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Personal Responsibility: What Entitles You?

Guest post by: Michael Hume

Article Overview: ... What I got to take away with me was a bloody leg, a great story to tell, and another pointed object lesson on the power of maintaining an attitude of self-reliance and personal responsibility.

Personal Responsibility: What Entitles You?

Victims Feel Entitled; Entrepreneurs Feel Obliged It was about two-and-a-half years ago, and I was riding my bicycle toward the airport in Palm Springs. (It's a 35-minute bike ride from our place, good exercise, and I save a few bucks on cab fare.) Right outside the gate of our community, I turned left and headed down the wide sidewalk.

Now, I should explain that the neighborhood has these great wide sidewalks - probably a good 10-12 feet across - because a lot of people use them. There are lots of walkers, bicyclists, roller-bladers, you name it... it's California, after all. And to accomodate those on wheels, all the sidewalks have nice, wide cut-outs so you can glide smoothly onto the street to cross it.

Anyway, on this particular day, I was just getting up to speed when I saw a woman walking her dog just ahead, between me and the corner. I didn't want to startle the woman, so I slowed down and hollered "on your right," so she'd know I was coming.

At this point, I should explain that she was using the entire width of the sidewalk. There was not enough room for me to pass her on either side without dumping myself off the steep curb (or into the bushes on the other side), so I was going to need a little more space to comfortably pass.

When I hollered, she turned her head, but didn't make any other changes. She wasn't wearing headphones, or anything, and I'm pretty sure she heard me. I hollered again, all the while drawing closer... still no movement. Finally, I was right up behind her, so I slowed almost to a stop and worked the bike carefully around to the right of her dog, addressing the dog in a low a soothing voice.

It wasn't soothing enough. The dog started snarling, and barking. She might've heard me approaching, but he clearly hadn't.

At this point I was hoping the lady would choke-up on the leash a bit, but instead she actually let out some slack so the dog could catch up with my slow-moving bicycle.

He took a good chunk out of my left calf.

This was painful, but the shock of it was what I remember most. I finally climbed off the bike, and asked her if I could get her name and number in case the dog bite became infected. I wasn't planning to do anything with it, except maybe call her later to let her know that nice young man bitten by her dog was OK (well, I was in my late 40s, but still, I'd guess, about twenty years younger than she).

To this day, I have a hard time believing her response.

"No, I most certainly will not give you my name," she huffed - and I mean, she really huffed. "What do you mean, give you my name?"

"Well, I just don't know whether I'm going to need a doctor," I said, the blood beginning to pool in my sneaker.

"You have no business riding that bicycle on a sidewalk," she continued. "No business!"

I was speechless.

"What in the world are you thinking? Get that thing off the sidewalk!"

This went on for awhile. This lady seemed genuinely angry! Meanwhile, the dog is still howling, she's not controlling him, I'm bleeding, and they're not gonna hold my flight.

I finally got my speechless self back on the bike, made it to the airport, got some alcohol at an aid station there, fixed myself up, and enjoyed a nice glass of wine on my flight. I still have a couple of faint puncture marks on my calf, but the incident went largely un-thought-of after that.

Except this:

Wow.

Seriously?

I remember the airport policewoman who gave me the rubbing alcohol asking what'd happened, and then offering to file a complaint against the lady. "You had every right to be there, and she's broken the law." I think I laughed. "No, that's not necessary, I'm sure I just startled her and her dog. It's nobody's fault."

It's nobody's fault!

As Homer Simpson famously said once, "it's just a bunch of stuff that happened."

Today I think the memory serves as another reminder of the stark attitudinal divide in the U.S. these days between victims and entrepreneurs. As an entrepreneur, I don't expect anyone else to take care of me, and my first thought is to my obligations to my fellow person - I didn't want to startle the lady, I only wanted to later put her fears to rest, etc. I'm not always at my best, but I give myself credit for most of the time being just that type of nice young man. But as a "victim," or at least a person who was clearly in victim mode at that moment, this lady not only felt no remorse for letting her dog bite me, she felt it necessary to scold and blame me for the whole thing.

Wow.

I want to encourage you to be an entrepreneur. You are not entitled to the whole sidewalk, nor to allow your dog to bite someone, nor to yell it them if he does. You are obliged to be polite, give lots of warning if you're about to get in someone's way, think about their feelings, and take care of your own wounds if you get yourself bitten.

Sure, I think you have to stand up for yourself sometimes. But what was I going to do, sue her? Better just get to the airport.

I don't know what happened to that lady, or that dog (must've had a bitter taste in his mouth for the whole day)... and it doesn't much concern me. If the tables had been reversed, I'd have taken away a huge load of guilt about my dog biting someone and would not have rested until I knew he was OK. But the tables weren't reversed, and what I got to take away with me was a bloody leg, a great story to tell, and another pointed object lesson on the power of maintaining an attitude of self-reliance and personal responsibility.

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Article Tags: health wealth and happiness, personal responsibility, successful entrepreneurs



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