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Life Coaching Questioning Skills - Don't Install Your Own Preferences!

Life Coaching Questioning Skills - Don't Install Your Own Preferences!

There may come a time when your identification and experience of the situation become useful for the client, but it is important to recognise that, as a coach, it's not your job to lead your client down any path at all to their desired outcome.  Neither is it your job to determine or assume the desired outcome on behalf of your client.

So when coaching, remember to stay, 'content' free'.  Be especially vigilant of your own state.  Remember, if you are in really good rapport with your client, and have tested this by pacing and leading the rapport, if something your client tells you 'rattles' you - into an internal state and physiology that would not be useful for you to pass it on to your client - it may be best for you to downgrade, or even break, rapport and continue in a more detached mode.

Watch your questions for subconscious leading.  We all want 'the best' for our clients but who determines 'the best'.  They do!  Don't lead them with your questioning or install assumptions and beliefs with your questions.  Let your client determine their own desired outcomes and their own process for getting to it.  Your job as a coach is to assist them in creating options and choosing their path.

Is there an exception to this?  There might be.  If you honestly believe your experience may be useful for them, explain to them that you have had an experience that caused you to identify with them and ask them if they would like to know about it.  Then, tell them a story, impartially and without judgement or justification, of what happened and what you and other people did.  Allow them to take from it whatever you will and, whatever you do, don't take any comments or feedback personally!







Life Coaching Questioning Skills Dont Install Your Own Preferences - To learn more about this author, visit Robert Neely's Website.

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Cheryl Matthynssens

Cheryl is a life skills coach, licensed Chemical Dependency Counselor and a 20 year entrepreneur.  Cheryl's dedication to achieving a life of balance led to her expanding her teaching from the simple managing of life's daily challenges to adding financial well being as well.  A direct marketer with DrinkACT, she is gaining ground in the online community with her concepts of making sure business owners, entreprenuers and employees have well rounded life styles.  She opened up a small affiliate site - The Balance Guide-  to help others find resources for mental and emotional well being.  Visit Cheryl's blog to see more of the diversity beyond business she has began offering online at www.thebalanceguide.blogspot.com

- Visit Cheryl Matthynssens's Website

Casey Gollan
Casey Gollan, Business Coaching & Mentoring Programs. Add $1 Million to $10 Million in the next 1 to 3 years. Since 1996 Casey has to added hundreds of millions of dollars to businesses. Watch a free video see client results Business Coaching website. - Visit Casey Gollan's Website

John Brennan
John Brennan Ed.D. Dr. Brennan is President of Interpersonal Development, LLC, a training and development firm. Interpersonal Development has provided sales training and coaching to more than 3,000 sales reps from over 100 companies. A native of Australia, Dr. Brennan received his doctorate from the University of Rochester. His dissertation researched the effectiveness of Behavioral Modeling Technology in training people in interpersonal skills. While he has spent most of his career designing or delivering training, he was also a Vice-President of Sales of a training and development franchise with operations in 25 markets. Dr. Brennan has designed and delivered sales training in North America, Asia, Europe, Australia and the Middle East. He has been a guest speaker at numerous national and regional professional conferences. When Microsoft wanted Best Practices articles on sales for their web site, they called Dr. Brennan. The results are at http://office.microsoft.com/en-us/FX011387391033.aspx His firm’s clients have included Volvo, The Prudential, Merrill Lynch, Eastman Kodak, Gannett, Equifax Europe, the Economist Group and countless small businesses. - Visit John Brennan's Website

David Acheson
David Acheson is the founder of DCJA Consultancy. DCJA Consultancy is a management consultancy business specialising in B2B sales consultancy. They offer bespoke and packaged sales consultancy including Sales Optimisation Review, Interim Sales Management, Sales & Marketing Review, 1:1 Sales & Management Staff Analysis, Management Training, Solution Sales Training, Creation of New Pay Plan, KPI's, run Customer Feedback Campaigns, assist with Recruitment, Coaching, Appraisals and set up Strategic Marketing Campaigns.  David spent his early career in accountancy and then moved into sales in 1982, working in Office Equipment, IT, Advertising, Training, Outsourcing and Consultancy. He has held many Senior Positions in SMBs and Global Organisations including Head of Sales Operations & Head of Business Development. His knowledge, skills and great experience of the Sales Industry has led to David making keynote speeches and running educational sessions to key businesses through organisations including The Chamber of Commerce and Business Link. - Visit David Acheson's Website

