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How Would You Rate Your B-B-A Ability?

Guest post by: Elizabeth J. Macarthur

Article Overview: B-B-A is an acronym for bounce back ability. Your bounce back ability is the amount of time it takes you to move through, recover from, or let go of the negativity attached to any given circumstance or situation. Things that stand in our way of our B-B-A are things like resentment, guilt, shame, unforgiveness, etc. The quicker we can move through our negative emotions, the faster our B-B-A is. Check out the B-B-A Scale in the following article to determine where you are at and where you can go from here.

How Would You Rate Your B-B-A Ability?

B-B-A is an acronym for bounce back ability. Your bounce back ability is the amount of time it takes you to move through, recover from, or let go of the negativity attached to any given circumstance or situation. Sometimes life likes to through us curveballs when we least expect it. We can be going along and things can be going pretty good and then something happens that throws everything off track. Sometimes it can throw us off track for a very long time and affect everything in our life. It is not the circumstances or situations that determine who we are at any give time. It is how we choose to deal with the situation or circumstance at any given time.

We do seem to be very good at hanging on to negative emotions attached to past negative experiences, i.e. the victim roll. Before I learned how to let go, I had been hanging onto things like resentment, hatred, unforgiveness, poor me attitude, etc. for 15, even 20 years. Not what I would call great B-B-A.

So let's take a look at the B-B-A scale that I have created.

Are you a "0"? Someone who would rate a zero would have no bounce back ability at all. Without any B-B-A, we would not be able to function or survive in the world. We would be dead. I point this out as a way of letting you know that if you are reading this than you must be alive and therefore, you do have some B-B-A whether you feel like you do or not.

Are you a "1"? As a "1", you would be totally caught up in such behaviours as always feeling like the victim, nobody understands or likes me, everything always happens to me, I never get a break, etc. Forgiveness is not a behaviour you participate in and are hanging onto everything negative that has happened to you. You are full of resentment, anger, bitterness, etc. You are always very down and negative.

Are you a "2"? As a "2", you would be the type of person who was really great at hiding your true feelings. Although you were able to put on a good front, always had a smile on your face, on the inside you are a mess (frustrated, hurt, resentful, envious of other, etc.). You would always find yourself in situations that never seem to go the way you needed and/or wanted them to and left you with more feelings of hurt, frustration and resentment. However you would start to be asking yourself "Why?" and this would help to move you into category 3.

Are you a "3"? As a "3", you would be starting to realize that this is not the life you want to live, one full of resentment, frustration, hurt, loneliness, etc. You start to become open to looking for and attracting ways of feeling better. You are ready to start letting go of some of the hurt and resentment, thereby starting to build up your B-B-A. You discover inner strength that you were not aware you had and take some very big steps forward to releasing those negative pieces that are interfering with your B-B-A.

Are you a "4"? As a "4", you are now making great progress. Through your own courage, strength and B-B-A ability, you are releasing many, many, past negative emotions and beliefs that have been plaguing you. You can now start to build on what is positive in your life and start attracting more of that. The process of forgiveness has started both with others and yourself. You are even more determined now to get through the unhappiness and mover into a happier existence. You are also experiencing and seeing the results of your hard work.

Are you a "5"? As a "5", you would be what I like to call a "work in progress". Incredible shifts have been made and the past has been dealt with. You have learned and are continuing to learn many new life skills that are allowing you to sift more quickly though the negative and to create forgiveness more quickly. You have gone from a B-B-A ranging in years to now ranging in days or even hours. You are much stronger as a person and that smile that is now on your face is a much truer reflection on how you are feeling on the inside. You are much calmer and your coping skills have reached new heights. Change in your life has become a good thing as you are now making the necessary changes to create the life you want to live. Life has become good and you now feel much more in control of things. You feel much lighter and peaceful from the inside out.

Are you a "6"? As a "6", you have reached new heights of life. Your B-B-A is now minutes, if not seconds. You no longer take on other people's resentment, anger, frustration or allow others to abuse you mentally, emotionally, verbally, etc. You are strong and confident in who you are, the direction you are going and no longer allow other people's opinions of you or your life interfere in your life. Life is very good, peaceful, flowing and things are working out for you. You now feel free from all of the restraints that were previously holding you back. You have a taste of your own freedom and like it very much.

Those who have reached the status of a "6" have an innate ability to process negativity very quickly. I just want to emphasize here the difference between stuffing and not feeling your feelings and being able to move through them very quickly. As a "6" status, you can identify, feel, move through and forgive at a very quick rate which can sometimes look like to others that you have ignored or stuff your own feelings.

As we move through the healing process, you may see glimpses of yourself in more than one category. This is quite common as I believe we are always a "work in progress". Sometimes we can move up to the next category and then something will happen that will trigger old habits or behaviours for us and we can slip back into a lower category. However, the beauty of now having new skills and information is that we will not stay there for long. As soon as we recognize or notice that we have slipped, we do have the skills to immediately pull ourselves back up again.

I have, throughout my life, spent time in all of the categories. I am most excited now to be operating out of the sixth category 95% of the time. For most situations that occur in my life I am able to move very quickly through them and my B-B-A ranges in the few minutes.

There are still some things that happen that totally take me off guard and reduces my B-B-A to hours. I experienced such a situation last week where something came out of left field to interfere with the flow of a projection I was working on. It definitely knocked me off my feet and it took me several hours to move through the emotions I attached to it. However, by the next morning, I was right back on track and moving forward regardless of what appeared to have been a setback.

It does take work to stay at stage 6 until all of our old behaviours have been completely and utterly dissolved of any negative emotional attachment. With this accomplished we can move through life effortlessly and seamlessly with a flow of peacefulness and a true, authentic happiness. That is the ultimate and my ultimate goal.

How do we make this happen? Keep putting your intention out there that this is what you want to happen and then pay attention to the things that land in from of you like books, workshops, seminars, websites, people, etc. that can help and support you in your healing journey to authentic happiness.

That's how I did it even though at the time I did not realize that was what I was doing. I just kept making decisions that I wanted my life to be better, that I wanted the pain and unhappiness to stop and I wanted to be happy. And then when a workshop or book appeared in front of me and felt right, I signed up for the course or I bought the book and read it. Each piece played a major role in moving me forward, bit by bit.

I have always loved this quote as it perfectly described my journey. I do not know the author but it goes like this: "How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time." So how do we move ourselves through the categories (move towards authentic happiness), one step at a time!

Make a decision today to move yourself to the next category and then pay close attention to the support/information that shows up to make it happen.

With love and gratitude,

Elizabeth

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Article Tags: acronym, amount of time, bounce, circumstance, guilt shame, negative emotions, negativity, resentment



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