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Communication Skills - How to be a Better Listener

Communication Skills - How to be a Better Listener

One guaranteed way to annoy people is to appear not to be listening to what they say. The key word is appear. You might be paying attention, but it might not seem that way. What you need to display is active listening. There are some barriers which can get in the way of listening, and you need to be aware of a couple of these -

Prejudices

This is two-sided. One is the feelings (positive or negative) that you have about the other party to the communication. The other is how they feel about you. It's vital to listen without prejudice.

Brain speed

Most people speak at between 120/180 words per minute. At the same time, your brain works at 500/550 wpm. Therefore you need to concentrate fully on what's being said - and also learn not to interrupt simply to speed things along. You need to avoid the situation where your mind wanders to fill up this “empty space” between the speaking and listening speeds


Try the following "active listening" techniques -

# Teach yourself to carefully listen to the content - and to watch the body language which surrounds it. Check that the two messages are the same - if not, what the body is saying is likely to be the more accurate. Be careful not to focus on how something is said - thereby missing on out on what has been said

# Listen to understand - rather than simply to respond. If, whilst listening, in your mind you're forming a statement, then you're getting ready to respond. If you are forming questions, then you're trying to understand

# Provide verbal signals - sound like "uh-huh" "mmm" - words like "yep" "I see" "go on" "really" - demonstrate that you are listening

# Provide non-verbal signals - such as eye contact, smiling, nodding, leaning forward, tilting your head slightly forward and to one side etc.

# Check your comprehension - summarize the other person's key points and ask them to confirm that you have correctly gathered the information

# Repetition - repeat their last sentence or key points back to them - and then follow this with an inquiring question for further information

So, work at developing your listening skills - and enjoy the results





Communication Skills How to be a Better Listener - To learn more about this author, visit Gordon Veniard's Website.

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Gordon Veniard
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GORDON VENIARD thanks you for your interest in these articles He has been delivering training events - and creating and providing valuable development materials - for more than 20 years Gordon covers a wide range of business communication, promotion, sales, negotiation, customer service, leadership and management subjects. He has worked with major companies and organisations; spoken at many conferences and seminars - always adding good humor to valuable advice To find out more, Gordon would be pleased if you would take a moment to visit his new website: www.thevenwor ks.com. You can register for his free business tips newsletter; and download some valuable freebies (including a copyable, free-to-use "to-do" list) If you have any queries or questions you would like Gordon to answer, please email: gordo n@thevenworks.com Thanks again - please enjoy - and feel free to share - any of these articles which are of use to you and your colleagues
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