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Dream A Little Dream With Me

Written by: Jeff Belyea

Article Overview: An "inner view" as a goal achievement strategy.

Dream A Little Dream With Me

Dream A Little Dream With Me.

When I was very young I lived in a fantasy world of movie-inspired adventure. The world was my ripe watermelon (I don’t like oysters), sweet and juicy and satisfying. As I grew older and submitted to the social coercion of fitting in, and acting normal, I slipped into the quiet desperation that most men suffer. I played the game, but I was never “in” the game. I joined the parade of worker bees, hoping for nothing more than middle-class success. I was bored, constipated and pretty much miserable. Oh, I took the typical excursions of sex, drugs and rock ‘n’ roll. Um, maybe I was a little more indulgent than the average bear, but I stayed mostly in the mainstream and out of any real trouble - criminal and otherwise.

Then, as I approached 30, the quiet desperation turned to an existential angst that gnawed at me until the pain became so unbearable that I abandoned everyone and everything in my life. I ripped off the nice, respectable, middle class, dressed-for-success persona. Remember the sex, drugs and rock’n’roll thing? Well, those were first stops along the way to what would become a vision quest, and an enlightenment experience that would change my life even more dramatically than the earlier flee.

Now, I didn’t know of any such thing as a vision quest, and I only use that term in retrospect. My simple and primary goal was to escape the choking oppression that I felt. However, the guilt of my slip-out-the-back-Jack move overtook me in a few years. It haunted me in my sober moments, but it really overtook me in about 3 years from the time I left. Life became more than bleak. I wanted to die. I asked to die. My mantra became, “let me die”, until one day I looked heavenward, and asked, “What did I miss?”

The response to that question was to come on July 21, 1975 at about 9:30 in the morning. In the midst of a quiet meditation I experienced what is typically described by NDEs, Near Death Experiencers. I was given a pardon by the governor; I mean THE governor. I was free from guilt, shame, and degradation over my past deeds, and given a new life free from fear and doubt. I happily, make that ecstatically, returned to the mainstream buzz of worker bees. Only this time I found joy in work, joy in relationships, joy , joy, joy. The world was my watermelon (or honeycomb, in this case) once again. And I have stayed in the garden ever since. A little fear and doubt creeps in, but never of the intensity that robs me of my joy or makes me angry for anything more or longer than a ripple in time. But obviously, that’s not the end of the story.

Given this new found freedom and enthusiasm for life, I was dressed-for-success once again. I played the game better than before, and moved through the corporate ranks at virtually every stop. I earned a bunch of degrees and certifications in this and that; thinking that these would enhance and insure my success. And they did…somewhat. But I grew up in a blue-collar world, and my aspirations were limited to what I saw as one step higher on the ladder - a white collar, good-paying job, or a small business of my own. Small was as big as I could think. I would dream, but more like dreams of winning the lottery or being left a inheritance by a rich uncle. I don’t have a rich uncle, but this is a dream, remember.

Then one day in the not too distance past, I woke up. I didn’t want to wait for a rich uncle to die. I wanted to become that rich uncle. But my strategy was flawed. We do not break out of the swarm by becoming better bees, with more degrees. Worker bees never change jobs. Even the snappiest dressers, in corner offices, never become anything more than worker bees. They have grander excursions, bigger honeycombs, a louder buzz, sometimes more vacations (sometimes less)…but they’re still worker bees. They cannot imagine themselves, other than in some fanciful moment, beeing (intentional) anything else. A light bulb came on. No, I didn’t become a moth. But to stay with the small insect metaphor, I became a caterpillar.

We must evolve. We must grow wings and gracefully fly over the brick wall of small-minded thinking, over the corporate wall, and off into the wild blue yonder. We must tap into a vision, into inspired acts of courage, and, if necessary, abandon everyone and everything that limits us and keeps us from our dreams.
Or we can nestle down into our life of quiet desperation. Or we can deny our quiet desperation. Or we can drown the desperation in sex, drugs and B-movies. Evolution is not for everyone. The side effects can kill you. Of course, if you’re happy and you know it, clap your hands. If that didn’t startle you and wake you up, then you just may be one of the fortunate ones, and this story can be filed in the non-applicable draw.

If you’re still reading, you may have a question, like, “How can I evolve?”. Well, like the caterpillar, we are destined to evolve. Everything we need to evolve into a life of peace, love, joy and rich success came with us at birth. The problem is what we have learned since then. The solution is to unlearn and return to our natural birthright. We must die to our old way of thinking, give up all of our misguided presumptions, and untie the knots of social coercion. There are (at least) two ways to do this: shrink or expand.

The way of the shrink: Tell me what’s on your mind. Spill it all out. Keep going. What else? And how do you feel about that? See you next week…and next week…and next week. At some point you may come to the bitter root of your presumptions about life and relationships that keeps growing weeds in your mind and choking out your joy in life. Potentially, out of this will come insights, and a reframing, rethinking about your life strategy, and a new found freedom. Wings.

The way of expansion: One day you feel an inner stirring. Something is missing in your life. You don’t know what. And the feeling gnaws at you until you begin to search for the answer. It’s a mystery, and you don’t have a clue. But you search. You have no choice. Then, one day, in the midst of quiet meditation, or in the midst of a mud-wrestling match, it hits you. Your mind melts. You give up searching completely.
Your head knowledge drops into your heart. And from this seat of wisdom, without words, comes THE answer. A sudden rush of wisdom whooshes in, and you realize that you have wings. A whole new identity that you have never dreamed or imagined is yours, and a whole new world opens up before you…like magic.

Some people make this journey alone. For many, a guide who has made the journey, is of great help. A shrink, a guru, a good book, a gorgeous sunrise, an obnoxious boss; any of these can catapult you over the wall. A walking stick for your journey is best fashioned out of a choice to love. Choose to be a loving, forgiving, grateful person. In the midst of the pain preceding evolution, this ain’t easy, but keep coming back to it. Love is the best walking stick on life’s journey known to man and woman. All of the masters agree. A meditation class can help you attune to the sweet love song in your heart, and open the door to a whole new look at life.

And now, for the practical side (which may not be obvious to some, but you have read this far) of this cosmic dream. Once this truth that sets you free is known, you are truly capable of inspired living. You can become an artist in all that you do, and a master of all you choose to focus your energies on persistently. Trust, no matter what. Let love guide you to your destiny. Do what you love doing, at all costs. The ROI (Return On Investment) puts Wall Street to shame, and puts you in the garden of lush watermelons, milk and honey, for the rest of your days.



Jeff Belyea , developer of Mindgoal Goal Achievement Strategies, is a meditation teacher, writer, and business and personal coach in St. Petersburg, Florida. He can be reached by email at jeff@mindgoal.com His web site at www.mindgoal.com.

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