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Are You Rude on The Internet? It Can Hurt Your Business.

Written by: Erin Blaskie

Article Overview: I don’t know about you but I’ve noticed a disturbing trend occurring both on the Internet and in real life. The trend is rudeness. I watched a taping of Oprah tonight (see the CNN breakdown of this show here) that enlightened me to a book, a doctor and a quote that made the light bulbs go off. Dr. PM Forni wrote a book called, “Choosing Civility: The Twenty-Five Rules of Considerate Conduct” and although I have not read it yet, you bet it will be in my next book store purchase.

Are You Rude on The Internet? It Can Hurt Your Business.

I don’t know about you but I’ve noticed a disturbing trend occurring both on the Internet and in real life. The trend is rudeness. I watched a taping of Oprah tonight (see the CNN breakdown of this show here) that enlightened me to a book, a doctor and a quote that made the light bulbs go off.

Dr. PM Forni wrote a book called, “Choosing Civility: The Twenty-Five Rules of Considerate Conduct” and although I have not read it yet, you bet it will be in my next book store purchase.

The thing that Dr. Forni said that made me stop dead in my tracks was that rudeness is often bred when anonymity meets stress. Can you see how prevalent this is for us Internet users? How much more anonymous can you get?

The shocking part about rudeness on the Internet is that reputations far exceed transactions. When you treat another human being, be it in person or on the Internet, with negative or rude conduct, that behavior is never forgotten. There is a beautiful quote by Maya Angelou that goes something like: long after people remember what you said or did, they’ll remember how you made them feel.

During the Oprah show, Dr. Forni also said: “The quality of our lives is about treating each other well in every situation. We are all the trustees of one another’s happiness and well-being in life.”

Some of the shocking behavior I see on a near weekly basis in my Internet-based business includes:

* Nasty e-mails that lack civility or respect

* Emotional downloads when things don’t go exactly as planned

* Blame for things that are out of the other person’s control

* Transferrence of anger toward a situation

* Opinions not being heard or considered

* Payment for work not being prompt or sometimes, not being done at all

* Expectations exceeding normal abilities (mind reading for example)

* Wanting from others what you don’t emit yourself

* General workplace agression

The thing to remember is that we are all human beings and anonymous or not, you still need to remember the basic rules of respect and kindness. If you treat people as though you’ll never see them again and don’t care how you make them feel, you’ll be remembered in that way.

Another interesting point that Dr. Forni made on the show was that being rude is actually scientifically proven to make you sicker.

When you emit rude behavior, you actually release harmful and specific hormones (catecholamines) into your body. It may make you feel powerful or empowered in the moment but in the long run, it’s doing you more harm than good.

Catecholamines cause general physiological changes that prepare the body for physical activity (fight-or-flight response). Some typical effects are increases in heart rate, blood pressure, blood glucose levels, and a general reaction of the sympathetic nervous system.

So, why are people so rude? Aside from anonymity meeting stress, people also feel insecure. When insecurities come up, we push our own insecurities aside by calling out other people’s mistakes or flaws or by talking down to people. Remember that if you are exhibiting certain behaviors toward others, it’s usually something you need to deal with yourself that exists inside of you.

About Choosing Civility the Book by Dr. Forni:

Most people would agree that thoughtful behavior and common decency are in short supply, or simply forgotten in hurried lives of emails, cellphones, and multi-tasking.

In Choosing Civility, P. M. Forni identifies the twenty-five rules that are most essential in connecting effectively and happily with others. In clear, witty, and, well…civilized language, Forni covers topics that include:

* Think Twice Before Asking Favors

* Give Constructive Criticism

* Refrain from Idle Complaints

* Respect Others’ Opinions

* Don’t Shift Responsibility and Blame

* Care for Your Guests

* Accept and Give Praise

Finally, Forni provides examples of how to put each rule into practice and so make life-and the lives of others-more enjoyable, companionable, and rewarding. Choosing Civility is a simple, practical, perfectly measured, and quietly magical handbook on the lost art of civility and compassion.

Related Articles
  Swallowing your Anger
  Drawing the Line on Rude Customers
  The Fireman's Pole First, Kindergarten Next.
  When You Say The Wrong Thing
  Setting Boundaries

Article Tags: anger, anonymity, book store, choosing civility, cnn, downloads, forni, happiness, internet based business, internet users, light bulbs, maya angelou, mind reading, oprah show, reputations, rsquo, rudeness, shocking behavior, stress, transferrence
Referred by: http://www.success-stream.com



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