To-do List vs. Promises and Agreements

Guest Contributor: Lorraine Cohen
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In my post last month I talked about monthly agreements and the language of each promise. I've been asked several times to make the distinction between promises and to-do lists.

Here's one way to look at the difference. When setting your sights on a goal you wish to reach in the future, you will typically lay out an action plan that includes the steps you will take to get from here to there, right? In other words, what you will do to arrive at your destination. Each step will have a result. While it might initially start out as a promise, you might find yourself slipping into creating a to-do list.

One of your goals might be to systematize your business so that you're working more efficiently. Your steps might include:

1. Evaluating current programs and continuing to upgrade where needed

2. Calling web person to revamp your website

3. Scheduling time to declutter and organizing your office

4. Ordering new office equipment

5. Updating your marketing material

6. Outsourcing work

7. Registering for a new course or training

I make this distinction because getting caught up in making lists rather than being accountable or in integrity to the promises being made will affect the value received from masterminding. The goal is not to show how busy you are doing stuff, rather to make agreements that have a built in intention that challenge you to s-t-r-e-t-c-h outside of your comfort zone (which is why you're in a mastermind group!).

The agreements you make are meant to nudge you forward and might create some discomfort so that you feeling slightly off balance. Being slightly off kilter offers opportunities to limitless possibilities that can lead to rich results. In fact, you might choose to add something in your promises that is deliberately uncomfortable with the intent of kicking things up a notch.

So be bold in challenging yourself to have what you desire. The possibilities are endless.

Masterminding and Monthly Agreements

Guest Contributor: Lorraine Cohen
Lorraine's Posts - Lorraine's Blog


I've had my own personal mastermind group for about 5 years. Over the last five years the group has undergone many transformational changes including becoming more serious and intentional about the results we wanted.

One of the changes we implemented last year was the idea of creating monthly agreements. Essentially, we made a mental paradigm shift on the idea of goal-setting to focus on committing to monthly agreements; making self-promises and that you agree to fulfill to yourself and the group.

In other words, being in integrity with yourself about who you are and what you really want thereby enlisting your mastermind team to hold you to your best in keeping your promises. How good do you feel when you say you'll do something and then you don't do it?

Note: the promises are meant to stretch you out of your comfort zone so that you are challenging yourself to growth yourself and your business. They reflect your dreams and desires in ways that are meant to motivate and inspire you forward.

Here's what we do:

1. All monthly promises are due in writing on the first day of each month to include the name of each person and the month date. Promises are emailed to each member in advance of our upcoming meeting. (We meet monthly on the first Friday of each month).

2. The language of each promise is important. Agreements include both business and personal intentions. Promises are stated in succinct and action-based language. For example: Attend 5 networking events this month. Secure three speaking engagements. Exercise 4-5 times per week, 30-45 minutes (min. 2 days strength train, 2-3 days cardio). Schedule 3 strategic get-acquainted coffee meetings with prospects. If the language is wishy-washy, we hold each person accountable to restate the promise with deeper intention. The number of monthly promises varies and is not meant to become a to-do list.

3. Each month we debrief on our progress and deal with any resistance and obstacles. Conversations are authentic and direct with compassion and accountability. Fostering a strong relationship of safety and integrity with my group has enabled me to be authentic and vulnerable with them about my challenges and opportunities especially during those times when it gets a bit emotional and confrontational. Frankly, I wouldn't have it any other way. That's what they are there to do - hold me to my best so that I am living my vision.

To your success!

Lorraine