Tweet

Anger Rising

Guest post by: Jeannie Campanelli, Ed.D., CPCC

Article Overview: Anger is a feeling that is or has been a challenge for most of us to accept and express in healthy ways. Collectively, we receive a multitude of messages about anger being ‘bad’ or ‘negative’ or ‘wrong’.

Anger Rising

The reality is that we all know that acting out anger can cause problems in our relationships. We've been the recipient of anger that has left us feeling bruised metaphorically (and, for some, literally), and/or we've been the one who has expressed anger in a persecuting way and watched a relationship dissolve because of it. The voice of anger can be driven by the victim within us who then wants to blame someone else for our suffering. Anger rising might be a signal that boundaries have been crossed. Or that we are engaged in a power struggle - an "I'm right"/"No, I'm right" kind of exchange.

Some people even say, 'I'm an angry person" or "you're an angry person", attaching anger to either their own or someone else's identity. In other words, it's like saying, "This is the box of anger that contains me/you. I see the world and everything in it through this box".

We likely also know what it's like to work hard to suppress anger: afraid of the consequences; trying logically to talk ourselves out of feeling anger; doing our best to push it away like a meddlesome relative; turning away from looking underneath the surface of anger where either fear or hurt can live.

In the avoidance of anger is the possibility of its leaking out onto others in passive-aggressive, controlling, and manipulative ways. Or the energy of anger remains contracted in our bodies and shows up as tension, aches, and/or pain.

What is different when we give ourselves completely to feeling anger? What do we notice at a body level when we open our hearts to anger without resistance? Welcoming it like a lost child coming home...embracing it....entirely feeling the frequency, the vibration, the atmosphere of it? Trusting that it's just a feeling that is passing through, separate from who we truly are?

Experiment. The next time anger visits you, notice where the tension lies in your body. Place your hand there and breathe into the frequency of anger without the story. Give yourself permission to truly feel the vibration of anger - all of it. Courageously meet the anger that has come to visit, allow yourself to feel its full power.

Then relax back into the chair and place your focus on your breath - the in-breath entering the heart and the out-breath coming from the heart. Notice the sensations in the body. Listen to the message of the heart. What is your life asking of you?

Embracing all feelings - such as anger - in a compassionate and powerful way is a useful practice. From my own experience both personally and as a coach, what I know is any release can benefit greatly from the presence of a safe and loving witness who will hold the space for you to go as deeply as you need to go.

Related Articles
  Fear of Anger - Yours and Others
  EQ Leadership Vital Sign The Power of Anger
  Leadership Tips: How to Spot Many Forms of Anger
  The Third Deadly Workplace Sin: Anger
  Anger – The Hardest Employee Performance Emotion For Managers To Deal With
  Anger Power
  Learn why you need to Manage your Anger!
  Inspirational and Motivational Tips for Giving Early Rising a Chance
  Getting Angry Doesn’t Benefit Anyone
  Be on the Lookout For Desk Rage
  Anger Management Practice The gift of forgiveness
  Speaking Your Truth When it's Hard
  Are You MAD?
  Home Business Opportunity - Learning To Control Emotions
  How To Calm An Angry Person
  Anger Management
  How to Deal With Emotional Employees
  How to Be a Source of Inspiration
  How Will The Roller Coaster Changes In Life Affect You
  Struggling to "Be Here Now"?

Article Tags: anger, angry person, atmosphere, avoidance, body level, boundaries, br, coming home, consequences, fear, hearts, power struggle, recipient, relationship, relationships, resistance, suffering, tension, vibration



Related Forum Posts
Re: Job market slump is a guy thing - Yes, it does complicate things when you get promoted and then manage your previous peers. Rising through the ranks can really "urk" the people who aren't rising with you, especially if they have more of a negative view. You can then be the subject of their frustration. The important thing is to realize this is about them and not about you. Otherwise, it can be really difficult as a leader.


Share this article with your friends. Fund someone's dream.

Leave a comment below or share on the left and you'll help support entrepreneurs in Africa through our partnership with Kiva. Over $50,000 raised and counting - Please keep sharing! Learn more.

Newsletter

Get advice & tips from famous business
owners, new articles by entrepreneur
experts, my latest website updates, &
special sneak peaks at what's to come!

Name:
Email:

Popular Articles

Build Corporate Credit for Your Small Business

Email Marketing Made Easy #11 - Avoiding Spam

Why Use an Advertising Agency

Suggestions

Email us your ideas on how to make our
website more valuable! Thank you Sharon
from Toronto Salsa Lessons / Classes for
your suggestions to make the newsletter
look like the website and profile younger
entrepreneurs like Jennifer Lopez.