HOW TO THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX
HOW TO THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX
Ben Fletcher at the University of Hertfordshire in the United Kingdom devised a study to get people to break their usual habits. Each day the subjects picked a different option from poles of contrasting behaviors -- lively/quiet, introvert/extrovert, reactive/proactive -- and behaved according to this assignment. So an introverted person, for example, would act as an extrovert for an entire day. Additionally, twice weekly, they had to stretch to behave in a way outside their usual life pattern – eating or reading something they would never have done.
What do you think was the biggest change in the group?
The remarkable finding was that after four months, the subjects had lost an average of eleven pounds. And six months later, almost all had kept the weight off; some continued to lose weight.
This was not a diet, but a study focusing on change and its impact.
The rationale: requiring people to change routine behavior makes them actually think about decisions rather than habitually choosing a default mode without consideration. This is story busting in an indirect way. In having to actually process decisions actively, they exercised their choice and decision-making abilities, extending to other choices such as what to eat, and what not to. Once becoming aware of actively making choices, they could decide what’s in their best interest, what furthers their stories. And what doesn’t.
The Proverbial “Box”
What is “the box”? How do you get out of the box? How do you get out of your story to revise it--or to write another one?
The questions assume the story is there, a given in the universe. The story—the proverbial “box” of the familiar and accepted—becomes the obstacle. Yet the truth is, it is not there until you create or accept it. And people are always free to change their minds, beliefs and core assumptions.
“The box” is
• The result of programming and conditioning
• Self-created in adulthood
Listen to these different “boxes” to hear how very arbitrary and situational each box is—with its own intrinsic set of beliefs, behaviors, and rules.
• You run while holding an inflated piece of tanned leather, or throw it to someone else to cross a line to make points—sometimes two, sometimes six. (Football)
• It moves in and out of your life, varies daily. You usually want more, but keep doing the same thing not to get it; two people can do the same thing and obtain different quantities. (Money)
• There’s no clear definition of winning. It’s always at risk. There’s always a price to pay. There’s always another level of success. (Money. Life. Your unique story.)
Boxes are not a bad thing. They don’t have to be limiting. They can be defining. Guiding. Validating. And expandable. For example, “the box” may be thinking about how money will flow through traditional channels of business, of charging or working more, of investments, or of inheritance. Open yourself to possibilities you haven’t quite imagined yet. Scarcity is a rigid box. Abundance is expandable.
Recognizing yourself as the author, the creator of your story challenges an assumed model and leads to the deeper question, “How do I create something else instead?” And, “What will the ‘something else’ be?”
12 Principles of Change
You are writing your own story:
1. Assess whether it’s working.
For each component, what are the results? Honestly assess each of these storylines with the question: “Is it working?” And make that a yes or no: personal, business, relationship, money.
2. It takes the same energy to create any belief in your story.
The belief of scarcity takes just as much energy as abundance. Focus your energy on positive intentions.
3. Decide what you want.
The primary reason people don’t get what they want is that they’re not sure what they want. Be clear about where you are now and where you want to be. Your brain, like nature, abhors a vacuum—it will conspire to close the gap between your vision and reality.
4. Do you have specific, measurable goals?
In a Harvard study begun in the mid-1950’s, 10-15% of the Harvard Business School graduates fashioned a vision and specific goals for their life in business. Five decades later, those 10-15% had 90% of the assets of the entire group. Motivation increases as soon as you’re clear about the goal and the payoff.
5. Be consistent in your pursuit of your goals.
It takes thirty days to etch a new pathway in your brain to make it permanent.
6. Small changes lead to big changes.
Divide up your work. Focus on and complete one thing at a time. There’s always something you can focus on.
7. Break out of your comfort zone
Are you repeating the same story, even doing it harder, expecting that to work? Like talking to someone who doesn’t understand English and repeating it louder? Think of your comfort zone as like your home thermostat. If the temperatures increases or decreases, the thermostat signals the heater or air conditioner to turn on or off. It keeps the temperature in a narrow range of comfort.
8. Ask for feedback.
To your employees, colleagues, and spouse: “On a scale of 1-10, how am I doing?” Then, “How can I get to 10?”
9. Get success insurance.
A review of research on goal setting helps us understand two essential components: why people give up on goals, and how effective goal-setting can help ensure long-term achievement. Six of the most important reasons people maintain goals:
ownership; realistic assessments of time, difficulty, and rewards; minimize distractions, and consistent maintenance of new behavior.
10. Take a chance.
You didn’t have a NewYork Times bestseller before you sent your manuscript to an agent. If you get it rejected, you still don’t. So what have you got to lose? What’s the problem—you’ve spent your whole life not having a NewYork Times bestseller.
11. It’s never too late to start.
Don’t accept conventional wisdom or limiting assumptions.
We each have beliefs that limit us. Find the story that will improve you and start believing that.
If there were no barriers, what would your ideal life be?
12. Everything is OK in the end. If it’s not OK, it’s not the end.
Story is the most powerful ways humans communicate. Stories give birth to possibilities. Stories are a way that we resonate with our earlier selves, connect with others, and create a road map to proceed.
David Krueger, M.D. is an Executive Mentor Coach, and CEO of MentorPath, a coaching firm tailored to the needs of executives and professionals. Dr. Krueger is author of 15 books on success, money, wellness, and mind-body integration.
www.MentorPath.com
Wellness Teleseminar information: www.NewLifeStoryCoaching.com
HOW TO THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX - To learn more about this author, visit David Krueger's Website.
