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Can the Bully Become a Leader?

Guest post by: Sylvia Lafair

Article Overview: Did you ever work for anyone who points his finger toward you like they want to poke out your eyes? Did you, or maybe do you, work for someone who is always telling you what is not working and rarely acknowledges what is working? Have you ever reported to someone whose negativity is like a cloud over every sunny day? Welcome to the world of the persecutor/bully boss. There seem to be so many of them out there, especially during this time of economic tension. The big question is "Do you stay and suffer or leave?"

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Can the Bully Become a Leader?

Did you ever work for anyone who points his finger toward you like they want to poke out your eyes? Did you, or maybe do you, work for someone who is always telling you what is not working and rarely acknowledges what is working? Have you ever reported to someone whose negativity is like a cloud over every sunny day? Welcome to the world of the persecutor/bully boss. There seem to be so many of them out there, especially during this time of economic tension. The big question is "Do you stay and suffer or leave?"

Before you go to that either/or scenario stop a minute and think about what you can do or say that might, just might make a difference. "Not possible" you say. Maybe that is true. However, before you give up totally, think about what your work day would be like of your boss could learn to point that finger up toward the sky, the place where dreams and visions are formed.

Here are a few simple tips for you to help the persecutor/bully boss become a visionary leader:

• Get personal: No, I don't mean get chummy. I do mean see your boss as a human being who has a life outside of work.

• Ask: Just some simple stuff about family may give you a clue to who this man or woman is and what makes them tick

• Offer: Find out what kind of extra help you can give to get through a tough project

• Suggest: A few ideas that may or may not be utilized may help the boss see a new perspective

• Own: Tell your boss about what you do to limit stress, it may be an ‘aha' that could be of benefit to him or her

• Acknowledge: You can always find something to appreciate and you'd be surprised what happens when you say it to instead of just thinking it

• Paint: A bigger picture of what the future at work can look like that may be just the right medicine to help your boss out of a slump

The newest research in neuropsychology indicates that we certainly do impact each other and that change is not just internal, it is between individuals. The best leadership development programs and conflict resolution seminars give methods and techniques to show that helping each other is heath inducing and can create powerful changes in the workplace. So, go to it. Your boss will thank you.

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Home > Leadership > Sylvia Lafair > Can the Bully Become a Leader >
Article Tags: boss, future, leader, negativity, persecutor, tension

About the Author: Sylvia Lafair
RSS for Sylvia's articles - Visit Sylvia's website

Developing leaders and transforming teams is my speciality. As a clinical psychologist I know that we bring the behaviors we learned in our original organization, the family, into our present work organization. The key to leadership is understanding how individuals form a system and how that system impacts the bottom line. I have worked globally and find that the core of relationships is much the same whether in California, China,or Chile. My book "Don't Bring It to Work (Jossey Bass) offers tools and strategies for developing collaborative work cultures and important core techniques for entrepreneurs to have motivated and fast moving teams. I am a speaker at national conferences, radio, and television. You can follow my blogs at  http://www.sylvialafair.com/blog/ . You may contact Sylvia Lafair, PhD, author of "Don't Bring It to Work" directly at, sylvia@ceoptions.com or 570-636-3858 for any questions or feedback you may have.

Click here to visit Sylvia's website
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