Nice or Honest?
Nice or Honest?
After laying it all on the line they wait for my judgment…
I ask, “Do you want me to nice or honest?”
It’s become a ritual at Northern Chi Martial Arts that the students will ask for honesty over kindness. I like that! Not that I enjoy dispensing brutal criticism, it’s just that honest criticism is necessary for improvement.
Can honest criticism be positive? Absolutely!
One of the duties of a teacher, coach or manager is to access performance and deliver clear, honest criticism. Positive criticism is the most powerful tool for improved performance.
Think about how the human brain operates. It’s worth noting that we’ve created computers in our own image. Whatever we put in is what we’re going to get out. The human mind works the same way; we are constantly programming ourselves and it’s up to us to input data that’s going to produce the results we want.
Let’s go back to the “dojo” for an example. Let’s say a student is locking his legs and losing his balance. A valid criticism would be to simply tell this student, “Don’t lock your legs.” If I told you not to lock your legs, what are you going to think about? Most people would now be thinking about locking the legs. I call this a “negative correction.” I’ve also found that a negative correction often causes the student to repeat the same error you’re trying to correct. The mind is on the error rather than a correction.
What if I say, “Be sure to bend your knees”? Now the student’s mind is directed toward an action that produces the desired result; I call this a “positive correction.” The positive correction is the most efficient and effective technique for producing improvement.
Some teachers and managers are afraid that positive correction is too “soft”; that somehow the criticism won’t be taken seriously without some punch. You can be just as passionate about a positive correction as a negative correction. If it needs to be loud, fine, just make it positive. Of course, sometimes quiet will produce a stronger impression.
I once saw a program produced by NFL films that profiled two coaches correcting their respective players for dropping a pass. They edited back and forth from one coach to the other to demonstrate their contrasting styles. Both coaches were screaming at their players, however, there was one drastic contrast in their messages.
The first coach jumped all over his player screaming, “What’s wrong with you? How could you drop that ball?” The second coach was every bit as bombastic in his delivery, but he was shouting, “You’re a professional. What are you supposed to do with that ball?”
Just like the computer, “garbage in, garbage out”.
The first player sat on the bench with his head in his hands. He returned to the game and dropped another ball. I can only guess what was in his mind, but I do know the mind responds most powerfully to the questions we input. Ask yourself “what’s wrong with me?” and the mind will very quickly come up with a list. Ask someone else “what’s wrong with you” and you’re inducing a negative thinking process. When you’re in a position of authority or leadership, this can become a very powerful negative impression.
The second player responded to his coach’s question, “What are you supposed to do with the ball?” by yelling “Catch it, Coach”. This exchange went on, “You’re supposed to catch the ball?”
“Yes Coach.”
“Then go out there and catch the ball.”
This is a great example of positive correction. Of course, the second player went out and made his next catch. He had a much better probability of success as he was programmed with a positive outcome. His mind was on catching the ball, the desired outcome, rather than any possible negative outcomes.
Criticism and correction are necessary tools of management and leadership. Positive correction is the most powerful tool for improved performance. Of course, in the workplace positive correction will directly impact productivity and profitability.
Developing this tool takes a lot of patience and discipline. The results are worth the effort!
Nice or Honest - To learn more about this author, visit Jim Bouchard's Website.
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I’m leading one of my martial arts classes on a hot summer afternoon. The air conditioner is working full-tilt, but only teases us with an occasional whiff of cool air. The students are fully focused and sweating through a set of choreographed exercises we call “kata”.
After laying it all on the line they wait for my judgment…
I ask, “Do you want me to nice or honest?”
It’s become a ritual at Northern Chi Martial Arts that the students will ask for honesty over kindness. I like that! Not that I enjoy dispensing brutal criticism, it’s just that honest criticism is necessary for improvement.
Can honest criticism be positive? Absolutely!
One of the duties of a teacher, coach or manager is to access performance and deliver clear, honest criticism. Positive criticism is the most powerful tool for improved performance.
Think about how the human brain operates. It’s worth noting that we’ve created computers in our own image. Whatever we put in is what we’re going to get out. The human mind works the same way; we are constantly programming ourselves and it’s up to us to input data that’s going to produce the results we want.
Let’s go back to the “dojo” for an example. Let’s say a student is locking his legs and losing his balance. A valid criticism would be to simply tell this student, “Don’t lock your legs.” If I told you not to lock your legs, what are you going to think about? Most people would now be thinking about locking the legs. I call this a “negative correction.” I’ve also found that a negative correction often causes the student to repeat the same error you’re trying to correct. The mind is on the error rather than a correction.
What if I say, “Be sure to bend your knees”? Now the student’s mind is directed toward an action that produces the desired result; I call this a “positive correction.” The positive correction is the most efficient and effective technique for producing improvement.
Some teachers and managers are afraid that positive correction is too “soft”; that somehow the criticism won’t be taken seriously without some punch. You can be just as passionate about a positive correction as a negative correction. If it needs to be loud, fine, just make it positive. Of course, sometimes quiet will produce a stronger impression.
I once saw a program produced by NFL films that profiled two coaches correcting their respective players for dropping a pass. They edited back and forth from one coach to the other to demonstrate their contrasting styles. Both coaches were screaming at their players, however, there was one drastic contrast in their messages.
The first coach jumped all over his player screaming, “What’s wrong with you? How could you drop that ball?” The second coach was every bit as bombastic in his delivery, but he was shouting, “You’re a professional. What are you supposed to do with that ball?”
Just like the computer, “garbage in, garbage out”.
The first player sat on the bench with his head in his hands. He returned to the game and dropped another ball. I can only guess what was in his mind, but I do know the mind responds most powerfully to the questions we input. Ask yourself “what’s wrong with me?” and the mind will very quickly come up with a list. Ask someone else “what’s wrong with you” and you’re inducing a negative thinking process. When you’re in a position of authority or leadership, this can become a very powerful negative impression.
The second player responded to his coach’s question, “What are you supposed to do with the ball?” by yelling “Catch it, Coach”. This exchange went on, “You’re supposed to catch the ball?”
“Yes Coach.”
“Then go out there and catch the ball.”
This is a great example of positive correction. Of course, the second player went out and made his next catch. He had a much better probability of success as he was programmed with a positive outcome. His mind was on catching the ball, the desired outcome, rather than any possible negative outcomes.
Criticism and correction are necessary tools of management and leadership. Positive correction is the most powerful tool for improved performance. Of course, in the workplace positive correction will directly impact productivity and profitability.
Developing this tool takes a lot of patience and discipline. The results are worth the effort!
Nice or Honest - To learn more about this author, visit Jim Bouchard's Website.
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Power Play - Jim Bouchard is author and founder of Dynamic Components of Personal Power, and the founder of Northern Chi Martial Arts Centers. Jim combines his experience as a professional martial artist, entrepreneur and speaker to share his philosophy on power for personal and professional success.
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