According to an article published in the July 2005 issue of CIO magazine, the primary cause of leadership failure in technical organizations is poor interpersonal skills. Talented technicians are often promoted into leadership positions without much thought as to their readiness or suitability for leading people. Unfortunately, many of these managers fail to reach their career potential due to underdeveloped soft skills.

To advance in technical organizations (e.g., engineering, information technology, finance), proficient technical skills are ‘table stakes.’ However, technical skills alone will not take you to the top of the career ladder. The highest performing leaders possess Emotional Intelligence, a term popularized by Daniel Goleman in his book of the same name. He defined emotional intelligence as “the capacity for recognizing our own feelings and those of others, for motivating ourselves, and for managing emotions well in ourselves and in our relationships.”

In the April 2007 issue of PM Network magazine entitled Beyond the Hype, the author recommends that you take an emotional intelligence quotient (EQ) assessment to "get a base reading." Generally, this type of assessment measures your current level of awareness, your skills and competencies, and how you view the world and what you value within it. I use the word 'generally' because there are over 60 different emotional intelligence inventories and assessments currently available.

Regardless of the EQ assessment you select, the results can help you target one or more areas for development and improvement. And, here's the great news – almost everyone can increase their level of emotional intelligence. The assessment delivers the first step, which is awareness. Once you are aware, you choose to change – or not.

Let's say that you want to improve your social competence by becoming a more active listener. Here is an example of a step-by-step change process:

1. Begin by picking one behavior or habit that you believe may be
getting in your way (in our example, poor listening).

2. Declare that you want to improve and establish a goal (e.g., "I
want to practice active listening in 80% of my interactions at work
and at home").

3. Tell at least one other person of your intent to improve in the
selected area (e.g., "I’ve decided that I want to become a better
listener").

4. Ask others for their support, feedback, and suggestions (e.g.,
"Do you have any suggestions that might help me?").

5. Look for opportunities to practice the new behavior ... and do it!

6. Repeat steps 4 and 5 until the more effective new behavior
becomes a habit.

I've seen this 6-step process produce positive results time and time again. Why is it effective? Because whenever you declare a specific intention to someone else, you feel more accountable. Asking for suggestions and support from other people reinforces that intention and sense of accountability. As you listen to what others have to say, you become more self-aware and gain a better understanding of the impact your behavior has on others. And finally, the built-in feedback loop will let you know when you have met your goal.

A professional coach can administer and debrief an EI assessment and provide ongoing support and coaching to speed Emotional Intelligence development.

Related Articles
  How Do Your Soft Skills Measure Up?
  The essence of the soft stuff
  The Buzz About Emotional Intelligence
  Hiring and Promoting Emotional Intelligence
  Soft Skills, Hard Results (Part 1)

Article Tags: active listener, assessment measures, career ladder, cio magazine, competencies, daniel goleman, emotional intelligence quotient, engineering information technology, eq, great news, interpersonal skills, inventories, leadership failure, leadership positions, level of awareness, social competence, suitability, talented technicians, technical organizations, technology finance



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