New Eyes Transform Results
New Eyes Transform Results
One of the impacts of the injury was a partial paralysis on the right side of her body. Over time and through a LOT of hard work on her part, she was able to minimize the impact this had on her. In her right hand, all that remained was a slight loss of dexterity.
This change in dexterity affected how she loaded the dishwasher (of all things). It was a challenge to slip the dishes smoothly into their slots. Often they would clang and clink quite loudly. Sometimes I’d be in the other room listening and flinching as each collision occurred.
It didn’t take long before many of our dishes were chipped.
At that time we were just starting out financially. My career was young, we’d just got married, and money was tight. The idea of spending more money on dishes (in the face of all our other expenses) didn’t appeal.
Although I didn’t realize it at the time, I had grown a little resentful at our “dishes situation.” Each time I’d use a dish that had a chip in it, I’d get that tight little “groan“feeling in my stomach.
One morning April was out and I was alone, making breakfast. I picked a chipped bowl out of the cupboard and poured my cereal and milk in it. The house was quiet. I stood in silence with my thoughts as I ate my cereal and looked at the chip.
The familiar feeling of frustration and negative chatter started to emerge when I stopped and realized…
These chips weren’t about April being clumsy and not caring about the dishes (or the money to replace them).
In actuality, perhaps she WAS trying to be a productive, contributing member of our family. She wasn’t going to sit around, NOT do anything and let her circumstances rule HER. Darn it, she was doing her best to help out with the chores DESPITE her situation.
Somewhere along the line, I’d unknowingly come to the conclusion she just didn’t care and was behaving like that was the truth. It wasn’t!
In the blink of an eye, the chipped dishes meant something COMPLETELY different to me. They shifted from “clumsiness and lack of care” to “courage and determination to contribute.”
Guess what? Ten years later, we still have our chipped dishes.
Why would I replace them?
Fieldwork:
In the above article, my “story” was:
“April doesn’t take care with the dishes.”
I now ask you to consider other questions about YOUR story (or thought) last issue. Ask yourself:
1. “Is this story the absolute truth?” Yes or no. No maybes.
2. “How do I respond to this story?” (Attitudes, feelings, behaviours)
3. “What are those responses costing me?”
4. “What would my life be like if that story didn’t exist?”
In this article, we’re going to turn your story on its head. We’re going to create dramatically different CONTEXT for your “problem.”
5. Take your story and turn it around to its opposite. In essence, create an opposite belief. You may wish to create two or three of them.
For example: “April doesn’t take care with the dishes” could turn into:
a. “April DOES take care with the dishes.”
b. “April actually IS trying her best to contribute to the household.”
c. “April really doesn’t want to chip the dishes either.”
6. Look for real live examples that illustrate the new opposing belief. Be honest with yourself. Take a moment. I bet you’ll find them. For each of the above, some examples that come to mind are:
a. She doesn’t rush when she loads the dishwasher.
b. She hasn’t tried to make the dishwasher loading “Jamie’s job.” She’s definitely not sitting on the couch eating Twinkies while I do housework.
c. April gets really frustrated and down on herself when she chips the dishes.
7. Stop for a moment and really ask yourself: are your new opposing beliefs (in #5 above) just as true or truer than the original story you created? Yes or no.
I bet you answered ‘yes.’ In most, if not all, cases, the opposing belief is just as “provable” as the initial story.
If the old belief is costing you (see your #3 answer) and there is so much more available to you with another belief (your #4 answer), why not choose the new belief?
New Eyes Transform Results - To learn more about this author, visit Jamie Broughton's Website.
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Over 10 years ago now April, my wife, had quite a serious accident. Without getting into the details here, let me just say it was quite a difficult time.
One of the impacts of the injury was a partial paralysis on the right side of her body. Over time and through a LOT of hard work on her part, she was able to minimize the impact this had on her. In her right hand, all that remained was a slight loss of dexterity.
This change in dexterity affected how she loaded the dishwasher (of all things). It was a challenge to slip the dishes smoothly into their slots. Often they would clang and clink quite loudly. Sometimes I’d be in the other room listening and flinching as each collision occurred.
It didn’t take long before many of our dishes were chipped.
At that time we were just starting out financially. My career was young, we’d just got married, and money was tight. The idea of spending more money on dishes (in the face of all our other expenses) didn’t appeal.
Although I didn’t realize it at the time, I had grown a little resentful at our “dishes situation.” Each time I’d use a dish that had a chip in it, I’d get that tight little “groan“feeling in my stomach.
One morning April was out and I was alone, making breakfast. I picked a chipped bowl out of the cupboard and poured my cereal and milk in it. The house was quiet. I stood in silence with my thoughts as I ate my cereal and looked at the chip.
The familiar feeling of frustration and negative chatter started to emerge when I stopped and realized…
These chips weren’t about April being clumsy and not caring about the dishes (or the money to replace them).
In actuality, perhaps she WAS trying to be a productive, contributing member of our family. She wasn’t going to sit around, NOT do anything and let her circumstances rule HER. Darn it, she was doing her best to help out with the chores DESPITE her situation.
