The Most Important Communication Skill?

Guest post by: Paul Donehue
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What do you consider the most important communication skill?

It's common for people to think of communication in terms of speaking, as in the "gift" of gab. But experts and researchers agree that listening is the most important communication skill. It's also the most frequently used communication skill.

For example, a typical study points out that many of us spend 70 to 80 percent of our waking hours communicating; but, of that time, we spend about 9% writing, 16% reading, 30% speaking, and 45% listening.

Unfortunately, studies also confirm that most of us are poor and inefficient listeners.

Here are a few interesting facts about listening challenges, and three things that can improve listening effectiveness.

The first challenge lies in the fact that, on average, thought speed exceeds average speaking speed by three to four times! Thus, due to excess "thought" capacity, our minds tend to wander when we (try to) listen to other people speak.

In addition, there are minimal opportunities for training. Most people will acknowledge they have had much more formal training in other communication skills (writing, reading, speaking) and also find it more difficult to find programs that might help improve listening skills.

Numerous tests also confirm that we are inefficient listeners. Studies show that immediately after listening to a 10-minute oral presentation, the average listener has heard, understood and retained only 50% of what was said. Within 48 hours, that drops off another 50% to a final level of 25% efficiency.

In other words, we tend to comprehend and retain only one fourth of what we hear!

If you'd like to improve your listening skills, here are three ideas based on research conducted locally and at the University of Missouri:

Prepare… Preparation prior to interacting with others is a good way to reduce distraction during communication. If we are less focused on what we will say or ask next (because we've planned ahead), we are able to place more focus on what others are saying.
Ask better questions…Anticipating what others might say, making mental "summaries" while they are speaking and asking good questions to clarify what has been said will enhance our ability to listen and comprehend.
Take notes… Note-taking can improve our listening in several ways. First it uses-up some of the excess thinking capacity described above. The act of writing or noting portions of what has been said also improves our memory of the material… and, of course, we can always refer to our notes if we forget some of it!

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About the Author: Paul Donehue

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A professional and seasoned consultant, coach and trainer, Paul Donehue has made a life's study out of working with and motivating people. His extensive background in sales, management and as an entrepreneur has provided the perfect vehicle for him to interact with and observe the behavior of leaders and professionals in numerous fields, and to see first-hand how many have been able to achieve and surpass their goals. Now president of Paul Charles & Associates, a training and consulting firm specializing in sales, sales management, business communication, marketing communication and business development, Paul regularly conducts on-site and on-line training and coaching programs, and facilitates a wide range of meetings and programs. He has also spoken at many corporate and association events. He is a member of the National Writers Union and The NH Writer's Project, and has co-authored several books; he is also a former director of the Smaller Business Association of New England (SBANE), a two-term Commissioner on the Londonderry Housing & Redevelopment Authority, and has served as a board-member for a number of businesses and organizations. In his highly interactive style, Paul relays stories of innovation, perseverance and success, and presents new ideas in a positive manner that inspires others to build upon strengths while adopting fresh perspectives and a spirit of self-improvement.
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