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THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX
Ben Fletcher at the University of Hertfordshire in the United Kingdom devised a study to get people to break their usual habits. Each day the subjects picked a different option from poles of contrasting behaviors -- lively/quiet, introvert/extrovert, reactive/proactive -- and behaved according to this assignment. So an introverted person, for example, would act as an extrovert for an entire day. Additionally, twice weekly, they had to stretch to behave in a way outside their usual life pattern – eating or reading something they would never have done.
What do you think was the biggest change in the group?
The remarkable finding was that after four months, the subjects had lost an average of eleven pounds. And six months later, almost all had kept the weight off; some continued to lose weight.
This was not a diet, but a study focusing on change and its impact.
The rationale: requiring people to change routine behavior makes them actually think about decisions rather than habitually choosing a default mode without consideration. This is story busting in an indirect way. In having to actually process decisions actively, they exercised their choice and decision-making abilities, extending to other choices such as what to eat, and what not to. Once becoming aware of actively making choices, they could decide what’s in their best interest, what furthers their stories. And what doesn’t.
The Proverbial “Box”
What is “the box”? How do you get out of the box? How do you get out of your story to revise it--or to write another one?
The questions assume the story is there, a given in the universe. The story—the proverbial “box” of the familiar and accepted—becomes the obstacle. Yet the truth is, it is not there until you create or accept it. And people are always free to change their minds, beliefs and core assumptions.
“The box” is
• The result of programming and conditioning
• Self-created in adulthood
Listen to these different “boxes” to hear how very arbitrary and situational each box is—with its own intrinsic set of beliefs, behaviors, and rules.
• You run while holding an inflated piece of tanned leather, or throw it to someone else to cross a line to make points—sometimes two, sometimes six. (Football)
• It moves in and out of your life, varies daily. You usually want more, but keep doing the same thing not to get it; two people can do the same thing and obtain different quantities. (Money)
• There’s no clear definition of winning. It’s always at risk. There’s always a price to pay. There’s always another level of success. (Money. Life. Your unique story.)
Boxes are not a bad thing. They don’t have to be limiting. They can be defining. Guiding. Validating. And expandable. For example, “the box” may be thinking about how money will flow through traditional channels of business, of charging or working more, of investments, or of inheritance. Open yourself to possibilities you haven’t quite imagined yet. Scarcity is a rigid box. Abundance is expandable.
Recognizing yourself as the author, the creator of your story challenges an assumed model and leads to the deeper question, “How do I create something else instead?” And, “What will the ‘something else’ be?”
12 Principles of Change
You are writing your own story:
1. Assess whether it’s working.
For each component, what are the results? Honestly assess each of these storylines with the question: “Is it working?” And make that a yes or no: personal, business, relationship, money.
2. It takes the same energy to create any belief in your story.
The belief of scarcity takes just as much energy as abundance. Focus your energy on positive intentions.
3. Decide what you want.
The primary reason people don’t get what they want is that they’re not sure what they want. Be clear about where you are now and where you want to be. Your brain, like nature, abhors a vacuum—it will conspire to close the gap between your vision and reality.
4. Do you have specific, measurable goals?
In a Harvard study begun in the mid-1950’s, 10-15% of the Harvard Business School graduates fashioned a vision and specific goals for their life in business. Five decades later, those 10-15% had 90% of the assets of the entire group. Motivation increases as soon as you’re clear about the goal and the payoff.
5. Be consistent in your pursuit of your goals.
It takes thirty days to etch a new pathway in your brain to make it permanent.
6. Small changes lead to big changes.
Divide up your work. Focus on and complete one thing at a time. There’s always something you can focus on.
7. Break out of your comfort zone
Are you repeating the same story, even doing it harder, expecting that to work? Like talking to someone who doesn’t understand English and repeating it louder? Think of your comfort zone as like your home thermostat. If the temperatures increases or decreases, the thermostat signals the heater or air conditioner to turn on or off. It keeps the temperature in a narrow range of comfort.
8. Ask for feedback.
To your employees, colleagues, and spouse: “On a scale of 1-10, how am I doing?” Then, “How can I get to 10?”
9. Get success insurance.
A review of research on goal setting helps us understand two essential components: why people give up on goals, and how effective goal-setting can help ensure long-term achievement. Six of the most important reasons people maintain goals:
ownership; realistic assessments of time, difficulty, and rewards; minimize distractions, and consistent maintenance of new behavior.
10. Take a chance.
You didn’t have a NewYork Times bestseller before you sent your manuscript to an agent. If you get it rejected, you still don’t. So what have you got to lose? What’s the problem—you’ve spent your whole life not having a NewYork Times bestseller.
11. It’s never too late to start.
Don’t accept conventional wisdom or limiting assumptions.
We each have beliefs that limit us. Find the story that will improve you and start believing that.
If there were no barriers, what would your ideal life be?
12. Everything is OK in the end. If it’s not OK, it’s not the end.
Story is the most powerful ways humans communicate. Stories give birth to possibilities. Stories are a way that we resonate with our earlier selves, connect with others, and create a road map to proceed.
David Krueger, M.D. is an Executive Mentor Coach, and CEO of MentorPath, a coaching firm tailored to the needs of executives and professionals. Dr. Krueger is author of 15 books on success, money, wellness, and mind-body integration.
www.MentorPath.com
Wellness Teleseminar information: www.NewLifeStoryCoaching.com
HOW TO THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX - To learn more about this author, visit David Krueger's Website.
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