Leanne Hoagland-Smith
Are your sales where you want them to be? Will you be one of the few who achieves sales or business success or one of the many who have failed to change? Are you tired of being told you are like everyone else? Then you may find my first book on sales of interest. Be the Red Jacket in the Sea of Gray Suits, The Keys to Unlocking Sales available at Amazon or at http://www.processspecialist.com/red-jacket.htm. This book is a reflection of my no-nonsense approach to improving sales to overall business results. If you are truly committed to making sustainable changes, then I can help you secure a positive return on your investment because I focus on executable solutions not telling you the problems you already know you have. From training to corporate (group) coaching to executive one on one coaching, my approach is to assess, create awareness, build a goal driven action plan and then execute. The bottom line question is "Not do you or your employees know it, but do you or they want to do it?" Please call for a free strategy session at 219.759.5601. - Visit Leanne Hoagland-Smith's Website

John Alexander
John has taught keyword research and SEO skills to small groups of business owners and Webmasters from over 80 different countries world wide since 2002. John is also the Director of Search Engine Academy ; Co-director of Training at Search Engine Workshops offering live, SEO Workshops with his partner SEO educator Robin Nobles, author of the very first comprehensive online search engine marketing courses at SEO Training Online and the SEO Workshop Resource Center.
I look forward to hearing from you! - Visit John Alexander's Website

Anne Barr
Anne Barr has over 26 years experience in sales and marketing, six years as a franchisee. She has assisted over 367 business owners and purchasers to achieve their goals in career change, transition and exit strategy. She holds the designation of Certified Franchise Executive from the International Franchise Association, Certified Business Intermediary from the International Business Brokers Association and Board Certified Broker from the Texas Association of Business Brokers. Anne is active in professional organizations, networking groups and volunteers for non-profit entities. As owner/operator of four successful businesses, Anne has proven people skills and enjoys helping clients find the right "fit" in business ownership. Visit www.FranchiseOpportunitySpecialist.com for more information about me and my company. - Visit Anne Barr's Website

Joe Dager
Joe Dager is President of Business901, a progressive coaching company providing no-nonsense direction in areas such as Lean Six Sigma Marketing and organized referral marketing. What others say: In the past 20 years, Joe and I have collaborated on many difficult issues. Joe’s ability to combine his expertise with “out of the box” thinking is unsurpassed. He has always delivered quickly, cost effectively and with ingenuity. A brilliant mind that is always a pleasure to work with.” - James R. If you want to learn more about Business901, start a conversation with us. We can be found @ Web/Blog: Business901.com Web/Blog: FundingYourNonprofit.com LinkedIn Profile Follow me on Twitter - Visit Joe Dager's Website


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Robert Neely
(Visit Robert's Website) Professional Change Leader, Sales and Marketing Interim Manager, specialising in startups, turnarounds and M&A.  Find out how Robert can help YOU at my Interim Sales and Marketing, Change Leader web site.

If you want to set up a high-performing sales function, lift flagging sales, reorganise, or open new markets, I can help you.  Contact me for an informal discussion.

I specialise in Change Management, especially CRM.

In Sales Management, I work in Public Sector, IT, Telecomms and Retail Sectors, with international experience, Direct and Channel Sales, Call Center, Sales Performance Management and Sales Coaching.

In Marketing, I have in-depth knowledge and experience of distance selling, including catalogue and online marketing including SEO and SEM, segmentation and direct marketing.

I am happy to discuss recent assignments and give examples of relevant experience, icluding references where appropriate.

Why not contact me and see if I can help you?


Robert Neely is a Gold author on EvanCarmichael.com
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