Somewhere along the line, I’d unknowingly come to the conclusion she just didn’t care and was behaving like that was the truth. It wasn’t!
In the blink of an eye, the chipped dishes meant something COMPLETELY different to me. They shifted from “clumsiness and lack of care” to “courage and determination to contribute.”
Guess what? Ten years later, we still have our chipped dishes.
Why would I replace them?
Fieldwork:
In the above article, my “story” was:
“April doesn’t take care with the dishes.”
I now ask you to consider other questions about YOUR story (or thought) last issue. Ask yourself:
1. “Is this story the absolute truth?” Yes or no. No maybes.
2. “How do I respond to this story?” (Attitudes, feelings, behaviours)
3. “What are those responses costing me?”
4. “What would my life be like if that story didn’t exist?”
In this article, we’re going to turn your story on its head. We’re going to create dramatically different CONTEXT for your “problem.”
5. Take your story and turn it around to its opposite. In essence, create an opposite belief. You may wish to create two or three of them.
For example: “April doesn’t take care with the dishes” could turn into:
a. “April DOES take care with the dishes.”
b. “April actually IS trying her best to contribute to the household.”
c. “April really doesn’t want to chip the dishes either.”
6. Look for real live examples that illustrate the new opposing belief. Be honest with yourself. Take a moment. I bet you’ll find them. For each of the above, some examples that come to mind are:
a. She doesn’t rush when she loads the dishwasher.
b. She hasn’t tried to make the dishwasher loading “Jamie’s job.” She’s definitely not sitting on the couch eating Twinkies while I do housework.
c. April gets really frustrated and down on herself when she chips the dishes.
7. Stop for a moment and really ask yourself: are your new opposing beliefs (in #5 above) just as true or truer than the original story you created? Yes or no.
I bet you answered ‘yes.’ In most, if not all, cases, the opposing belief is just as “provable” as the initial story.
If the old belief is costing you (see your #3 answer) and there is so much more available to you with another belief (your #4 answer), why not choose the new belief?
New Eyes Transform Results - To learn more about this author, visit Jamie Broughton's Website.
Like this article? Share it with your friends
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Casey GollanCasey Gollan, Business Coaching & Mentoring Programs. Add $1 Million to $10 Million in the next 1 to 3 years. Since 1996 Casey has to added hundreds of millions of dollars to businesses. Watch a free video see client results Business Coaching website. - Visit Casey Gollan's Website |
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Leanne Hoagland-SmithAre your sales where you want them to be? Will you be one of the few who achieves sales or business success or one of the many who have failed to change? Are you tired of being told you are like everyone else? Then you may find my first book on sales of interest. Be the Red Jacket in the Sea of Gray Suits, The Keys to Unlocking Sales available at Amazon or at http://www.processspecialist.com/red-jacket.htm. This book is a reflection of my no-nonsense approach to improving sales to overall business results. If you are truly committed to making sustainable changes, then I can help you secure a positive return on your investment because I focus on executable solutions not telling you the problems you already know you have. From training to corporate (group) coaching to executive one on one coaching, my approach is to assess, create awareness, build a goal driven action plan and then execute. The bottom line question is "Not do you or your employees know it, but do you or they want to do it?" Please call for a free strategy session at 219.759.5601. - Visit Leanne Hoagland-Smith's Website |
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Kim CastleWith nearly two decades in the advertising and design business, with clients like Domino's Pizza, General Motors, Direct TV, Pedigree, Wolfgang Puck, Higher Octave Music, Hollywood Celebrity Products, Disney, and Paramount, as well as thousands of entrepreneurs around the world define, structure, communicate, and position their business for greater profits, BrandU(R) co-creators Kim Castle and W. Vito Montone discovered that entrepreneurs could experience the same power that big brands command for a fraction of the cost with the world's only process-based results-drive Integral approach to business creation. BrandU(R) is helping entrepreneurs grow with the power of extreme clarity from idea...to brand...to market(TM) and helping one million entrepreneurs become successful and whole so that they can make a difference in the world. Are you one of them? If you want to experience clarity all the way to the bank(TM), get started now at http://www.brandu.com. - Visit Kim Castle's Website |
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John BrennanJohn Brennan Ed.D. Dr. Brennan is President of Interpersonal Development, LLC, a training and development firm. Interpersonal Development has provided sales training and coaching to more than 3,000 sales reps from over 100 companies. A native of Australia, Dr. Brennan received his doctorate from the University of Rochester. His dissertation researched the effectiveness of Behavioral Modeling Technology in training people in interpersonal skills. While he has spent most of his career designing or delivering training, he was also a Vice-President of Sales of a training and development franchise with operations in 25 markets. Dr. Brennan has designed and delivered sales training in North America, Asia, Europe, Australia and the Middle East. He has been a guest speaker at numerous national and regional professional conferences. When Microsoft wanted Best Practices articles on sales for their web site, they called Dr. Brennan. The results are at http://office.microsoft.com/en-us/FX011387391033.aspx His firm’s clients have included Volvo, The Prudential, Merrill Lynch, Eastman Kodak, Gannett, Equifax Europe, the Economist Group and countless small businesses. - Visit John Brennan's Website |
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