Tweet

Letting Yourself Have Outrageous Success and Personal Happiness

Written by: Lorraine Cohen

Article Overview: What do you tell yourself that makes it ok to say no to having what you want or need? When we continue to sabotage ourselves, it’s because we get something from it. There’s always a payoff. What's yours?

Letting Yourself Have Outrageous Success and Personal Happiness

Last week I did a presentation to a room full of women business owners, entrepreneurs, and leaders. The topic was "Letting Yourself Have Outrageous Success and Personal Happiness".

I looked forward to talking about the topic because so often I hear people complain about not having enough money, struggling with procrastination and overwhelm, feeling stuck or unhappy with themselves, their work, their life......

My client came in this morning angry and in a funk. She was angry with herself because she was dragging her feet on doing some things that would create financial ease in her life. Instead she was feeling desperate about paying her bills and was beating herself up for creating her situation. She has tons of tools to help her shift her attitude, feel more upbeat and positively energized. What was she doing about how she felt or the strain on her finances? Nothing. She was putting all of her attention on feeling bad and powerless.

• Mind games – risk aversion, avoidance (excuses, rationalizations, justifications) that might sound like, “I know what I’m supposed to do but I just don’t do it” I can’t afford it. I don’t have the time. Now is not the right time, I’m not ready".

• Dramas/stories – The conversations we have inside our heads (worse case scenarios, imaginings). We tell ourselves, "I can’t do it. It’s too hard/too big. It will take too long...."

• Negative beliefs – We hold on to conscious and unconscious beliefs that dictate who we are, how we feel, and what we do (or don't do). We tell ourselves, "I’m not smart enough/good enough/. Good things happen to others – not me".

• Fear – fear of success/failure, pain and pleasure are the most dominant fears. We scare ourselves into despair and immobility. We make up stories to justify saying no to our dreams and desires.

• Procrastination leads to feeling guilty. We become disappointed and feel frustrated because we believe we have broken our agreement and promises to ourselves and others. That gives up permission to beat ourselves up. We punish ourselves and withhold the good stuff.

Exactly my point of last week's presentation.

What we do is engage in self-sabotage

What do you tell yourself that makes it ok to say no to having what you want or need? When we continue to sabotage ourselves, it’s because we get something from it. There’s always a payoff.
What's yours?

Wanna stop?

You can!

Anytime you say.

How about NOW?

Here are some keys to help your shift from NO to GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

1. Power of alignment – Inner conflict is felt when we are in discord with our heads and our heart. When your decisions, choices and actions line up with your spirit, core values, true desires and vision your life will have greater prosperity and happiness. Get to know yourself well. Make it a practice to listen to your heart, follow your instincts and trust yourself.

2. Deliberately choose to have better feelings and thoughts. Your imagined fears, negative self-talk, and beliefs about unworthiness serve you to recognize when you are in your drama and self-created stories by. Notice how you are feeling and what you are thinking. Your thoughts affect how you feel and what you do. When you can see what’s happening, you can choose to become the champion of your story or the victim of your circumstance. What you put your attention on expands.

3. Clarify what you really want . What inspires and excites you?

Identify a strong dream or desire.
Write down why you want it.
What will “having it” give you that you don’t have now?
Why do you want that?
What will having it……

Run this exercise to get to the heart of what you really want.

4. Decide to have it. Give yourself permission to receive what you want and desire. Commit to it. Refuse to take no for an answer.

5. Develop a positive/empowering mindset by challenging and replacing replace self-defeating attitudes and behaviors. Feel compassion and self- love by focusing on what’s right about you; what makes you special and unique.

6. Install accountability. Add people and systems to your team to help you stay motivated and inspired. Show up.

7. Create a power strategy when you need a boost. Add things that motivate, inspire, nurture you – gratitude. When you give to yourself, the people in your life will get the best of you, instead of what’s left of you.

Remember to celebrate your successes along the way!

As you go through your day, I challenge you to let yourself have what you need and want to have the success and happiness you desire.

~ Say yes to following up with those business leads, calling prospects, attending networking events, taking 5 marketing actions today....

~ Say yes to booking that massage, taking a long weekend, scheduling a lunch with a friend...

~ Say yes to registering for that class, learning one new skill, hiring a coach...

Say yes to having the abundance you want and the life you dream about. It’s time to become the hero of your own life story. If not now, when?

Copyright (C) 2007 Lorraine Cohen.

Related Articles
  Outrageous Health and Wellbeing - Better quality questions lead to a better quality life
  Happiness Is A Decision
  Warning: Are You Being Hit With The Outrageous Askers?
  Is it finally time to forgive
  Pursuit of Happiness

Article Tags: avoidance, case scenarios, dreams and desires, enough money, fear of success, imaginings, immobility, justifications, mind games, negative beliefs, outrageous success, pain and pleasure, personal happiness, procrastination, risk aversion, success failure, tons of tools, unconscious beliefs, women business owners, worse case



Related Forum Posts
Re: The secret to happiness - Happiness comes from within. We choose whether we want to be happy or not. Circumstances can influence our feelings, but in the end, it's up to us how we deal with our circumstances, positively or negatively. I admire anyone who can stay strong and be happy through adversity. There will always be challenges that we face, but I believe that if we face them with our heads held high, the odds of overcoming them are much greater. This reminds me of the movie "The Pursuit of Happyness." Happiness spelled wrong for a reason. One of Will Smith's greatest movies. I encourage you all to watch it as it's very inspiring.
Re: The secret to happiness - Happiness is working on the job you love. I forgot who said this, "give a man the job he loves doing and he will ever work again in his life"
Re: THE SECRET TO SUCCESS IS ALL IN YOUR HEAD...RIGHT NOW!!! - Success = Thinking (Head) + Heart (Feeling / Interest) + Hand (doing/ action). Success - H3 Robert
Re: Twitter vs Facebook - I know this is a naive question but i'm really not sure: What do you tweet ? Business? promote your business? Personal? Are there things you can't do? ALSO :Is there a rule book? Is there a success formula using twitter?
Re: Best Internet Marketing Strategies - Personal development and knowledge are important but as Mat says without action nothing will happen. So don't spend so long learning that you fail to follow through, rather learn as you go along but do something everyday towards achieving your goal. MichelleJ


Share this article with your friends. Fund someone's dream.

Leave a comment below or share on the left and you'll help support entrepreneurs in Africa through our partnership with Kiva. Over $50,000 raised and counting - Please keep sharing! Learn more.

Tweet

Newsletter

Get advice & tips from famous business
owners, new articles by entrepreneur
experts, my latest website updates, &
special sneak peaks at what's to come!

Name:
Email:

Popular Articles

Adjusting Your World

Ten Things You Can Do To Be a Better Leader

2011 Global Brand Trends Letter

Suggestions

Email us your ideas on how to make our
website more valuable! Thank you Sharon
from Toronto Salsa Lessons / Classes for
your suggestions to make the newsletter
look like the website and profile younger
entrepreneurs like Jennifer Lopez.