Does The Opposite Sex Drive You Crazy?
Does The Opposite Sex Drive You Crazy?
According to Deborah Tannen, author of Talking From 9 To 5: How Women’s and Men’s Conversational Styles Affect Who Gets Heard, men use communication to maintain independence while women use communication to maintain intimacy. Men often speak to establish status or hierarchy within a group, while women speak to connect, express feelings, and build rapport. Tannen labels these styles. Men, in their focus on facts and figures, communicate in report-talk. Women, on the other hand, focus on rapport-talk.
So what does this mean to you in a sales relationship? Simply that if you’re dealing with someone of the opposite sex, you may have different communication styles. To be more effective, adapt your style or simply be more open to the style of the other person. Adjust your approach to better engage the other person. Make sure your conversational style fits the setting. As always, listen carefully and clarify. Don’t assume that you understand or are understood without appropriate probing.
Specifically, if you fit the model described by Tannen (and not all individuals will), if you’re a female salesperson calling on a male prospect:
• Don’t force a man to talk if he’s not ready. Focus your talk on goal-oriented activities, tangible accomplishments or problem-solving.
• Observe and listen, rather than process out loud.
• Be careful to not offer help before it is asked for, doing so may indicate that you don’t have trust in his ability.
• Be more focused on the bottom-line, be succinct.
If you’re a male salesperson calling on a female prospect:
• Ask what you can do to help. It’s a way you can show support.
• Understand that women may process out loud as a way of including others and building relationships.
• Be patient with the stories of your prospect, even when you are anxious to get to the bottom-line. Don’t short-change the opportunity to get to know your prospect.
As with any communication exchange, if you focus on listening and following the signals of the other person, you’ll do fine.
Does The Opposite Sex Drive You Crazy - To learn more about this author, visit Will Turner's Website.
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Effective communication is impacted by gender differences. It’s important to understand that men and women often exhibit different conversational styles. Both styles are equally valid. The goal is to understand the differences, so that you can adapt and communicate more effectively.
According to Deborah Tannen, author of Talking From 9 To 5: How Women’s and Men’s Conversational Styles Affect Who Gets Heard, men use communication to maintain independence while women use communication to maintain intimacy. Men often speak to establish status or hierarchy within a group, while women speak to connect, express feelings, and build rapport. Tannen labels these styles. Men, in their focus on facts and figures, communicate in report-talk. Women, on the other hand, focus on rapport-talk.
So what does this mean to you in a sales relationship? Simply that if you’re dealing with someone of the opposite sex, you may have different communication styles. To be more effective, adapt your style or simply be more open to the style of the other person. Adjust your approach to better engage the other person. Make sure your conversational style fits the setting. As always, listen carefully and clarify. Don’t assume that you understand or are understood without appropriate probing.
Specifically, if you fit the model described by Tannen (and not all individuals will), if you’re a female salesperson calling on a male prospect:
• Don’t force a man to talk if he’s not ready. Focus your talk on goal-oriented activities, tangible accomplishments or problem-solving.
• Observe and listen, rather than process out loud.
• Be careful to not offer help before it is asked for, doing so may indicate that you don’t have trust in his ability.
• Be more focused on the bottom-line, be succinct.
If you’re a male salesperson calling on a female prospect:
• Ask what you can do to help. It’s a way you can show support.
• Understand that women may process out loud as a way of including others and building relationships.
• Be patient with the stories of your prospect, even when you are anxious to get to the bottom-line. Don’t short-change the opportunity to get to know your prospect.
As with any communication exchange, if you focus on listening and following the signals of the other person, you’ll do fine.
Does The Opposite Sex Drive You Crazy - To learn more about this author, visit Will Turner's Website.
Like this article? Share it with your friends
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Kim CastleWith nearly two decades in the advertising and design business, with clients like Domino's Pizza, General Motors, Direct TV, Pedigree, Wolfgang Puck, Higher Octave Music, Hollywood Celebrity Products, Disney, and Paramount, as well as thousands of entrepreneurs around the world define, structure, communicate, and position their business for greater profits, BrandU(R) co-creators Kim Castle and W. Vito Montone discovered that entrepreneurs could experience the same power that big brands command for a fraction of the cost with the world's only process-based results-drive Integral approach to business creation. BrandU(R) is helping entrepreneurs grow with the power of extreme clarity from idea...to brand...to market(TM) and helping one million entrepreneurs become successful and whole so that they can make a difference in the world. Are you one of them? If you want to experience clarity all the way to the bank(TM), get started now at http://www.brandu.com. - Visit Kim Castle's Website |
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