FOCUS

Everyone knows the value of focus, of concentrated single-minded attention - like keeping your eye on the ball. Yet, how easily we lose focus on our way to the achievement of a goal. That can a sales goal, a personal, business or career goal. Those ol' lions of doubt and fear keep coming up in the form of internal chatter. You know the chatter, "You won't make it. The customer will say 'no'. You're not good enough, fast enough, smart enough,"...or some other "not enough" meant to discourage you. But why is that? Why do those voices persist?

Well, there's all kinds of conjecture; from disfunctional family, to flat feet, to former failures that haunt your thoughts. Who knows for sure? No one. Those lions of fear and doubt serve a purpose. They keep you from attempting to jump a big puddle in your new sneakers. Doubt says, "You might not make it." Fear says, "What will your Mom have to say about ruining the look of those new sneakers?" Fine, so far. But by the time you're an adult, the lions have no business jumping in on every new adventure or new thought you have about going for some goal...or some gold.

So, what's this got to do with focus? A lot. Focus, on its own is a worthwhile verb. But for the purpose of the rest of this article, focus also be used as an acronym: F.O.C.U.S. = Fearless Outrageous Commitment to Unwavering Success. Here's a distinction to think about. I first came across it, listening to a tape by Dr. Barbara Sher. She used smoking, and the goal to quit, as an example. Essentially, she said that there is a big difference between those who "want to quit", and those who "wish they wanted to quit".

Do you have a FOCUS, or do you wish you had a FOCUS? Are you fearlessly outrageously committed to unwavering success, or do you have a lack of courage and a surplus of waver? Let start with the courage issue, and how to get rid of the wishy-washy approach. To do that, we'll first come back to those lions, that discouraging (did you catch that?) chatter and negative self-talk. How do we quiet those rascels down? Now, before you let out that sigh, as though this were a rhetorical question. Stop. There are ways! With a simple process of "inner work", the lions can be tamed.

And here it is, for your reading pleasure, and your lifelong companion:

There are three steps. Step One: Stop and be. Just be quietly aware of the present moment. When the chatter starts up (which it will, in a nanosecond), return to simple quiet awareness - again and again and again. Look around your environment and suspend any internal narrative. After a few attempts at this, you'll notice a palable settling down and inner quiet that naturally moves you into a state of relaxation. Step Two is designed to lengthen the time in Quiet Awareness. Notice your breathing. Notice when you inhale and notice when you exhale. Stay in Quiet Awareness and overlay it with Breath Awareness. This will keep you in Quiet Awareness longer, make it easier to return and prolong the relaxation time. It takes practice. But the results can be astounding.

Sounds too simple. But try it.

One more. Step Three: After a few days, weeks, months or years practicing the Quiet Awareness with Breath Awareness (you'll know when you're ready - maybe), begin to "listen" internally. To localize this internal listening and move it from a vague listening to a stabilized contained listening, listen to your heart. Yes, your heart. A little aside here: The heart has neural cells (brain cells), and depending on who you read, a lot of them. So, listening to your heart may not be all that "cosmic". Also, keep in mind that when we think of someone who is wise, and kind and loving and compassion (those are on your list of good things to own, right?), we don't say they have a good brain. We say they have a good...what? Right. Heart. The heart can offer the brain a "wisdom whisper" that will change your life perspective like a thunderbolt! No words, just a new clarity about who you are, and what your purpose is in this life.

That's it. Quiet Awareness, overlaid with Breath Awareness and later, Heart Awareness. To describe what will happen is impossible. OK, I'll give it college try: You will have discovered a wonderful stress management tool that at a minimum, is a way to quiet those lions, that will pay handsome dividends in your business and personal relationships. The maximum is definitely beyond words and must be experienced directly. Enlightenment is bandied around a little too blithely these days Now you can move on to the "Outrageous". An anon quote: Be outrageous. It's the only place that isn't crowded. This is tied to "Commitment". You don't really need to have "Outrageous Commitment" explained. You know when you're outrageously committed, and you know when you're not. Same with "Unwavering". Now "Success" is something that you might think is different for everyone. Nope.

Same for everyone. Oh, stop shaking your head. What's on your success list? Not the same as on mine, or your best friends, or your bosses, or your subordinates. But...what are the lists about?

Yes, you in the back of the room? Right...happiness and contentment. That's the measure. Same for everyone. See? Good for you.

PS: To help you remember the relaxation, or meditation, process, you might use the non-word "Q,Baha" as a "mantra" for a while until you can naturally flow with the Quiet Awareness to Breath Awareness to Heart Awareness. Some of my clients like to use "Q" as a...cue. On the inhale, they silently say "Q" and on the exhale, slowly and gently say "Ba...Ha". Have fun.

FOCUS - To learn more about this author, visit Jeff Belyea's Website.

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