Is My Happiness Where I Really Think It is?
Is My Happiness Where I Really Think It is?
What would you say if I told you, “Happiness, and I mean authentic happiness, was YOUR birthright.” You would probably tell me that I was crazy or delusional because that has not been your experience, and probably not the experience of many, if any, of your friends or family.
You are probably thinking that happiness does not exist for you or at least you haven’t been able to find it yet. Or maybe you are one of the lucky ones that have already mastered the art of true happiness.
For many years it was not my experience. For years I thought that happiness was one of those fluff words that really didn’t mean anything or was just for other people, not me. I pretended I was happy so I didn’t have to deal with whatever was making me unhappy.
In fact, I did such a great job pretending that I had actually convinced myself I was happy even though not much ever seemed to work out for me in my life the way I wanted it to. And if anyone dared to challenge that I wasn’t happy, I would defend my happiness to the hilt by justifying my life. Sound familiar? Having any connectors?
Now, that’s not to say that there wasn’t some happiness in my life because there was. There has to be some happiness to keep us moving forward. However, there was far more unhappy moments than happy moments.
I eventually reached a point where having more unhappy moments than happy moments just didn’t seem right or fair to me. I knew I was a good person and figured I deserved more. So I made a decision to set out to tip the balance of the scales to more happy moments and less unhappy moments.
I know it’s like a balancing act, and it is up to me to determine which way I want the scales to tip. I get to determine that, to control the tipping of the scales. And no one else gets a say in it unless I give them permission to determine which way the scales are tipped.
And I have to tell you, when I made the decision to do something about my own unhappiness and took responsibility for me, that’s when things really started to change and get better. That’s when I stepped up to the plate and took my power of choice back.
Now, I know you are probably thinking things right now like, “But you don’t know my situation. You don’t understand. That’s easy for you to say. That’s not my life.” And you would be justified in thinking that based on your life experiences to date.
There is no doubt that there is a lot of negativity out there, a lot of bad things happening. We are totally surrounded by it. However, something we continue to forget or neglect is that there are a lot of great positive things out there and we are surrounded by good things also.
We tend to only see or create that which we are focusing on the most. So if I am focusing on the negative or unhappiness, I will create and attract more of that. Likewise, if I am focusing on the positive and happiness, I will create and attract more of the positive things going on.
I have often wondered what would happen if newscasters and newspapers reported only the positive news instead of the negative news. I know that would go a long way towards shifting the scales in supporting us to believe we could create a happier world to live in. And it would also support us in recognizing that there are a lot of great things happening for others out there, and can happen for us as well.
Happiness Survey
Below are 10 true or false questions for you to consider. This is an opportunity for you to check in with yourself and what you are thinking in regards to your own level of happiness.
The more honestly you answer the questions, the more you will gain from the exercise. Quite often it is the first answer that we think of that is the most accurate, however sometimes we will doubt our first answer and want to go with another answer.
Trust your first answer to be the right one for you and see what happens.
(1) I want to believe that I deserve to be happy but struggle with believing it will ever happen for me. True False
(2) I need a shot of happiness injected directly into my life right now to take away some of the stress so I can breathe a sigh of relief. True False
(3) I notice that other people seem to be happy and are living great lives, but I don’t know how to do that for myself or where to start. True False
(4) I am sick and tired of being sick and tired of not understanding and wondering why happiness seems to elude me no matter what I do. True False
(5) I believe that my happiness is determined by others and outside circumstances, therefore I believe that I have very little to no control over my own happiness. True False
(6) I am just waiting for that one more thing to happen and then I’ll be happy whether it is in my personal life or professional life. True False
(7) I know I am a good person and want to believe that good things should happen for me. True False
(8) I believe that it is normal to suffer, to experience adversity, to live through hard times and pay my dues so that happiness will come later. True False
(9) I have no idea what it even means to be happy, what it looks like, what it feels like, or how it should show itself. It’s been too long since I have had happy moments. True False
(10) I don’t have time right now to be happy. My life is too busy. I’m too busy working, taking care of the children, too busy just living and making ends meet to be worried about being happy. True False
If you have answered True to any of the above statements, you are in the same boat as most other people. And you will probably want a copy of my “Five Tools to Moving Towards Happiness.”
Thank you for taking the time to read my article and I look forward to hearing from you. And remember, “As the negative goes, the positive flows.” Elizabeth J. Macarthur
Is My Happiness Where I Really Think It is - To learn more about this author, visit Elizabeth J. Macarthur's Website.
Like this article? Share it with your friends
Do you have this feeling or inkling that maybe, just maybe, life is supposed to be easier or happier than what it is? You know it sounds logical but you just don’t know how to access it?
What would you say if I told you, “Happiness, and I mean authentic happiness, was YOUR birthright.” You would probably tell me that I was crazy or delusional because that has not been your experience, and probably not the experience of many, if any, of your friends or family.
You are probably thinking that happiness does not exist for you or at least you haven’t been able to find it yet. Or maybe you are one of the lucky ones that have already mastered the art of true happiness.
