1) Change your mental model of “success” and “failure”
Most people operate with the following mental model:
SUCCESS <== <== YOU ==> ==> FAILURE They see themselves in the middle, with success on one end and failure on the other. They do everything they can to move toward success and away from failure. But, what if the model were reconfigured?
YOU ==> ==> FAILURE ==> ==> SUCCESS What if, rather than seeing failure as something to be avoided it became a “stepping-stone” on the path to success? In other words: Success is the destination. Failure is how you get there. To achieve significant success in today’s world, failure is not just a possibility…it is a requirement. We must see success and failure for what they truly are: not opposites, but opposite sides of the same coin.
2) Intentionally increase your failure rate If it’s true that the more we fail, the more we succeed (and it is), then the immediate goal should be to intentionally increase your failure rate! Yes, this is a counter-intuitive, reverse thinking philosophy… but it works! In this way, we are succeeding even when we fail (as illustrated by this interaction between a student and Zen Master):
Student: Master, if one attempts to fail and succeeds, is he a failure or a success?
Master: Yes! Exactly!
Intentionally increasing failure is the basis for the "Go for No" concept. "Go for No" means the more people that tell you "no" the closer you will get to ultimate success - or in other words, "yes." Most people, if they actually counted the number of times they hear “no” during a typical day or week (which we recommend they do) would be shocked to see how low the number actually is. We recommend that to create a greater “NO-awareness” carrying a small pocket counter or note pad to track their noes.
3) Set “No” goals Everyone sets success goals; few people set no goal. And that is what we suggest. But how about setting goals for the number of times we fail? For example, rather than a salesperson setting the goal of having 2 prospects say “yes” to them, they set the goal of being turned down (hearing “no”) 10 times. Imagine the first two prospects they called on said, “Yes!” Rather than being done (having hit their “yes” goal) they’d actually be behind because they still have 10 noes to go!
The other exciting aspect of this strategy is how it keeps people “in the game” when they’re “hot!” If all you have is yes goals and you slow down (or quit) when you’re successful, then the hot streak ends. But if you keep going when the yeses of life are falling at your feet, the sky is the limit!
4) Celebrate your failures, not just your successes.
It’s natural to be excited about our successes and to celebrate them, to give ourselves a reward or even throw a party. But, if the key to success is to increase our failures, then it only makes sense to celebrate our set backs as well. Yes, you heard right: if someone turns you down, celebrate it! When’s the last time you rewarded yourself for failing? Probably never! Instead of mentally punishing yourself for not succeeding, what if you bought yourself an ice cream cone and said, “I’m one step closer to success!” Maybe failure would stop having the negative hold it has on your thoughts and emotions.
5) See courage as a “muscle”
If failure is vehicle that that can take you to success, then courage is the fuel! Most people, however, think that courage is something you’ve either got or you don’t; they don’t see it as a skill that can be developed and process to be mastered. But that’s exactly what it is. Courage is a muscle. And, like any muscle, it must be exercised to be developed and strengthened. As the saying goes: Use it, or lose it. It’s no different with courage. You use and develop your “courage muscle” by looking fear in the eye and taking action anyway. Every time you take action, the courage muscle gets stronger; every time you fail to take action, it atrophies a little. And before you know it your courage is gone.
It doesn’t have to be that way. All the courage you could ever want or need to achieve every goal you have is already in you, just waiting for you to say, “Come on. Let’s go for a ride.”
5 Secrets of Turning Failure Into Success - To learn more about this author, visit Richard Fenton's Website.
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Richard Fenton
(Visit Richard's Website)
Having spent his early years in fleet
sales at the nation's largest auto
dealership, Rich learned to sell, serve,
and succeed from a true master... who just
happened to be his father! But Rich's true
calling has always been speaking And with
thirty years of successful experience as a
salesperson, manager, and training
director for some America's premier
organizations including Disney, Macy's,
Hart Shaffner & Marx, and LensCrafers,
Ricahrd Fenton is uniquely qualified to
motivate people to reach increased levels
of performance. Rich has spent the last
eight years as owner of his own
speaking-training-consulting firm, and
is the author of three books, including
the highly acclaimed "Go for No!" and over
100 published articles on sales and
management performance. Rich delivers
dynamic, engaging presentations that not
only connect with audiences but provide
real-world techniques and strategies that
can be implemented immediately to achieve
breakthrough performance.
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