As human beings I am certain that we all have at one point in time or another fallen into either one of these two categories.
Your question reminds me of a story I had once read about Willard Scott the famed weatherman.
Early in his career, Willard worked for a boss whom he considered to be both unreasonable and incompetent. In fact the acrimony between the two was so great that Willard and his partner's hit program was moved to what was affectionately called the "graveyard shift" time slot.
Willard was of course furious and came within a breath of quitting. (Think what that might have done to his career given its eventual course to stardom.)
Instead he made the decision to buckle down and made the best of a difficult situation ultimately taking his program to the number one spot at the station.
Not long afterwards, he and his wife attended a company function in which his nemesis' wife was also present. After talking with her for a short time Willard found her to be a lovely, intelligent and personable woman. He concluded that if a woman like this could be married to his boss, his boss could not be as bad as he thought. From that moment on he made a concentrated effort to both understand and build a relationship with his boss. In essence he recognized that he too had contributed to the tension and took responsibility for making an effort to improve their rapport.
Over a period of time he and his boss developed a close and lasting friendship, which even today (many decades later) is one of the best and strongest relationships Willard has ever had.
The moral of the story is that rarely do we see the real person behind the outward or public-facing persona. And when we consider our own shortcomings in the equation, we should realize that we have a part to play in either making a relationship better or making it worse.
Competent Jerk versus Lovable Fool? (Network Member Question) - To learn more about this author, visit Jon Hansen's Website.
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