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Getting from Child-ish to Child-like

Written by: Les Brown

Article Overview: Education turns out to be a process that separates the individual from his or her intuition. Midlife offers an opportunity to recapture what was lost.

Getting from Child-ish to Child-like

The myth of the happy childhood hides a sad truth: that one of the principal effects of 'education' seems to be the process of 'disillusionment'. I call this process 'sad', but, in fact, it's more like 'tragic'. In early childhood, youngsters are more closely aligned with their inner destiny than perhaps at any other time of their lives. Once this vision — essentially a spiritual kind of knowledge — has been lost, it may or may not ever be regained. And yet, our educational system seems to approach the intuitive nature of young people as 'just daydreaming' or 'fantasy'. Yet, perhaps the greatest challenge of midlife rests in attempting to enable the adult (the 'educated' child) to recapture his or her initial, primitive life vision. Without a sense of the person you're called to be how will you ever be able to replace the life vision and goals that midlife exposes as empty and disingenuous?

You and I were literally educated to disregard our deepest sentiments, and trained to want what everyone else has . . . and more. The kind of 'reality' that we're shown from our earliest years, a reality where marketing to promote the desire for acquisition overshadows all other values, produces adults locked into a childish 'me-centered' world. Creative people find themselves classified as 'dreamers' and crticized as 'unrealistic'. Those who have been gifted with extraordinary talents (like spiritual discernment or extra-sensory knowledge) fare even worse. They are most often ridiculed by their peers (with adult encouragement) and threatened with psychological 'correction' unless and until they abandon their 'errant imaginations.' You and I have been victims of a system that taught us to ignore, disregard, and disparage our own deepest sense of self. The extent of this damage only really appears at midlife, when the artifice of 'adulthood' begins to play itself out.

The closer you come to 'success', the more the core fallacy of adulthood gets uncovered: when you obtain what you want, what's left? Most often, this sense of disillusionment provides fertile ground for marketing. It says, "I know you feel disillusioned and empty in spite of all you've gained, but look here: if you get this, you'll be much happier!" If you listen to the marketing, you'll find that your desire will motivate you toward going after that thing (whatever it may be) that you lack. Almost immediately, you're dreams will be stimulated, and you'll feel a sense of purpose. You'll feel a sense of satisfaction until, that is, you've acquired your new possession. Then, it starts all over again. But, what if you never attain your goal? What if, as you strive to acquire your newest object of desire, you overreach and overextend yourself? What happens if you not only fail to reach your goal, but lose what you have in the process? How do you measure that pain?

The Buddha taught that the cause of all suffering is desire. You don't have to go far to prove him right: just ask any one of the thousands of men and women who've lost their homes through foreclosure in recent months. For those whose sense of self-worth remains fixed on acquisition, loss of their assets represents the greatest tragedy. And yet, isn't this a very childish attitude? I suggest that it represents the immaturity that hides at the core of the adult experience, and that the sort of disillusionment that the cycle of desire and acquisition necessarily brings can actually be the door to something more substantial, more authentic, more basic and more primordial. When the childish myth of 'more = better' finally dissolves, you have the opportunity to go back to the beginning (before you were 'educated out of it') to recapture the vision that nourished and sustained you in childhood. You get the chance to reject the adult paradigm that tells you that the reason you're here is to consume more; and to recover the inner gift that you have to offer the world: a gift that's uniquely your own to give.

The Christian Scriptures speak of "becoming like a little child", and many people have interpreted that to mean trusting in you Higher Power. That's important, but only part of the insight. It also means regaining a childlike trust in your own intuition as a powerful indicator of the identity of the person you were designed and designated to be. Your particular mix of strengths, talents, knowledge, skills and experience is unique to you. It's only when, facing the often-painful stripping-away of childish desires and goals that make up the midlife experience, you are able to return the childlike clarity of initial life vision that you can begin truly to discern your purpose. It takes real courage to go against popular culture and all the assumptions that go with it. Yet your chance to show your courage comes with your entry into the midlife transition. When you exercise your courage, and when you give your core life vision the engagement that it deserves, miracles happen. Suddenly, you no longer need to look outside of yourself for your purpose and direction: you own it. What's more, you'll discover that the dreams of childhood will come true, only without the limitations of a child's imagination. It'll feel like, at long last, coming home.

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Article Tags: adulthood, artifice, disillusionment, dreamers, early childhood, educational system, fallacy, greatest challenge, imaginations, intuitive nature, life vision, midlife, primitive life, principal effects, sad truth, sense of self, sensory knowledge, spiritual discernment, spiritual kind, youngsters



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Re: help wanted in u.k. - Thanks David You just hit the important point I think there, I had an article about it, in a combat magazine and a middle-aged guy who worked late in the underground tube, contacted me, said he had tried all the fighting classes for about 8 years, saw my device and thought that’s what he needed most, quick accurate motor skills, and awareness and in his case the chance to flee quickly from trouble or to get help, the grown up way for a person caught on their own, not the obsessive violent stuff being sold everywhere. I met him and gave him instructions on how to make one, He was I perceived, a very calm, grounded sensible man. Never heard from him for about 4weeks when he rang up and said ,yes you are right it works just as you said it never gets entangled. So he had hit on the two initial crucial points or questions, 1 - multi-target training is important in self defence ( motor skills and awareness is, in any sport) 2- can such a device be made which is simple practical and performs well. Because what I found out from this first invention of mine is, that an inventor must be a teacher. People say what has such and such a qualified or important person thought about it, and I know now, that its partly irrelevant what design gurus or people in the industry thought about it, because only the inventor and a few insightful people initially, are the authority on it. The dragons den is the name of the show you asked about. (they did not invite me on the show though they gave me tips and wished me luck) They want, in my opinion, ready made businesses, people who speak their own type of language. Hard nosed bargainers. Who project about imaginary profits etc. What they end up with mostly I think is well marketed successful products but its mostly landfill. Forgettable, harmful to mankind or at best of no consequence in the long term (often down right silly things). This simple invention is different I think, it will be in widespread use long after we are all dead perhaps, Its easy to manufacture it 100% eco friendly (and that’s crucial to me). The inventor (myself) has no financial security or real business experience and cringes at the meanness and selfish theory of business as we know it. Which is irrelevant to the success of the business because the product is a winner and the inventor has the filing rights and the good world intellectual property report. The product is crucial to sport and health, will be available to even the poor and definitely not just money making, landfill. These programmes (shows) are full of hysterical people, dragons and contestants, to whom becoming a millionaire (or a millionaire again) is crucial, it seems senseless illogical Childish, we live in the west nobody has died of starvation here for many years (I hope).Becoming rich is not a necessity for anyone, it should just be as much fun as possible and if anyone thinks they should humiliate or hurt peoples feelings along the way for any reason (like on these shows) they should forget about becoming richer and get their head examined instead. Bottom line is it’s a great invention and it just needs a little funding to keep it alive, right now, ( to file within the pct time limit, that is!!) it will be successful eventually for someone , no matter what (maybe not me) Hope I did not bore you with the long post Cheers Brendan


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