On a recent plane trip, I met a successful 45-year-old attorney bemoaning his life with the statement; “ I can’t wait until I retire”. I asked, “why”. He said, “I have no life”.
I asked, “What did that mean?” He replied, “ I’m never home for diner and do not get to see my family. I rarely get to do anything I love. All I do is work under pressure.”
I asked, “So when can you retire?
“Not for a long time because there are private schools, camps, colleges for the kids, big house, country club, my wife does not work…”
I asked, “Can you re-organize your practice so you can get more time.” He said, “Impossible, clients are demanding, won’t trust associates, schedules are erratic… You see I am trapped”.
Looking back on the conversation, it is clear that this person saw no options or possibilities and lives in the dream of “Someday, I’ll”. This is only one person’s story. However, it is a universal one that could have been about a whole litany of life circumstances. Too often, it takes a life altering event to create the time and space to see options.
Reality is that “Tomorrow never comes”. It keeps showing up as the same old unfulfilled todays when we do not create some time to reflect on the possibility that there is a better way. There are some other choices to creating the present and therefore, the future we want.
Getting started on making changes does not have to be complicated. It can begin with setting aside twenty to thirty minutes to answer the following three powerful questions to identify what to focus on immediately.
1. What do I want for the rest of my life? (It can be life enhancements like more fun, closer relationships, develop/express creativity, beautiful environment, feel good, be more organized, travel. It may be business/career related like money, power, new challenges, influence, financial independence, purpose.)
2. What are ten things about my life that I love and want to have forever?
3. What are ten things about my life I am tolerating and want to say good-bye to?
The next step is to determine three actions you can take to get more of what you want and three actions you can take to get rid of what is draining your life.
Getting what you want for the rest of your life is possible if willing to exchange commitment to taking action for complaints. You know you are on the right track when you are having conversations with others about what you want, what you are doing to get there and asking for suggestions and support. The rest of your life is a hopefully a long time so plan on making this a habit. Start now by answering the questions----and share with someone else.
Note: Marcia Grubel is a Career/Life and Business Coach who coaches clients nationally and internationally by phone. If you have interest in being coached professionally on these questions and exploring new possibilities, visit website www.MGcoach.com or e-mail MG.coach@verizon.net
To learn more about this author, visit Marcia Grubel's Website.
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