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Leadership, Fame, Success, and Jon Gosselin

Guest post by: Sylvia Lafair

Article Overview: Did you ever read a blog, check news headlines, watch a television program and have quick thought, sort of like, "what a jerk" or "they messed up"? We all do; mostly without having the whole picture in mind. We make statements about success, failure, winners, and losers. Wonder what people think of you? Have you ever had employees complete a 360 feedback evaluation about you? Anyone ever blog about you, your company, your products; leave comments on Facebook or LinkedIn? The web and social media have changed the ways we communicate. It's a new world, new rule of conversing, and we are all in a steep learning curve about what is fair, right, ethical.

Leadership, Fame, Success, and Jon Gosselin

Did you ever read a blog, check news headlines, watch a television program and have quick thought, sort of like, "what a jerk" or "they messed up"? We all do; mostly without having the whole picture in mind. We make statements about success, failure, winners, and losers.

Wonder what people think of you? Have you ever had employees complete a 360 feedback evaluation about you? Anyone ever blog about you, your company, your products; leave comments on Facebook or LinkedIn? The web and social media have changed the ways we communicate. It's a new world, new rule of conversing, and we are all in a steep learning curve about what is fair, right, ethical.

So, what does this all have to do with Jon Gosselin?

I have been doing leadership/life coaching with Jon and he is participating in our Total Leadership Connections program. Somehow, the media found out and called. I do not give out names of clients. It has led me to think about what is valued in our culture. What does fame mean? What is success?

It is what led to me writing this blog which Jon encouraged. You can certainly Google to learn more about him and the Jon and Kate Plus Eight television show. This is not about that. This is about what happened on Father's Day.

My husband and business partner, Herb and I were at our Pa. Retreat "The Country Place". Our grown children are scattered across the country so phone wishes were enough. Jon called and said if we were home he could bring the eight young ones over. Two reasons; Jon's dad died years ago and he feels close to Herb who is his mentor in the leadership program. Also, he did not want to have the children hounded by the paparazzi.

We are on 450 acres and it would be great to run around and play. We set up a scavenger hunt, paddle boating, and a barbecue. It was a delightful day.

On Monday he called to forewarn, there were pictures on the web. Someone with a long lens camera had been in the woods to take and I assume sell the pictures. Not long after I received several media calls. I have worked with well known people in the business world. This is not like that.

I started to think about the difference between fame and success. Jon is like honey, the paparazzi like flies. Question: does being in the media day after day make you a success? Of course not; it can and often does give a sense of fleeting fame. Two very different modalities; fame can be seductive, while success is for those who are in a long term, invested relationship with themselves.

Jon has had his share of being in the spotlight. Now, after divorce, he is on a journey to reinvent himself. It takes courage and tenacity to peel away the layers of a life that has been so public for the past five years, where what is real gets blurred with what is on camera.

He is no different than most of us. We are, like Jon reinventing ourselves. We are all grappling with what true success means as we come out of a bleak economy, where there may well have been have been loss of job, loss of home equity, loss of income, and possibly loss of purpose.

We are all learning that success is tied to change, to finding better ways to live, to dig down deep inside and see what really matters; to know that whatever life sends your way is there as strength training.

Take some time over the July fourth holiday and think about you, your definition of success and what really matters. Join in with the discussion of how you measure success. The best answers will get a free, signed copy of the book "Don't Bring It to Work" read in our leadership program.

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Article Tags: Dont Bring It to Work, Family, Jon Gosselin, Leadership, Leadership Program, Self Reflection, Sylvia Lafair, Total Leadership Connections, Transformation



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