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MAKING REQUESTS GRACIOUSLY

Written by: Ruth Hegarty

Article Overview: Much of my work focuses on encouraging people to acknowledge and harness the gifts and talents they already possess because I believe that kind of thinking leads to excellence and success. Part of acknowledging our strengths is making peace with our areas of weakness. This article teaches you how to graciously make requests of others in those situations where your own personal gifts, talents, time, money, etc. just aren’t enough to get the job done alone.

MAKING REQUESTS GRACIOUSLY

"The desire accomplished is sweet to the soul." King Solomon

Much of my work focuses on encouraging people to acknowledge and harness the gifts and talents they already possess because I believe that kind of thinking leads to excellence and success. Part of acknowledging our strengths is making peace with our areas of weakness. This article teaches you how to graciously make requests of others in those situations where your own personal gifts, talents, time, money, etc. just aren’t enough to get the job done alone.

Sometimes we just can't do it all ourselves and many people have difficulty asking for help in certain areas. I say certain areas because there are some instances where we think nothing of making requests of others. We boldly walk up to the counter at Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts and request our coffee exactly how we like it. We happily ask for substitutions or sauce on the side in restaurants and when our birthdays are imminent many of us even circulate lists of requested gifts including size and color specifications. Some might say these are quite different situations, but I disagree. Making requests of others is making requests of others no matter what the circumstances. Why should it be so much more difficult to ask a colleague or supervisor for help with a project or prioritizing than it is to ask the person serving us in a restaurant, a perfect stranger really, to cook our meal to our exact specifications? Is it the money? Is it that you are likely never to see that server again while you have to work with your colleague and supervisor again tomorrow? Sometimes we think making requests of others feels like weakness, or like too much exposure of our inner selves. In truth, making requests of others is a way to share ourselves and our lives. Think about it, when a friend asks you for a favor aren't you usually glad to be of assistance? With a few exceptions of people who tend to take advantage (and we've all known one or two of them), we tend to enjoy adding value to the lives of others. Flip that around to how others feel when we ask them for a favor. Our friends, family and colleagues most often are happy to assist us. You don't have to get overwhelmed doing it all yourself. Add value to others by asking them to help you. Give it a try!

Here are six tips to make making requests even easier:

1. Be specific. If you want help with a project, make suggestions of exactly what needs to be done. People want to be told.
2. Don't wait until the last minute. Be honest with yourself. If you are going to need help with a project, make your request in a timely fashion so as not to put undue stress on the person you are asking for help.
3. Be selective. Although it is perfectly fine to ask for help, it's not OK to take advantage of others. You don't want to get a reputation for putting your work onto others. Be honest about what you need help with and what you can do on your own.
4. Thank your helpers. Make sure you acknowledge the help you receive. Even though people are generally happy to help, they still appreciate a heart-felt thank you. If someone helps you with a particularly big project, a small thank you gift is also appropriate.
5. Be willing to reciprocate when appropriate.
6. Don’t take “no” personally. As much as it’s acceptable for you to ask for help, it’s also appropriate for the “askee” to say no to your request. Sometimes the person you ask is not in a position to do a favor. Don’t be discouraged. Ask someone else.

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Article Tags: birthdays, circumstances, coffee, colleague, desire, dunkin donuts, exact specifications, exceptions, instances, king solomon, peace, perfect stranger, personal gifts, prioritizing, restaurants, starbucks, supervisor, talents, time money, truth
Referred by: http://www.LeadingEdgeCoaching.com



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