Accountability
I just finished up with my coaching singles training recently and was reminded of something I wanted to share.
The training was held once a week. In the second last class we were to identify a goal that we wanted to reach and then list 1-3 action steps we were willing to take by the next class and report back to the class on how we did. Luckily, this class was just before Christmas so it gave us an additional week to complete our action steps.
At the beginning of the next class, which was also the last class, we were asked to report on what we completed. The whole idea behind the exercise was to experience how accountability can be a motivator. Many of the participants had stated that they were much more driven to do the action steps because they knew they had to report back to class how they made out.
Obviously this was just a generic test, but statistics back this up as well.
Behavior = Probability
Come up with an idea = 10%
Consciously decide to adopt the idea = 20%
Set a date to complete = 40%
Put a plan in place = 50%
Commit to someone else = 65%
Have a specific accountability appointment = 95%
After the class I reflected on the exercise. When I was listening to the other class members’ talk about how motivated they were because they did not want to let the class down and look like failures, I wondered whether or not success could be had if they chose to be accountable to themselves as well. This is important since we don’t always have someone or a group to hold our feet to the fire.
That is when I started to remember a particular situation where that did occur for me. My husband and I separated in the month of January. In February I attended an intensive weekend workshop. In that workshop I was introduced to “acknowledgements”. Acknowledgements are used to help you identify positive things about yourself.
The way it works is everyday you are suppose to identify five things that you acknowledge yourself for, starting each acknowledgement with “I acknowledge myself for …..” . I thought this was a cool idea and thought I would give a shot. So when I came home from the weekend workshop I dusted off my journal and started my daily acknowledgements. Since everything was new and different everyday due to the separation I had no problem coming up with acknowledgements initially.
Well as the weeks went by it became harder and harder to come up with acknowledgements. But I wasn’t willing to quit. What happened was I found that I started to think of things that I could do differently so I would have something to acknowledge myself for each day. Little by little I started to step outside my comfort zone and take a risk just so I could have something to right in that blasted journal at the end of the day.
One particular situation sticks in my mind still today. As I mentioned earlier my husband and I separated in the month of January. My birthday is in April. So I found myself facing a birthday alone during a period of emotional turmoil. Well I resolved that I would not spend it alone and unhappy. So I decided I would throw myself a birthday party. This was a huge step outside my comfort zone, as one of my greatest fears in life is “rejection” and this was definitely a way to set myself up for rejection. I hand delivered my hand made invitations and had an amazing response. I must say it was probably one of the best birthdays I ever had.
I have my commitment to “acknowledgements” to thank for having the strength to take this step. After all I needed something to write in my acknowledgement journal. So again, I ask can we be just as successful by being accountable to ourselves as we are being accountable to others? I say, yes!
What is it that you want to achieve? How will you achieve it? Can you be your own support system when others are not available? Give it a try. Start your acknowledgement journal today. See how just a few entries can help you see you and your world a little different.
Hey, we are going to think things about ourselves and others no matter what, right? Why not choose to see the positive in ourselves and others rather than the negative. We or someone taught us how to think negatively about ourselves, so I challenge you to retrain yourself to see the good more than the bad. Give it a try. What do you have to lose? Nothing except your negative self-esteem.
Want to increase the likelihood of accomplishing your goals by having an accountability partner? Great then sign up for a sample coaching session today at http://www.lisafredette.com/contact.htm
Accountability Helping you Reach your Goals - To learn more about this author, visit Lisa A. Fredette's Website.
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Lisa A. Fredette
(Visit Lisa's Website)
Lisa Fredette is a certified life coach,
licensed relationship coach and owner of
Passionate About Life Coaching and
Passionate About Life Coach Divorce
Recovery Coaching Club. Lisa is also a
host of the Living Passionately radio
show, contributing columnist for the
Women's Online Magazine and a platinum
expert author for Ezine Article Directory
and Expert Author of the Relationship
Coaching Network. As a coach Lisa supports
individuals who are motivated to take
their divorce recovery to the next level.
She offers one on one coaching, group
coaching programs and teleseminars. In
addition she provides many resources
through her free report Be the Navigator,
her bimonthly newsletter "Living
Passionately", her ebook series Turning
your Divorce into a Celebration of Life,
sample coaching sessions and a community
of support through her coaching club.
These services and resources are available
at www.li
safredette.com and www.passionateaboutlifecoach.com
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