The Explanation Gap
The Explanation Gap
Amazing how such little communication gap can cause such a BIG gap in our outcomes. Two problems here: The resulting statement is a mere shadow of the intended statement. Second, and more importantly, it makes no sense!
One communication lesion I have learned – and continue to learn each day – is that we need to be more specific than we think we need to be.
I remember when my son was 11 years old he earned his Junior Black Belt in karate. Of course, I was very proud of him, for he had come a very long way since his first lesson. I remember that lesson well. He was seven years old, and one of the first things the master instructor taught him was a simple exercise called a kata. This kata ended with him, the beginning student, saying emphatically, "V for victory and bow for humility” as he crisscrossed arms over his head with fists clinched for the “V” and then bowed for humility.
That night, he came home from his lesson and quickly ran to me to proudly show me what he had learned. Seeing his enthusiasm, I dropped what I was doing and became an intent audience of one. As he finished the kata, he performed the closing, "V for victory, bow for humility!” he shouted.
But then, to my surprise, he started yelling insults at me… “Man, I took you down! How about that buddy!” and so on. More than a bit shocked and confused, I asked, “Hey pal, what was that all about?” He responded in a very matter of fact manner, "Dad, that's the bow for humility."
Well, this pointed out how such a little difference could make a BIG difference – he thought it was a bow for humiliation, not humility!
Fear not, we clarified that definition before he earned his Black Belt!
If we depend on others’ perceptions to meet our expectations, we will be disappointed. My son heard his instructor’s performance expectation but made his own (incredibly misdirected) interpretation, based on his own perceptions.
The Explanation Gap - To learn more about this author, visit Lee Colan's Website.
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Excellent communicators understand that an explanation gap typically results in an execution gap. Remember the old rumor mill game? Tell a phrase to the person next to you at a table. Your neighbor tells it to their neighbor. And so on. Before you know it, the phrase “Let’s wrap the various toys with vibrant colors to excite the recipients” turns into “Let’s rap serious tunes with vibing colors to recite to the residents.”
Amazing how such little communication gap can cause such a BIG gap in our outcomes. Two problems here: The resulting statement is a mere shadow of the intended statement. Second, and more importantly, it makes no sense!
One communication lesion I have learned – and continue to learn each day – is that we need to be more specific than we think we need to be.
I remember when my son was 11 years old he earned his Junior Black Belt in karate. Of course, I was very proud of him, for he had come a very long way since his first lesson. I remember that lesson well. He was seven years old, and one of the first things the master instructor taught him was a simple exercise called a kata. This kata ended with him, the beginning student, saying emphatically, "V for victory and bow for humility” as he crisscrossed arms over his head with fists clinched for the “V” and then bowed for humility.
That night, he came home from his lesson and quickly ran to me to proudly show me what he had learned. Seeing his enthusiasm, I dropped what I was doing and became an intent audience of one. As he finished the kata, he performed the closing, "V for victory, bow for humility!” he shouted.
But then, to my surprise, he started yelling insults at me… “Man, I took you down! How about that buddy!” and so on. More than a bit shocked and confused, I asked, “Hey pal, what was that all about?” He responded in a very matter of fact manner, "Dad, that's the bow for humility."
Well, this pointed out how such a little difference could make a BIG difference – he thought it was a bow for humiliation, not humility!
Fear not, we clarified that definition before he earned his Black Belt!
If we depend on others’ perceptions to meet our expectations, we will be disappointed. My son heard his instructor’s performance expectation but made his own (incredibly misdirected) interpretation, based on his own perceptions.
The Explanation Gap - To learn more about this author, visit Lee Colan's Website.
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