For many years it was not my experience. For years I thought that happiness was one of those fluff words that really didn’t mean anything or was just for other people, not me. I pretended I was happy so I didn’t have to deal with whatever was making me unhappy.
In fact, I did such a great job pretending that I had actually convinced myself I was happy even though not much ever seemed to work out for me in my life the way I wanted it to. And if anyone dared to challenge that I wasn’t happy, I would defend my happiness to the hilt by justifying my life. Sound familiar? Having any connectors?
Now, that’s not to say that there wasn’t some happiness in my life because there was. There has to be some happiness to keep us moving forward. However, there was far more unhappy moments than happy moments.
I eventually reached a point where having more unhappy moments than happy moments just didn’t seem right or fair to me. I knew I was a good person and figured I deserved more. So I made a decision to set out to tip the balance of the scales to more happy moments and less unhappy moments.
I know it’s like a balancing act, and it is up to me to determine which way I want the scales to tip. I get to determine that, to control the tipping of the scales. And no one else gets a say in it unless I give them permission to determine which way the scales are tipped.
And I have to tell you, when I made the decision to do something about my own unhappiness and took responsibility for me, that’s when things really started to change and get better. That’s when I stepped up to the plate and took my power of choice back.
Now, I know you are probably thinking things right now like, “But you don’t know my situation. You don’t understand. That’s easy for you to say. That’s not my life.” And you would be justified in thinking that based on your life experiences to date.
There is no doubt that there is a lot of negativity out there, a lot of bad things happening. We are totally surrounded by it. However, something we continue to forget or neglect is that there are a lot of great positive things out there and we are surrounded by good things also.
We tend to only see or create that which we are focusing on the most. So if I am focusing on the negative or unhappiness, I will create and attract more of that. Likewise, if I am focusing on the positive and happiness, I will create and attract more of the positive things going on.
I have often wondered what would happen if newscasters and newspapers reported only the positive news instead of the negative news. I know that would go a long way towards shifting the scales in supporting us to believe we could create a happier world to live in. And it would also support us in recognizing that there are a lot of great things happening for others out there, and can happen for us as well.
Happiness Survey
Below are 10 true or false questions for you to consider. This is an opportunity for you to check in with yourself and what you are thinking in regards to your own level of happiness.
The more honestly you answer the questions, the more you will gain from the exercise. Quite often it is the first answer that we think of that is the most accurate, however sometimes we will doubt our first answer and want to go with another answer.
Trust your first answer to be the right one for you and see what happens.
(1) I want to believe that I deserve to be happy but struggle with believing it will ever happen for me. True False
(2) I need a shot of happiness injected directly into my life right now to take away some of the stress so I can breathe a sigh of relief. True False
(3) I notice that other people seem to be happy and are living great lives, but I don’t know how to do that for myself or where to start. True False
(4) I am sick and tired of being sick and tired of not understanding and wondering why happiness seems to elude me no matter what I do. True False
(5) I believe that my happiness is determined by others and outside circumstances, therefore I believe that I have very little to no control over my own happiness. True False
(6) I am just waiting for that one more thing to happen and then I’ll be happy whether it is in my personal life or professional life. True False
(7) I know I am a good person and want to believe that good things should happen for me. True False
(8) I believe that it is normal to suffer, to experience adversity, to live through hard times and pay my dues so that happiness will come later. True False
(9) I have no idea what it even means to be happy, what it looks like, what it feels like, or how it should show itself. It’s been too long since I have had happy moments. True False
(10) I don’t have time right now to be happy. My life is too busy. I’m too busy working, taking care of the children, too busy just living and making ends meet to be worried about being happy. True False
If you have answered True to any of the above statements, you are in the same boat as most other people. And you will probably want a copy of my “Five Tools to Moving Towards Happiness.”
Thank you for taking the time to read my article and I look forward to hearing from you. And remember, “As the negative goes, the positive flows.” Elizabeth J. Macarthur
Is My Happiness Where I Really Think It is - To learn more about this author, visit Elizabeth J. Macarthur's Website.
Like this article? Share it with your friends
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 Elizabeth J. Macarthur (Visit Elizabeth's Website) Elizabeth Macarthur is a Certified Facilitator and Empowerment Consultant specializing in enhancing self esteem, confidence, happiness and communication skills. Elizabeth has spent the last 10 years educating, empowering and supporting clients with achieving higher levels of happiness, success, prosperity, relationships, etc. Elizabeth has also been delivering online educational, interactive workshops in her private seminar room (Webinar style) since 2002. Elizabeth’s enthusiasm and passion for her work, fresh approach, sharing of her own life's experiences and unique style supports her in connecting with her clients. In 2005 Elizabeth was awarded "Facilitator of the Year" for her outstanding work and is considered an expert in the areas of self esteem and happiness. Elizabeth is passionate about supporting anyone who is interested in creating something different for themselves and she has access to a variety of workshops and processes to make it happen. "I know that happiness, self esteem and confidence building are an inside job and require support, work and new information to reach and maintain new levels. www.results-that-matter.com
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