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WHEN LIFE IS HARD

Written by: Nikki Owen

Article Overview: In today’s rapidly changing world, nothing changes quite so rapidly as people. We all have desires, dreams, fears and emotional needs that drive us in our quest to create more of the life we want, trying to attain our own vision of success and that ellusive, tantalising taste of permanent happiness and personal fulfillment.

WHEN LIFE IS HARD

The history books are littered with individuals who have achieved ‘mind blowing’ feats in the face of adversity, and when you dig beneath the surface you’ll discover that they all found a way of living their vision that worked for them. You see, there are countless ways of you getting what you want and the real secret lies with your ability to find your own way, the way that works best for you.

We have become conditioned by all sorts of influential teachers and mentors in the field of personal development that it’s easy to get what you want if you think positively. Great, don’t they realise that life is bloody hard at times and there are moments in time when most of us have felt defeated, crushed and scared? Yes, of course being positive is important yet the truth is that life is full of easy and hard times, and we seem to spend our lives with an inner conflict that if we were doing ok then our lives would be easier which leads to guilt and ‘big time’ self deception.

If we delude ourselves that life is always easy then we are constantly setting ourselves up for a lifetime of failed expectations that can erode our self-esteem and before you know it we begin acting like victims, powerless as we wallow in a big bucket of 'poo'.

Imagine if you were setting out to climb Mount Everest and you convinced yourself that it would be easy. Then, as you start your momentous journey you realise that you are totally unprepared mentally for the tough reality you are experiencing. Wouldn’t it be easier if you did accept from the outset that it was going to be a hard climb? Less surprises, fewer expectations dashed and a strong mindset equipped to carry you through the precipices as well as the ridges until you finally reach the top.

Think about this in your own lives and identify 3 occasions when you embarked on a task that you believed would be easy and it turned out to be much harder than you had anticipated. What could have been the positive consequences for you if, prior to each task you expected that it wouldn't be easy yet you visualised yourself dealing with the hardships and accomplishing each one?

Every action you take creates a reaction which is based on the formula of cause and effect. Everything that happens is the effect of an underlying cause. Most people spend their lives operating at effect….”It’s not my fault I always end up in bad relationships”, “Life’s so unfair, things always happen to me.” True personal power can be achieved when an individual accepts 100% responsibility for what they create in their lives. To put it another way you get one of two things; the result or outcome you want or the reasons why you didn’t, (you may recognise these as ‘excuses’!) The more you focus on the reasons and blame circumstances beyond your control you push away your personal power. Therefore, if you believe that you are in control of the situations that life ‘appears’ to throw at you, then you are in control of your thinking and emotions, and therefore in control of your own life. This belief has given me the determination to breakthrough so many barriers and overcome countless challenges when at times it was tempting to wallow in self-pity. If something good or bad happens to me I ask myself, “How did I create that?” If you choose to do the same you are tapping into your brain’s infinite potential and it will give you all the answers you need. If you’re prepared to commit 100% to taking responsibility for your own life, the results can be extraordinary.

It can be really interesting to make a list of occasions in the past when you went through an awful time. Then, see if you can spot the patterns or links that were common in all these occasions. Whether you believe you were responsible for each situation or not, imagine you were - how did you or how could you have created them? What did you learn from each of these occasions that you can or have already begun applying in your current life?

I'm sure that most people reading this will know that we are all motivated by one of two things. A desire to get more pleasure into our life or a need to avoid pain. Avoiding pain is an extremely strong motivator and drives ordinary people to achieve extraordinary results. Understanding where your motivation comes from can help you to leverage your drive, giving you added momentum in your quest to accomplish what you want.
Whether you perceive that life is hard or easy is absolutely fine, if it's driving you towards your purpose and vision. And, if I'm absolutely honest with you, I've started to really love life when it's particularly hard because I know that the universe is giving me a valuable lesson that when I learn it, will lead me towards even greater success.

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Article Tags: adversity, all sorts, big time, feats, great don, guilt, hard climb, history books, inner conflict, mentors, mindset, momentous journey, moments in time, mount everest, outset, personal development, self deception, self esteem, surprises, time self



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