Negotiation Word Power - Part One

Consider how people see themselves - and use the words to fit...


Your first consideration when dealing with others is to try and work out how they see themselves. You can then tie the language you use to their impressions – and to avoid using any words and phrases that might switch them off. Equally, if you understand how you see yourself, you can then ensure you don’t simply use language you find attractive

It’s likely that most people would consider themselves to behave in an ethical, honourable, honest way. They would be unlikely to admit (even, often, to themselves) any prejudices they might hold. People will often believe themselves to be more intelligent than the “average”. These are the absolute basics of such self-impressions

By watching and listening to the other party to your sales or negotiation situation, you can start to build the picture they have of themselves



How to increase people’s receptiveness


Flattery works – along as you don’t make it too obvious! So, the use of words and phrases can help develop an impression of “feeling good about myself” within the other party. Here are some typical examples:

• “You have a reputation for being a tough negotiator”
• “I know you’re not easily impressed by…”
• “As an expert in this area, do you…”
• “I know you’re always receptive to new ideas”
• “As a successful business-owner…”
• “I know I can count on your word in all these things”
• “I appreciate you like to consider all proposals very carefully”
• “With your many years of experience, tell me…”

Only use phrases you feel comfortable using (and to the appropriate “receiver”). The above are examples, you’ll be able to think of more



Allow people to carefully interpret – where possible


In general terms, when you conclude a sale or deal, you surely want there to be no ambiguity at all about the agreement. But, as you are discussing different areas before this point, you don’t always want to be definite. It can be of value to make “suggestions” for debate, discussion or amendment later. Therefore, there is a value in having a range of “possibility” phrases you can adapt & use as appropriate. Some examples:

• “Sometimes, it’s possible to…”
• “It might be that…”
• “It’s often the case that…”
• “Mostly, we tend to…”
• “It’s possible that…”
• “It’s rare for…”
• “It’s quite likely that…”
• “… can happen”

You might use these if you are not sure what can be achieved – or want to give that impression to the other party. But, be careful, not to let such words or phrases slip into your conversation when it’s time to firm-up the negotiation position or conclude a deal or sale!



(Continues in part two)

Negotiation Word Power - Part One - To learn more about this author, visit Gordon Veniard's Website.

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