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Finding SelfWorth

Written by: Jane Straus

Article Overview: Dear Jane, I know I'm self-critical. But how do I stop? My self-esteem is at about a zero and the lower it's gone, the worse it seems others treat me. In my self-help book, Enough Is Enough!, I talk about what it’s like to hang out in Courtroom Earth vs. the Classroom Earth. In Courtroom Earth, we act as our own judge, jury, and executioner. Most of the time, we don’t even realize we’re doing this to ourselves. What about you? Do you beat yourself up for everything? Do you compare yourself to other people? Do you find yourself being driven, addicted to more and more evidence to prove that you are worthy? Then do you end up tired, resentful, frustrated, short tempered, with an even greater urge to control and do?

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Finding SelfWorth

Dear Jane,
I know I'm self-critical. But how do I stop? My self-esteem is at about a zero and the lower it's gone, the worse it seems others treat me.
In my self-help book, Enough Is Enough!, I talk about what it’s like to hang out in Courtroom Earth vs. the Classroom Earth. In Courtroom Earth, we act as our own judge, jury, and executioner. Most of the time, we don’t even realize we’re doing this to ourselves. What about you? Do you beat yourself up for everything? Do you compare yourself to other people? Do you find yourself being driven, addicted to more and more evidence to prove that you are worthy? Then do you end up tired, resentful, frustrated, short tempered, with an even greater urge to control and do?

If you are willing to say, “Enough is enough” to that ceaseless, destructive mind chatter, then here’s how to hang out in Classroom Earth, where you get to learn and grow:

1. Tell yourself that you are worthy and deserving and so is everyone else.
2. Take some deep breaths to slow down and pay attention to your thoughts. Your thoughts are powerful, particularly the unconscious ones. Shining the light onto them is valuable.
3. Ask for support and compassion instead of inviting harshness and criticism.

We teach others how to treat us by how we treat ourselves. So the world is mirroring your thoughts. Choose loving, self-respecting thoughts and you will get those mirrored back to you.

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Home > Work-Life > Jane Straus > Finding SelfWorth
Article Tags: classroom earth, compassion, courtroom, deep breaths, executioner, harshness, loving self, mind chatter, self esteem, self help book, shining the light, urge

About the Author: Jane Straus
RSS for Jane's articles - Visit Jane's website

Relationship expert, author, radio host, and media guest, Jane Straus gives individuals, couples, and organizations the tools to thrive and experience the extraordinary in life. Visit her media page to view her clips from shows on ABC, CBS, and NBC; peruse her articles in USA Today, CNN.com, Woman's World Magazine, and other print publications; and read her newsletters and excerpts from her popular self-help book, Enough Is Enough! Stop Enduring and Start Living Your Extraordinary Life. She is also the author of a bestseller, The Blue Book of Grammar and Punctuation and founder of www.grammarbook.com, one of the most popular online resources for English usage rules, examples, and quizzes--all FREE. Contact Jane at Jane@JaneStraus.com.

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